I try not to cry but sometimes my vision is clouded with tears as they start chasing each other down my face.
They fall to my chest playing in a pool of emotions.
I cant contain them anymore.

I think you'll be gone in a matter of time
Not entirely disappearing, part of you will still remain
You'll travel to another country and meet new people
To soon forget about who I am
And I keep telling you 'I love you'
Maybe you can find your destination in my words
I don't think you will
But I keep hoping that one day you'll say 'I love you' before I do
Before I make you to
You are the first male I really trust
The first one I truly love
And my heart will break when you go away
It will shatter and collapse and create a tiny pile of broken pieces
That'll be me for the next few years
I will not tell you this
I refuse to tell you this
Because I, I love you

As the midnight snows
my desire to be
another's grows
to be as beautiful
as a rose
seems to be my new pose
I'll sit here waiting
for my love, at last, to show
that true love is not just something that I suppose

I ponder on the fictional love
that splatters on the television
as my tears spill because I will never
experience that love
I am not in a movie

To dance the night away
is my new favorite thing
the flashing lights, the whisky in my breath  
and the man attempting to dance
all excite me
I escape into the night
and I forget the truth
I never want to leave
You will find me at the club, now every single week

My poetry is calamity !
I wish I didn't have to write
I wish I didn't have the sight
I wish I didn't see the fight
And that's why I write !
My poetry is despair
I pen my greatest thoughts when I'm running out of air
I can pull lightening out of a bottle and hold it in my hand when I'm facing fear.
My poetry is anger
In the trenches
teeth clinched, face covered in blood
Enemies closing in on me. Fight or flight!
Adrenaline a gatling,  will I fight or will I run?
God didnt give me wings that work
But is the answer the gun?
My poetry is war
Mankind hath not shown me an answer
The bible gives me freedom yes but before the son of man comes back will I see a cure ?
My poetry is the blood pumping through my veins, the electricity running down my spine
My poetry is the cold, calculated sting of a viper, coiled and ready to strike.
I don't write because I want to
I don't write because I feel to
I write because my only defense to a world so cold
Is the truth so bold
I write because crying about the world would send me to an early grave.
I write to inspire you to follow and yourself you might save.
I write because my days are numbered and because its freedom I crave.