I'm not sick
but I'm bleeding just the same
I'm not forgotten
but I can't remember my name
I carry a bag of stones
taken from my kidney in claim
I look down on my feet
no feet but guns and they take aim

I look up at the sky
no sky but tree crowns so dense
in front of me, as far as eyes can see
are waves and they build a fence
Faces from within look at me confused
muffled voices tell me I shall be reduced
Just me, my guns and my kidney stones
but I refused

I fell into a pit that looked like my face
They made me swallow my stones
Waking up inside a maze
I think these are my bones

Am I dead
or just insane
my guns are wet
is it all in vain
I regurgitate the stones they fed
spit out blood, the taste got plain

The maze of bones stands aflame
I dry in the heat
I hear a click, my feet to blame
I look down and pang!, I smell burning meat
I open my eyes, push through the frame
only a dream, I'm on the edge of my seat
Looking in the mirror, I fear this isn't the end of this game
I see the bag of stones and my reflection says "repeat".

Something about this world is clockwork.
Just watch people live, see the Earth hurt.
By-standing the impending pain to come.
It's easier hushing the screaming some.
Some say yes when they mean no.
A game of tag against a ghost.
Sometimes we wake back into dreams.
Know that nothing's what it may seem.
Leaving is coming, as nothing is something.
When eating is starving, the silence is fussing.
A tragedy's living in a paradox,
Where does time even go when there isn't a clock?

It's all fun and games until u get stuck
With ur future, bare, trapped by lady luck
And the Russians, as u bleed water slow.
How low can you go?

It's all fun and games until friends become ur end.
With my end in ICU, I C's to follow U
trends.
All alone the end seems full of sorrow.
How low can you go?

It's all fun and games until u realise
That it's the one in the mirror who you truly despise
Changes on changes but ur still broke.
How low can you go?

It's all fun and games until you disappoint
The only thing you passed was a ******* joint
1 pull, 2 pull, hold in blow
How low can you ******* go?

It's all fun and games until you fail
Making mistakes like you're just a day old
Excuses the same old "I didn't know"
How low can you go?

It's all fun and games until you go psychotic
Actions and movements start to seem robotic
When you say it nobody seems to understand though.
How low can you go?

It's all fun and games until you free your mind
From the bliss in ignorance you will find
Frost bite from ignorance like a blissard of snow.
How low can you go?

It's all fun and games until you can't pay the bills
It feels like never-ending steep hills.
Sleep pills make these feels go
How low can you go?

Wasted time
waisted time
way still (ed) time
Weigh distilled wine
waited lines
till when?

My heart is aching without a doubt it's my stomach that twists and turns without warning my face promoting euphoria but only to the naked eye. Everyday I wake up crying without someone there, does anyone here me screaming is anyone out there? I shrug it off hoping that it will get better, but day after day I feel myself floating closer to the sun. My skin is melting as I realize I' m trapped in my own limbo; this depression is eating me from the inside out. Darkness creeping closer to my core as it claws at my soul only to be stopped by the mild feeling of hope that wells up when a glimmer of happiness is seen over a bleek chapparal. Digging my fingernails into my chest I pull out a black mass, slowly pumping nightmare fuel to my brain; squeezing with all my might it bursts. An ink colored substance lingers down my arm as I fall through space, the sun getting farther and farther as I plummet to the earth. Finally I land, unable to move a single muscle I utter to myself. "Help me."

Sometimes I stay awake in the early mornings
Listening to the shower of sound that comes from the wind tossing through the trees
And wish that at this hour, other things kept my company
The way memories do

Of your hand on my hip, bunching my pajamas in the ball of your fist
Taking a deep breath
And finally
Moving away
With your breath still warm on my lips
Murmuring in tired song about your intentions
About our choices

"What are we going to do?"
"Nothing."