autumn mist rises
across the glazen waters
through the aspen grove

There’s levels to these levels,
she gets me because she gets me,
I’m high on life checking texts for what’s next,
as I navigate my carriage through this city,

staying gluten free like Putin me,
daily practice of Jiu Jitsu and yoga,
the real deal like Holyfield,
I thought I already told ya,

always on a holiday,
a Libra that’s gone till October,
and you think you’re gonna win this race,
but I’ve got news for you it’s already over,

I’m at the finish line with a vintage wine,
making a toast to the good life,
watching the sunrise from my balcony,
already knowing it’s gonna be a good night,

good night.

∆ LaLux ∆

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1.  No matter how much sleep I get , I am internally exhausted.
2. Every time some one breaks my heart I find myself.
3. The rain gives me permission to grieve.
4. I've never seen anything as put together as your face and those blue moons.
5. I am scared to let someone new touch me. I don't want another reason to miss your hands.
6. I don't think I've ever bared naked my heart. I don't know how persuasive that would be.
7. I mean I don't know what staying feels like and I don't want you to leave because I've shown you.
8. I am both beautiful and broken.
9. I don't have to put together these pieces all by myself for me to be deemed worthy.
10. Too much of the wrong thing will weaken you.
11.Too much of the right thing might make you forget that not all women are good. Not all hearts yield with no conditions.
12. I hide because the right person might find me, want to listen, and I may pour over.
13. My biggest fear is being too much. So it always ends up looking like "not enough" and I am sorry.
14. Please forgive my human.
15. Sometimes these stitches come apart and I end up forgetting to remember I'm not pain anymore, I am not turning corners searching and waiting for him.
16. I want to break and come together like ocean.
17. I'll know you when I break and come together like the ocean.
18. I want you to see my October
19. I want you to see my October and stay a while.

The days
between October and December
are a black hole of
false promises.
The past nets
reminders that
changing leaves
and sweater weather
still feel lonely
no matter how
much orange
you dress it up in.

Now and then,
when the wind whips the world warm
and all leaves
are but the blanket to the soil,
early nights bring in the thought of you.
When I think of people
I have loved
I remember a silent memory
so loud
I still hear it in the distance,
They kick and scream.
And you,
peacefully perched
on the marble floor
smiling up at me
at 1am
saying
'i missed you'

Every day since has been October.