Though I see well enough
Lucidity escapes me
Left withering and splintering
In the face of change
In spite of the ending
Something writhes inside of me
A solitary heave
Railing against eternity

But I still cling
To the bits of shade

Every death is unique
As detailed as a fingerprint
I'm still not sure how to communicate
This intrusive thought, it never goes away

Please...
I need is to die knowing
That it wasn't all for nothing
That I gave this life for something

Maybe I've been too detached
Maybe I've been contradicting
Falling fast from what I'm needing
In hopes of finding something real

So outside the mind, enhanced
I see visions of my self
Inside my skull I sit and wait, pondering
If I'm even alive, as eternity
Stretches out before me, but
Nothing scratches that itch
Waiting for a fabrication to take me in
In the days to come...

I'll still cling
To the bits of shade

I am tired some days,
To hold it all inside,
To keep it all together.
'Cause how long do you think
Can it survive?
After a heart's being broken and shattered?

Sometimes I wish I could leave it all behind
Take away the power I've given people
To hurt me
And maybe then I can be free? 'Cause I've had it enough,
My insecurities **** me up,
Or maybe it's my fear of losing people
Is what I'm afraid of?

I know I ain't easy to love,
I know I'm complicated and ****** up.
But I wonder why do you still hold onto me,
Maybe 'cause you want to;
Or perhaps is it because,
I don't let go easy?

I hope someday I can get out of my misery;
Which I know in this world ain't easy.
I hope someday it won't be this hard,
And I can completely put down my guard.
Let my screams out;
And rest my tired heart.
//tired//
-Neha❤✨

Yes, I

Pitter patter
On a bitter pattern
Of broken memories that I chitter chat about with little matter

And according to the middle latter statement

I'm a little out of place when
I reminisce about that nasty past

That mask... THAT mask.

The one that covered the area where my face belongs


Which matched PERFECTLY with the shoes I would step in **** with

Telling myself:
"My socks are still clean"

Thinking I could use more chemicals than a Sheen to be Pristine
But that's just artificial heat from a blanket with no seams..

I try to tear apart this quilt
Threaded with empty promises in vain

Inside veins that don't pump blood
They pump shame

I'll never be wrapped in this again..

Covered in unfamiliar skin
Wearing a questionable grin

When in the hell did I begin this transformation?

Self surgery.

Murdering false idols!

******* the very fabric of entertainment.

(Yes I can be a ****)

But I rock an S on my chest over the D..

I'm so sick

My thoughts are so vile
They will leave you ill on your lying lips

There is no use in trying to switch
The shattered reality you now have as a dying wish

I said to see,
This shining sea.
A case for all to be,
Of tried and tired.
Creation and tyranny,
Why must we fall and rise?
Why must some end in misery?
Does the sun not shine for all?
Revealing all to see,
The world, a ******* up blue ball.
Full of man’s ire destiny,
Is it of destiny or prophecy?
For man it is both,
A tempest *** of problematic dreams.

Is this all you wanted?
Well, it’s all you’ve left behind.
Is this how it’ll be?
Well, it’s what you’ve left

For me.