It always feels like I am bleeding,
Like I have been slashed multiple times,
And simply left here,
Effectively paralyzed,
My entire life dismissed,
As mere dust waiting to die,
And the world tells me,
With great clarity and force,
That I am powerless.

Golden eyes drink dry
Goblets of sunrays

Swallowing gallows of Greed
Guzzling and Gobbling

Like fat cats gazing
Down upon field mice

Gallantly waiting for
False Gods, redeeming
Envy's green deciet

Watching life unfold,
My life.
Powerless to change the way I am,
Unable to control the way my life goes,
No control on this ride through the years.

My life feels like a movie,
The sets made up,
The actors with lines remembered,
The events set to unfold despite me.

I spend the day thinking,
"Don't do that"
"Why are you doing that"

But I cannot stop myself from taking these actions.

I'm utterly without control,
A spectator in my own life,
A watcher from inside my body.
It's a strange feeling and I wish I could change it

Lest you are playing tricks on me
Let me warn you

I can make time stand still
and the moon dissappear

I can change the course of winds
and orchestrate waves to rise,
flooding plains and barren lands

lest you are playing games

I will open a portal
where we spin out of time,
hurl through space
and land on Mars.

But the one thing
I can't do
Is figure out if
you are playing games,
or is is that you just don't care
for me ?

Beaten down by the highs and lows.
Impossible to evade its call.
Promises of incredible power,
Only results in incredible pain.
Loneliness is my current residence.
Aware that I am powerless,
And running from who I am.

Good morning lover,
I am still watching the stars
While yours are long hidden behind the hectic of your world
And I just wanted to explain to you something
Before I close my eyes

You see, I want you to know
That anger is always rooted by powerlessness
And pain will always come from love
How with you so far away
All my senses lost their mind
And I feel only from my longing for you

There is nothing else
Nothing more
But the space you are not occupying

I'm done

Fighting
Trying
Fixing

I'm done

Being a cliche
Not making the cut
Being picked on

But yet here I am, doing all those things
Cliche
Cut
Picked

So I try to do as they say
And do something different

I cry instead of keeping it in
I talk instead of bottling up
I become vivid instead of shutting down

I'm done

Feeling stupid
Feeling useless
Feeling powerless

I'm done

Trapped
Pawn
Kid

I'm ready
Ready to stop taking it
Ready to take control
Ready to get out

So here I am
I'm done
I'm ready
So
I'm gone.