A fruit may look beautiful yet taste bitter
A fruit may look ugly yet have a taste to make you reconsider
A fruit may look ugly yet taste the sweetest
A fruit may look beautiful yet taste the weakest
~20/3/21

Assume what you will of me
Stooped readily to clear your debris
Palms redly scoured of identity
Dipped in and out of buckets
Craggy with pervasive patterns
That spell the same words
Uninteresting,
Invisible
No more than the sum of a bubble
Popped into nothingness.
Wiped off, wiped away from thought
As easy as I remove stains.

See what you will in me;
Waste of ability,
All paralysed potential
Settling lazily
Into that dreary pit of existance.
There will be no insistance for judgement
On my part.
My essence remains in my chest,
Treasured yet and shone
For those who care to value it.
For their delicate hands it will always open
Because it has never been locked.

i must give you a full physical exam
to fully grasp my prognosis and plan
of treatment for you... dont be afraid
i feel confident, no need to debate
i can satisfy
and gratify
your pre-dic-ament
in the richest succulent

as a specialist, to some degree
my healing hands work expertly
but to receive full and complete treatment
you must partake my honey rather frequent
for a better plan of action
i require a full body transfusion
a chemical mixture of center fuses
a delicate blending of our juices
this may require several procedures
over time it provides many features
healing properties of your most vital *****
however worth it, even if, it cost a fortune
to this a can guarantee success
but first you must fully undress

i work with energy transference
your help required for successful convergence
of the best possible results
between two consenting adults

bartering is certainly a viable option
for your long term medical condition
providing equal services for each other
helps maintain balance to one another

Good days
Bad days
Who decides them?
No one really knows what is considered
A bad or good day
It changes with each person
Everyone is a different person
How can you focus on what you see?
Have you ever thought about
What happens behind the scenes?
Hidden, Fake,
I've written poems with these names
And many other names like these
All attributed to the behind the scenes
People judge others' lives based on
What they see
No one cares about the unseen
The late nights
The dark fights
All they see is your "whining"
Or your "laziness"
Not how much effort is put into being alive
The resistance of the strong power of self-harm
Can you people wake up?
Please just realize there are people with serious problems
Some could result in danger
And toxic habits
What would you do if everyone made your "bad day" hell
Where it was so dreadful you didn't want to go anywhere
And you just wanted to end it all

You may think I'm lying
just seeking attention
This condition I have not known to many
until I tell them
People scoff at me and say yeah right
or just stay silent  not believing a word I have said
But my condition is real
I can assure you that
I did not make it up for my enjoyment or yours
I don't like when people test me on what I can and can not handle
What triggers me and what does not
Sure my triggers are uncommon
But that doesn't mean they aren't valid
I dislike the need of having to puke and passing out because someone couldn't keep their mouth shut
I know everyone has the freedom of Speech but please don't look at me like my condition is invalid because you have never heard of it

You may not approve
of what I do,
My words may not
Seem perfect to you.
But trust me
I do feel the same.
Being perfect was never my aim.
I WRITE TO— CONCEAL EMOTIONS NOT TO ATTRACT FAME.

Don't judge a book by it's cover
The saying is true
Don't judge me till you know me
Or know what I've been through

This book you judge
Holds more than you see
Don't just react
Based on what you feel

I've experienced a lot of things
Both good and bad
Some made me happy :)
Most made me sad :(

I've let people get to me
People that don't really matter
But I believe
It will all turn out for the better

They say people's experiences make up their characters
Some can be changed, others cannot
It all depends
On how deep you've gotten

I've gone really deep
And don't know how to get out
So if you want to help me
Pray for me, love me
But don't judge me

My hurtling words of fire
A comforting flame in your ire
A useless sting of pointless banter
In which you let out a heartless laughter

Your mirth a travesty of joy
For inside you feel sick and coy
That boastful persona of yours
A swollen mask of horrid boars

For you are but a gnat
An annoyance in my gut
A perfect example of a lie
In which your feelings you deny

A big hulking menace you are
I am a bee prepared for war
'Coz even the small venom may suffice
To take down a bullying giant thrice

For you are nothing but an anomaly
A ******* of sacred sympathy
A mutation of kindness and charity
An unloved kid raised in brutal anarchy

So when this war fades out
And we both are cold out
I hope that we can make and fill
The love we both didn't get to feel

For you see we are but humans
Of the same species of grand
A being of futile feelings
Of uncontrollable emotions we are drowning