The real reason I don't want to grow up?
Yes, the bills, the responsibility.
But the fear, the fear of turning out just like
Everyone else did.

They tell me
"Don't grow old."
They say
"I'd rather **** myself than live this way, I did everything wrong."
Well I hear that.
I don't want to grow old because
I don't want to live like that anymore.

I've grown this obsession with doing
Everything the exact opposite than
What they did
So I don't go down their way.

It hurts,
When family holds you,
Looks you in your eyes,
And tells you they want to die.
And nothing I could do
Could suffice that pain
Or price

someone once told me
you’re no good for me
that we shouldn’t hold onto
something not guaranteed
back then i didn’t believe them
but now i know
we cant grow
-
now i’m faded
sitting in my bathroom
wishing it was you that would come back soon
thinking bout the good times
that are
tangled in these vines in my mind
contemplating suicide
waiting for the sunrise
to save me from taking my own life

yesterdays
             stumbles,
buried.
        trodden
                  into shore,        
remain
   just              
       footprints.

I'm pouring out my heart
For what I cannot afford.
No, I spent tokens on a cheap
Pair of happiness
For about an hour,
30 minutes to kick in.
Yeah my tokens were stolen,
My hands,
Remain broken.
My tongue still tied
And my mind remains fried.

Jumping caterpillars
Mindless zombie killers
Information out the ear
Just settle down, have a beer.

We need none of this
Politicians take the ****
Citizens all full of fear
Just settle down, have a beer.

Dim-lit screens of mind control
Make your feeble mind go dull
Your car, you no longer steer
Just settle down, have a beer.

Your words are limited to your stance
Tell me now, who wears your pants
You no longer spin your gear
Just settle down, have a beer.

A tiny ant inside a hive
Believe in instant revive
While your loves shed the tear
Just settle down, have a beer.

Go along little circus clown
Believe what you hear around
Besides, what is there to fear?
Just settle down, have a beer.

We hate the pills the we're prescribed,
But love the ones that get us high.

One year ago exactly,
In the moment I relapsed faster
Than how fast I was running from myself.

It had been about a year too
Before I closed the door on
Hoping to have grown.

I was sent away
And blamed for that.
They said "You said the right things
And did this on purpose"
Well I can't say I did that,
But I can say I finally opened up
And asked for help
And this is what I got for that.

Now everytime I smell
The smell of tide detergent
And see that color green
On the meridian scrubs
I flinch and stop breathing.

I wish I never opened up,
I wish I never asked for help
Cause now the shackles on my brain are getting heavier in that section.

But it showed me a new perspective,
Didn't get the help I was wishing for
But I grew older, wiser, and nicer.
Now I'm a fighter for the kids like me
So I guess I have grown a little.

Oh, this long road seize no end.
Should I sue the contractor?