By living alone i am escaping a haunted house. to leave is to be spat out undigested, a bone picked clean of meat but spared the marrow. it was always me who refused to be easily swallowed. it was always you who hated that.
We both know this haunting didn’t seep out from the walls, it was set in every room. (you made sure of that.) in such a space, articles of comfort are more unpleasant than bare walls - far worse than nothingness, they are marks of you. it is true you have built a home. but it is not my home.
Your haunting is pristine, white walls and tasteful furniture. beautiful but unwilling to be dwelt in. in polished mirrors, everyone is dirt. at least a gutted, rotting place could have been somewhere someone like me was loved, some long time ago. even claimed by mould and time such a house is less of a haunting than any space shared with you. at least i can imagine those crumbling walls as having once been the pillars of a life. at least among them i am clean.
if you are a leech, i am water, part of blood but never enough, you consume more than i alone can give you. you consume more than i would part with, even if i could.
if a home with you is a haunting, a house alone is a half dug grave.
but at least theres work left to do.
at least i wont be rotting alongside you.

Let me tell you the reason
why I fell for you...

I have never met anyone
who understands me
as much as you do.
The overthinking, the horror,
the darkness inside me,
the teardrops for no reason.
My love for sadness,
longing for it on my good days
and wanting to die for it
on my bad days
then longing for it again
and again, and again.

The Bargain

I met darkness in a quiet place
It sought to bless me with its grace

With a voice so low so sweet and small
I was almost tempted when it called

It offered wealth beyond compare
My every wish if I should dare

To take a chance and perhaps stay
But lose myself along the way

Stifling power with mindless rage
My foes before me crushed and slain

A vengeful promise mine to keep
To let darkness reign all while I sleep

But at what cost I failed to ask
What devil hid in that dark mask?

The reward for vengeance wealth and fame
A soul surrendered …no one to blame

I met  darkness in a quiet place
It sought to trick me with its grace

With a voice so low so sweet and small
I felt temptation when it called

REA '19
(Excerpt from a WIP)

Listen to the words
Wind whispers in your ear
Full moon is here again
Be quiet - they are near

Don't let them hear you
Maybe they'll go away
But pictures in your mind -
They stay

And darkness knows
Your every move

The creatures dancing in the night
Spiders in the corners
Hiding from the light