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Amanda Kay Burke Apr 2022
I heard your music
Off-key and beat behind tune
I still tapped my feet
If people were melodies
Dakota J Dawson Feb 2022
Where are you
That I’m lost
For you’re found

Eternal soul
Undercover
A salt bed

Can’t fit
Won’t regard
Refuse contact

I don’t
Become you
Instead hate

In my
Regard the
Ominous regret

Does it
Even matter
Any more
Nigdaw Jan 2022
second sight alternate mind
sliding down the slippery *****
chasing a rabbit into fantasyland
the world is the same but changed
this drink is full of laughter
this drink makes everything strange
and why am I here you may ask
as I refill my already refilled glass
to find myself of course
I've looked everywhere else
and this is the only place I exist
at the bottom of a bottle
recycling  the abyss
I am alive tingling inside
and I know he is waiting
on the hangover side, but
I'll let him deal with it **** it up
while I just crawl away to Hyde
until he is again enticed
to walk away from his Jekyllite life
we're all inmates so what's your poison
prisoners here in alcoholism
Luvanna Nov 2021
Me: A series of fifty-five emotions
interchanging every ten minutes
love me, adore me and I shall grant you your deepest wildest dream
upset me, disappoint me, and I shall consider you dead
Dakota J Dawson Nov 2021
Given in
No more
False

To think
I'm redeemed
A fault

Forgivness is
Laced unto
Selfish pity
Cerasium Sep 2021
My mind has been tormenting me
Constant thoughts of self doubt
Such ill contempt for myself
And it seems to only get worse

I’m trying desperately to push back
But with each day it grows stronger
Pushing me back into a corner
Making me feel small and weak

There are times where I’d win
There are times when it’s a draw
But times like these hurt so bad
Because I’m losing a battle with myself

Sometimes it goes so far
As to make me cry in misery
Begging for my thoughts to be wrong
Hoping and praying that I’ll be okay

Other times it causes me to go numb
To not be able to feel at all
Those are the times I fear the most
It’s when I become the most self sabotaging

I don’t want my brain to win
I can’t let these thoughts cloud my mind
But the harder I fight
The stronger they seem to become

And what hurts the most
Is my past traumas
Becoming worse and worse
Making me lose my ability to trust again

Over the last few years
I have found out that even actions
Are not to be trusted
Much like someone’s word

I’m trying to hard to correct that mindset
To learn to trust again
But the more I try
The harder it gets

I met someone new a few months ago
Someone I really care for and love
But because of my past
My head is evil

Making me question everything I do
Making me question the faith I have for him
All these sabotaging thoughts
And I fight them off everyday

I wish someone told me that dating
After serious trauma is inflicted
Would be harder than anything
Especially with how bad mine was

Maybe I could have prepared myself better
Or tried harder to correct my issue with trust
Maybe I could have healed my pain
So my mind wouldn’t push me away

Because this pain is so much worse
Than the trauma I endured
So much worse than the suffering
I dealt with afterwards

Far worse than the death of a loved one
I feel alone in my suffering
Surrounded by mockery
Silently crying to myself

I don’t know if I’ll be able to win this battle
Not by myself at least
But who do you turn to
When you can’t even trust yourself
Gorba Aug 2021
Organelles, cells, tissues, organs shape my body
My soul, my brain, my heart, my identity
A living mass and a concept ineluctably associated
Without necessarily working adequately together
To build something close to a character
That is, by some, tolerated, by a few, appreciated
Never reaching any sort of unanimity
Leaving the volume of possible interpretations as plenty

Context strictly guides aspects of my behavior
Adding an extra ‘s’ to my idiosyncrasy that primarily seems out of place
When being singular is often what wins the race
Launched by our most ancient ancestor

Am I one or plural?
Do I have one personality or several?
Am I what I think or what I do?
What others see or what I expose?
An ignorant mind with a decent prose
Or a curious man who has no clue?

Asking a question is to get closer to an answer
That might emerge in a distant future
In the meantime, I try to be and do good
To put my loved ones in the best possible mood
Sometimes I succeed, sometimes I fail
But my stubborn intention will always prevail
AJ Aug 2021
i’m still heartbroken,
lost without the person i turned to when my world was upside down.
but you proved that you stopped caring,
just like everyone else before you.
i know i am difficult,
a mess that’s so broken you kept getting cut on the pieces.
you promised me you would be there through thick and thin,
but now here i am becoming a narcissist writing about the pain you’ve caused.
Lev Rosario Jul 2021
The house she grew up in
Is written in her heart
A decaying castle in EDSA
Separated from others
By the torrents of the road

The orange glow of its afternoons
Is the glow of her mind and body
Its rooms replicated in the way she talks
She moves and makes friends

Like the triune God
Which emanates from who?
Theodora or the house?
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