I have done it again
I ran away
From fear
From sadness
Far away from the tears

Allow me to be happy
Little one
You’re the only thing
Keeping the monsters at bay
Hardening my spirit
To fight them off

They scream for my happiness
“Give me that!”
“You’re nothing!”
“No one loves you!”
“You should just go die!”
But you calm me
With your sweet charming words
You take me away
From their horrible awful world
And save me
My little teddy bear

Louder than Monsters
By: Calla Fuqua

I can’t unhear your ignorance, I can’t unsee your belligerence,
The potential difference you swore you’d make, and the carnivorous path
You chose to take.
You are louder than monsters.

Heaven must scare you and your desire to dissipate,
Your chance to incriminate, the problems you exacerbate,
I can’t articulate your need to intoxicate.
Your laughter is louder than monsters.

You fabricat your pity you pretend to give, as you wait for me to forgive,
That night I have to relive when I dream, of our short lived view of how happiness seemed.
Back then how could I have known that you were louder than monsters.

Your grip on me becomes tighter, the more your desire for me expires,
The more you secretly become a liar, and the more I ask myself why her?
Her voicemails are louder than monsters.

I end up on the floor, after you hit me and you swore,
You don’t say I love you anymore, the way you used to before,
And now I’m just your little *****, you pretend to love as if it’s a chore.
Your silence is louder than monsters.

I pray for you and the guilt you must feel, screaming out our window,
frantic to appeal, for the pain you caused solely so you could heal.
Your lies are louder than monsters.

You laugh when I say no, giving me a messed up world you pretend to know,
Now it’s my turn to outgrow you and your plateau, the one you promised
To let go. While I undergo the pain you overflow.
My screams are louder than monsters.

I still tell myself you love me after you throw your fists, holding tight to my wrists,
As I keep allowing the crimes you commit, to become imprints from the pain you inflict.
This pain is louder than monsters.

Now, nobody seems sincere, every scar is like a souvenir, You leave me speechless, when you sip your beer, like you didn’t just make my whole world disappear,          
You say you are not louder than monsters.

All I can do now is reminisce, look back on moments like our first kiss,
Before you led me into this abyss, before I was unable to dismiss the thought,
“What kind of monster does this?”
Someone who doesn’t know he is louder than monsters.

I dream about the day I can throw out your ashtray, The day
I can cast away you whole, no more arms to control my body’s soul,
A day where I no longer have to be your wife,
A day where I can play a character in my own life.
A day where love is louder than monsters

Rolling power:
      Churning waves
      Grinding shells,
      Prolific evidence of life & death
      Rising from salt depths,
Epic revelations from below.

Evidence of end games:
     Shells, drilled, scarred, scored
     By beaks of tendrilled monsters;
     Occupants devoured,
****** through ravaged carapaces.

Fecund progeny:
    Tiny messages, these shells...
    Evidencing life,
    Echoing death,
Generations grinding down and down.

My tanned bare feet,
    Track tide-lined shells,
     Seek forensic evidence and beauty,
     Follow ribbons of shells
Cast empty from the pounding sea.

i kept those monsters locked in a cage,
so they couldn't get out.
but hell,
i didn't know caging my heart cost me a lot.

Ups and Downs
Sideways, Inside-Out
But at the end of everyday i'm in your arms

You're just human
And I couldn't ask for more
Because my past is full of monsters
So human is a nice change

And I know it's not flashy or shiny
It's not perfect and pretty
But it's mine
And I wouldn't trade it for the world

I don't care if it is never like the movies
I've never been one for the silver screen
Because flowers fade and die but rocks are forever
And this is solid as rock

Tears and fits put you on edge
But you have no clue as you try to help me reach perfect
Just how far I've come with you
Because you shine so much brighter than the darkness in my heart

And I cant remember the last time I dreaded sunrise
Because the long nights of my past made morning a mere dream
But now I could lay in the darkness forever
As long as I have you by my side

I know you're not perfect
I'm not either
But at the end of the day you're perfect to me

The shadows watch
They follow and they see
watch the shadows for you will see
their more then just you
Their your monster...
dont run from your monster
dont run for it will win...
Then what?

Help

I'm falling

In falling water

The lie is cold

And drives my soul

Sick irony takes a stroll

Down the black

I'm alone

In this winsome hole

That leads to the fall

To depths of icy gall

Monsters are at the bottom

They'll eat me

They'll maul

Help

I'm writhing

In the ice of the sun

But to me

It's a glacier

The falling water ends here

Oh no

I'll freeze

This is where I die

No


Longer



Me




Goodbye
I love you