My skin is steaming, bubbles forming like scales
As I waste away on my own watch
And there's a churning sensation inside of me
The tides are turning again and again and again
Like in a washing machine.
And I could panic or scream for a bit
Though I'd never be heard
Because help is for the weak, dear
Help is for the weak.
I could wish for calming waters
Or I could make things worse
Like always.
But, truth be told,
I'm a fraud.
My skin is but leather and I'm stuffed
Though I may be alive you'd not know upon first glance
Because I repeat, and repeat like a machine
Without faltering.
All that can be done is dream
For a new path, or a turn for the better
But it's impossible when only in one direction.

Well misery loves
Company and luckily
I am always free

He didn't come from money or a loving home...
He didn't have a nice car or a big house...
He didn't even have a job to be proud of...
            But she loved him anyway.

He remembered her favorite things and spent time with her.
He made her laugh and smile with ease.
He let her be wild and goofy bc she was happy.
            This is why she loved him.

He wasn't classicly handsome...
He wasn't too smart or athletic...
He wasn't even that great in the bedroom.
      But she loved the way he treated her.

He wonders where he went wrong so many times.
Thinks about it when she's away...
His old jokes don't work, she has new favorite things, and she's more mature now.

She left him behind much like a old toy when you become too busy with such things.
He waits for her to notice him again..
But with no money, no family, no good looks or nice things... what would she even come back to?

I hope you are okay
Because I am miserable
Maybe we are the greatest thing to never happen
But will never know

i wish my parents had
loved me enough
or just had enough
good sense

to put me on a diet when
i was nine years old

because now that i'm
older i can say with
certainty that i would
have rather grown up
thinner and slightly
worse for the wear

than grow up the
way i did
(fat)
and be the way i
am now
(fat)

because i ended up
distorted and
unhappy even though
they told me i was lovely

and i would rather
have had me miserable
and skinny rather than
miserable and fat

i only wish they had
told me the truth
instead of letting me
discover for myself

I can't seem to find the words to express how badly distressed I become when I think of you
And I can't seem to understand why I'm losing sleep
I feel lost I am lost and I can't find my way out
I'd like to cry and I'd like to scream and I'd like to let it all go
But I'd suddenly recall a time when it all washed away and I'd remember the way my future was clear as day
And I'd miss the feeling of knowing my next steps
Or the answers to the tests
But I never knew.
And I miss love
I miss being loved and I miss loving life
I miss being happy that I was alive
I miss the days when the sun would shine and the grass was green and the world was kind
Some people would argue these days didn't exist
But they did when I was with you.
They did when I was with you.