My feet dangle in question
if these legs will ever grow
or perhaps find motivation
to make their own tracks again
leaving imprints of obliviousness

Wheels turn, stuck momentarily
a glimpse of looping future
pushing with a heavy burden
footsteps echo hollowly
dragging approaching fate

Will we wither away to nothing
Or will we build a bridge
With tethered hands
Tied to the pursuit,
Grounded by the earth,
Defiant
And determined
To find nirvana
Beyond the wilderness

As the idiot
Eats and swallows the
Poppy flower
So long ago.  
Did he know
That his stupidity
Opened a new world.

As I look at the
Hands fulll of cherries
And the colours
Going back and fourth
I realized that
I didn’t take my **** meds.

Valentine's  Day,
Wife was away,
Partied all night,
Morning, head was light.
Didn't know what took place,
Until month later came face to face,
With a blond girl,
Her words crashed my world,
With my child she was pregnant,
To marry her it was important,
Tension!
So I took action,
I had medical check up and DNA test,
Doctor told me to relax and smiled his best,
Test showed I could never be a father,
More tension, more bother,
I had three kids at home,
They called me daddy and my wife mum.
Tension!Tension!Tension,
If not mine, whose creation?
15/2/2019.

it seeps
under my fingernails into skin
doused in clean! the filth is killed!
then I spit at it.

Demands:

caress my brow in a palm, any warm pocket of flesh
a grandmother’s *****
the spine of a leaf
my dog’s velvet-soft triangle-shaped ear
anything that will let my grief get some rest

sorrow is heavy trash bag to haul

find me a bellhop or a sidewalk construction man
something with biceps and a hardened face. someone who can clean **** up.

please,
sweep
these shards could maim a bystander
         why force one to bleed such an unnecessary truth
wouldn't want to wreck these shiny floors

better to keep it hid, better tighten my lips around it
I mean,
how do -you- feel under these fluorescent lights?
who is studying who?

I understand now my circus of an existence was born
in a tight space
between the exhausted description of my histories
-the official ones- and

these secrets,
the juicy stuff
      
encrypted in me