In apple growing-warmth,
I found oceans between eyelashes and Pacific air.

Ligamented with smoke, skeleton hands crafted cigarettes of honey and curling floral sweetness.

For soft-haired royalty, I bowed my heart and washed my skin in space and rainy wishes.

I drowned myself in polish remover, to show the stripped beauty of love and life
to a sun who lives off alcohol and notions of wouldn't it be nice?

But I, the noiseless patient spider,
who has flung gossamer after thread,
am reaching for nothing but an earth flower,
One who I thought loved me,
or at least that’s what she said.
((one who sees through rose-pink eyeglasses,
and speaks in feathered song.))

Still, I sleep well under starless skies,
where urban northern lights burn the dark,
charred there by city windows and boundless passing cars.

Here, I wrap myself in a cloth galaxy,
and I paint the sun with blackberry juice,
trading gold and diamonds for the simple hope
that someone might live up to you.

Seven EIGHT poor six
Run away dear five

Dear Dais,
Mom and dad aren’t together anymore. I know you won’t believe it because I still don’t. It wasn’t your fault. Dad just did some stupid things. And it wasn’t mom‘s fault, she gave him enough chances. Right now you’re doing okay. You’re 17 now and graduation is right around the corner. It’s taken you three high schools and lots of tears to finish, but you’re going to make it. You’re an aunt now even though you really see your nephew. You’re 2 & 1/2 years clean. That means you no longer do drugs, drink, and stay out too late with boys. You’ve been very very sad at times, sometimes to the point where you would draw on your arms with something sharp. You stopped that. At one point you wouldn’t eat. You got over that. You finally let God into your life. You let boys and fake friends hurt you but now you’re stronger than them. You still get sad sometimes, but you’ve came a long way. I’m proud of you. I’m proud. You might not understand right now, but one day you will. Don’t try so hard to grow up, because I’d give anything just to be a kid for a day. Life is hard, but through everything to come, you will make it through. You will go through a lot, more than you thought. But you won’t give up because you’re much stronger than any superhero there ever was. Stay strong girl.
~ Daisy Rae
11-13-17

no matter how hard i try

how many times i wash my hands

how many times i check the expiration date

how many times i knock on wood

                    five times five

repeat

                    five times five

repeat

                    five times five

repeat

                five times five
          
                             five times five...

Dear Tristan,

          How is it you constantly tell the truth to others,
          But you always lie to yourself?

One, one, one,
Time to have some fun.
Two, two, two,
No need to subdue.
Three, three, three,
Now you'll never be free.
Four, four, four,
Your pain I'll ignore.
Five, five, five,
STOP BEING ALIVE

Six boys in blue are walking by,
Find a child who'll do or die.
Then one dies, to feed the flies,
They were caught off by surprise.
Five boys in blue are walking by,
With a child who cannot cry,
Then one dies, to feed the flies,
He looks into the flaming skies.
Four boys in blue are walking by,
They use the child to petrify,
Then one dies, to feed the flies,
Boys in blue say their goodbyes.
Three boys in blue are walking by,
Use the child to horrify,
Then one dies, to feed the flies,
Pumping lead into both eyes.
Two boys in blue are walking by,
They shoot the red boys, eye for eye,
Then one dies to feed the flies,
Screaming just to end their lives.
A boy in blue is walking by,
He knows they're coming, says goodbye.
Then he dies, to feed the flies,
The child ends him to terrorize.

I am One,
My god is the sun.
One and two,
Now I hate you.
One, two, three,
A killing spree.
One, two, three, four,
I like this one, she's my *****.
One, two, three, four, five,
Very few of us survive.
One, two, three, four, five, six,
Maybe it's cuz you're ******* ******.
One, two, three, four, five, six seven,
Each a sin which keeps me from heaven.