I want to be mysterious
I want to be the kind of girl
who leaves pieces of herself
with different people, all around the world
so that no one knows her full story
but it is all there
for some potential dedicated soul to discover.

I want to be a puzzle
that everyone thinks they have figured out
and all I do is smirk
because they have no idea
what they're talking about.

I want my life to seem effortless
my world falls gracefully into place around me
to the wonder of everyone else
but all according to my plan.


But that is not me.


I love fiercely, and with reckless abandon.
I tell the world my story in hopes that
someone will care enough about it
to stick around to watch the rest of it to play out.

I care. Deeply. About a lot of things.
So much so that it hurts.

I stop to watch squirrels munch on their dinner
and would much rather talk to a child about nothing at all
than have an adult conversation.

I am not mysterious. I am no puzzle. Nothing about me is effortless.
I am an open book with her heart on her sleeve
yearning and searching for true human connection
somewhere in this vast cold expanse.

But what's so wrong with that?

I See a picture,
Dear with color bright.
Its whimsical strokes,
A smooth, but lovely, Sight.

I Smell the paint,
A sense not faded yet.
Like prints left exposed,
With the trail's fine Scent.

But underestimated, the Tool,
And ability to express
The ideas my head
Conjures as a coordinated mess.

Yes, the paintbrush,
Much simpler than I,
Yet it works its hardest,
While I don't even try.

Say
y e s...
Effortless.

I believe we all have someone destined to be with us...
I believe in destiny...
Showing love, affection and giving attention to my soulmate will be effortless, I believe...
Not just for few months or a year like other relationships we've had, but, forever...
Pure happiness...
Pure love...
Look at someone and all my body and soul scream "I love you" "I love everything about you, the flaws too"
Not just for a year or two... But, forever...
I believe that the person destined to be with me will love me for who I am...
And the things the others told me to change? Will make my soulmate love me more...
Love and be loved for long long years and still feel like we're dating for a week.
Yes, I believe in that and I hope I'm not being naive.

Everything that I complain about isn't even that ugly. Sometimes things **** a little but I never let it consume me.
Some things are simply a riddle and you just move on.
You come to know what feelings are the easiest and I've always found being happy quite effortless.
Being upset is a chore.
Don't stress,
There's always more.