When you fall in love for the first time
You won’t even know it’s happening
The dancing streets, heels against cobblestones
The glow of the lampposts
Things you wouldn’t even whisper
You are now ready to exclaim
The whole world is spinning and yet
It is perfectly still
In this great, big universe
It is just two sets of eyes
And the landmarks we created

The park benches where we were honest for the first time
Where you made sure i was okay before we got up
The truth can do that to you -
Knock the wind out of your sails

Or the first time we touched each other on purpose
I linked your arm with mine
And i could feel the stars burning above us
And the moon sneaking a glance
As we ‘forgot’ all about it
And you walked me home

The first time i went to that pizza place
I only joined you because we had things to discuss
Not for your company, why of course not
With every laugh
It became harder to think of a reason that i hated you in the first place

I thought only  i experienced the clock ticking slower
Every second you weren’t with me
But the calls and the texts
And the exasperated “where were you”s put that all to rest

So i made the leap
And served my heart on a silver platter
Full, beating and red
And i watched you watch it beat blue and gasp

But  now time doesn’t seem to pass at all when we’re together
And everytime we’re alone we wait for someone to join us;
our desperate eyes search, pleading with anyone to end our suffering
I watch you when i used to run to you
And i miss you when i see you every single day

I love you
But i can’t do this anymore
We can’t even pretend to be friends properly
I remember what you said
Believe me, every word
But I felt us that night
We saw each other for the first time
I don’t think I’ve ever had that with anyone
And despite what you say
I don’t think you have either

Strangers think we’re in love
Your friends and my friends
Steal glances every time we look at each other
We weren’t alone
It felt like it was just us
But everyone got to witness
The way we were
I didn’t stop smiling for three months

I miss you
I miss your honesty
I was trying to break down a wall
And you threw open the gates
Now i can’t even see the wall anymore

I’m on the outside looking in
Losing what we had was hard enough
I wasn’t prepared to lose you as a friend
I don’t think i’ll ever be
but we haven’t been friends for ages
So who are we kidding
I knew this didn’t need a dramatic close
You don’t need me to take a bow

So I was ready to watch you from afar
Having you in my rearview was better than not having you at all
But just as I take my first breaths
You hook yourself on
And I have to learn all over again

I refuse to do this anymore
We are not friends
You didn’t have to admit anything because i wasn’t prepared to lose you
But it’s time
For this ship to sail
You are losing me.

such an exhilarating phenomenon presents itself tonight
for the first time in so long
the curtain to the inner sanctum has been pulled askew
and in steps: you.
I hope I will not come to rue the moment
that led me to this start
though my intuition tells me that I am safe
with you in my heart.

Hello!

These are my thoughts, I guess,
A pause so I have a moment to digress...
To ingest,
and address,
that we're blessed,
but obsessed,
with the best,
without rest,
Always have the right answer because life is a test.
Surely this must be some form of jest.

A lie? Okay, tell me why.
Hmm. Okay. Listen to the Rhye.
or Rhyme?

Stillness brings a sense of interlude
Contemplate what will be left as residue
When Chaos defines what's the norm,
and Peace is overdue
Attempting to reconcile
what's old and new...
What a view.

Our actions are crude.
personality that's ****,
treated as askew,
spreading bitter news,
pretend we have the clues,
for a world that's filled with the blues?

What a truth...
And still,
we have to worry about
the pearly gates interview?
What a zoo.

Let me not assume,
Is this you?

Boards, first cause, by-laws, cars, mars, spas, bourgeoise, laws, closed doors, outlaws, applause, paws, claws, jaws, gnaws, gauze, grandma bawls, falls, withdraws, in-laws, clause, chainsaws, bedstraws, grandpa roars, draws, broken doors, floors, gauze, self-applause, laws, clause, outlaws, closed metal door, applause.
I pause.
Yours?

How are you?

Free use,
I take it, it's from the abuse
And how it plays on your psyche
It's beyond me
Cause you talk
But I don't know, if honestly.
I know you hurt,
I love you.

I wanted to be so **** beautiful
I wanted nature to fall to my feet
I wanted the mountains to bow
I wanted the trees to weep for the love of me

I wanted to charm the dumbest of boys
I wanted to tempt the strongest of men
I wanted to break thousands of hearts
I wanted them to wake screaming my name

I wanted to be everyone's wildest daydream
I'd play my game without a fault
I'd fulfill my role to perfection: be it
Angel or *****, beggar or queen,
I'd be whatever they needed me to be
And when they relied on me the most
I would leave without a trace, without remorse

Because then, I would never be the one to wait,
The one to cry to sleep each day, I'd
Never be rejected, but keep them staring
At the blankness I'd leave behind me

(As a sidetone:
There are fantasies I'd never dare project into words
Thoughts I've buried deep within my soul,
But, believe me,
This might be the most honest poem I ever wrote).

Why does sin linger at my porch
as if I know not what it brings...
Destruction has eyes of fury
in the eyes, it stares me down

My door swings open at the wind of malice
but shuts at the remorse of guilt
Ashamed of my roots, my being is questioned

do I deserve it?
No, How dare I...

I am not to feel as if I deserve, but to feel out of gratitude
to push on as if my breathe was to go a top everest
longing for the day of ever rest with my Father

I beg, do not scorch me
I am wanting to diverge,
Though my home has a porch of dirt that snaps at my ankle while I escape
my door shuts...

It's too late
evil has entered,

we are back at the start.

My cry is loud Lord
My wailing is a top the waves
I know you hear me, I know