I have long desired a night undisturbed
full of sleep and coherent dreams
but that the sun arrives faster than light's speed
leaves me wondering
if there is ever an end to the war
I battle throughout weeks, months,
and years and years on end
After all I am easy to bend
like a daisy at the hand of storm
sways, unyielding, entrusting the wild current
of passion that breaks her back
I strike a match to see with blind eyes
how far this night, intemperate, will extend
And who shall have removed my footprints
when dawn breaks to swallow
every secret I whispered to this dusty road
and crushed beneath my feet
They say day is a neat deceit
for those who believe black is evil
and I hardly think it untrue
with stars ****** off their shine
to magnify the glory of darkness
when my body hits the matress
I can feel it quite as it is, darkness
but in no shade of beauty or grace
as if I never had any stars to sacrifice
with love their inborn proclivity
there indeed is no sincerity
in the way I am deaf to the sound of dark
A Beethoven masterpiece, the starry night
Such starless of a night this life has become
Or is it that life is still there?
handsome and fair, with his head in clouds?
My pinstriped eyes fail to glimpse in a crowd
the warmth and glow of this flame
of dark, this grand grand enchantress
Behind prison bars the war goes on
with no light to clear the mess...

and it's not something we would ever do sober
      but when we're here, slightly warmer than average, and you let go of me
i find myself wishing that it wasn't over,
     quite so soon.
here i am, surrounded, surrounded by beautiful women. so many of them stir me up inside and make me foolish, and full of folly.
and yet,
     somehow,
still, even now,
i
     kind of
just
     want
you.

cups of
earl gray,
cans on cans
on cans of
lukewarm beer;

to the squeals
of my guitar,
I sustain

a broken back/
a liquid diet.

pull it high over my head
and tell it to begin.
I’d rather be trapped
in the raptures
safety net,
filled with feelings of regret
and substances I didn't neglect.

And so I drank her.
A high ball glass of seduction
Shaken with whiskey lips
Wide hips
Sugar rim
Sin and forgiveness.
I drank her blind
And ordered another.

i'm lying in bed,
floating.
i'm floating!

everything swirls, curls, stirrs
ah, the earth is rotating
rotating
rotating
rotating...

i find next to me
god and satan, dark, **** satan, smoking.
god, gleaming, seems to squint his eyes at me
"Relax", said satan and passed the cigarette to god

drunk, I giggle at god
"you really ****** up life", i note
and then pass out

everyone says they remember
the first time ... (fill in the blank with a bad memory)
I don't remember the first time
my daddy called me a manipulative *****, or a little ****
I don't remember the first time
I realized he was an alcoholic
I don't remember when I first felt pity for him
I do remember the first time
I held him as he cried

the circle keeps spinning
the cycle keeps coming
when will this ride end

I love my dad.

it was a bottle or two,
downed, you know,

by this grave, grave "poetic hen."

birthing eggs of nothing,

words that'll scroll up in a thousand screens

like yours, like mine,

we share, you and I,
a great,
a very great,
nothing.

keep this,
you.

In this loneliness,
I've missed you.