Why did you bring me to earth?
To break my soul,
Stamp on my heart,
And crush my dreams?

Why don't you believe in your own daughter?
Just put her down,
Break her spirit,
Even make her lose her faith...
In herself, everything and everyone around her?

Why will you let your own flesh and blood,
Child,
Family,
Be discouraged,
Sad,
Insecure,
By you?

What are you?
What are you really?
Family don't do that,
You're not my family any more.

You don't deserve to be called my mother,
You're nothing more than a dreamcrusher...

I had a light in me
It shone so bright that people could see what was inside
I talked about things that I loved religiously
And I clearly knew what I wanted to do

I did not give two *****
About what anyone thought of my work
Until I found myself wanting recognition
I asked people to tell me what was good and what was bad

I saw no wrong in that
Neither did they
Until I realized that I craved for compliments
I craved the praise

It was not for bad intentions
I wanted to get better
I wanted to be heard
I wanted the world to know me

But slowly, I became obsessed
I started relying on people
I relied on them to tell me my work is good
While I no longer believed in myself

The more they told me it was not good enough;
That I was not good enough
My light started to dim
And discouragement was staring me right in the face

I spent so long minding what everyone else thought of me
That I forgot the reason I was doing what I was doing
I listened to what everybody wanted me to do
I pushed aside the things that I wanted to do for myself

The minutes leak away
I just needed you to stay
I'm tired of sculpting gifts for you
Then you just shatter them on the ground
The pieces of me disrupt your path
I hope that you can flicker enough light to make it through the night
I would tell you to walk slow
Take your time
Be careful not to cut yourself
But you won't listen to me
So ignore my shards and run through the night to your other options
I'm so incomplete
Maybe that's why no one ever stays
I didn't want you to stay anyways
I have a room full of art that I'm too scared to share
Because it will end up scattered all over the floor without a care
You taught me that
Thanks for being a good teacher
Now I know that I'm not going to light anyone's way, I can't
You threw me away
I won't keep handing you my pieces
Plaster can't fix all of this
Flicker your way through life without me
It's better like that
I guess this is goodbye

These three years are a bleached,
bitterly bluegray frozen, tundra-
full of shallow graves,
where I have buried my companions,
dreams,
and thin ice,
traveled with careful steps,
cherished occasional fires,
to warm the permafrost around my heart,
I follow ghosts made of frost,
who seldom speak,
but never fail to remind me that I am lost.

To feel your hand in my hand,
Your words in my ear,
Your heart beneath my palm--
I would give anything.

I picture your soft voice
Chasing away the sadness
And lending hope to my broken heart.
My world feels empty,
My forces lacking.
How am I to tackle this war
With no one on my side?

True--
My God is loving;
He is strong and compassionate.
I know that in him,
I cannot fail.

But staying ahead of failure
Is not the same as finding success.
If I am to succeed,
This emptiness must be filled.
I need strength beside me,
As well as within me.

I need a hand to hold,
And a smile to return.
Why did God give you to me,
Only to let the distance keep you from me?

Do you see me?
Explain myself again?
Why can't we have a resume for our Being?
No explanation necessary.
Reader do you understand?
I say hello, they say hi,
Then the beats of silence, can I hide?
Please Lord I am in need of a best friend.
I miss her, could she miss me?
She knew me when,
Probably would not recognize the old Friend.
Nobody can take her place,
I miss that funny face.
But I am in need,
Lost tears not seen.
Look forward?
My Father I am so discouraged,
Don't want to be alone.

Today I feel so small. - Minuscule
As if a puff of smoke,
a dandy-lion seed,
that will never roar.

The last week has been,
crumbling not good,
not like cakes or sweet tastes,
but internally breaking,
and waste.

I feel so small in my faith,
and my life. I feel like Joseph,
in the dungeon of the king,
waiting for some news to unfold,
for a dream,
to be,
a key,
for someone to unearth it-
to unlocking my purpose.
For someone to whisper,
“You’re worth it.”
-D. Montgomery 2015

It's called the land of equal opportunity
For who?
If you're hair isn't processed, you're already eliminated
You already failed the test
They think their texture is the best
But don't let that discourage you
Because they don't know how beautiful it is to be...