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I look into the dark abyss of thoughts
Questions
They multiply in this endless abyss
The end is near
I want it
At the same time I am trembling with fear
I rub my eyes to look clearly
But I do not understand anything
A black, boundless abyss
Getting closer to me
It deepens
It devours me
It penetrates through me
I open my mouth to shout
But I spit out the darkness out of my mouth
Pain mixed with despair
Tears mixed with blood
Nothing stops
And suddenly
Black is pouring out of my eyes
So deep
So beautiful
So calm
I do not understand it
I am still waiting for this end
But this abyss gives me a chance
A chance to escape
So what should I do?
https://justfeelingsandthinking.blogspot.com/?m=1
Johnny walker Nov 30
Interesting theory of the world turned full circle back to the beginning of time to start all
over
Would we do everything
In life just the same as before, my guess yes probably we
would
Another Interesting thought given a chance would we do It all over again just as before
Anna Grace Nov 22
Worn out withered leaves
Narrate a story of surviving
Till the winter blows it away

The frozen shards of ice
Piercing a beating heart
Bleeding the last ounce of
Hopefulness

(C) Anna_Grace 2018
I want to think
That my love had no chance
Or else I'll never stop wondering
I want to believe
You wouldn't ever fall for me
And we'd have nothing
But a pain filled ending
I want to see your eyes filled with her
Like I looked at yours so lovingly
So I can find nothing but pain in you
And find happiness elsewhere willingly
Johnny walker Nov 22
How strange my path
through life has been
to all the places and
all I've seen, fate that bought Helen I together with a chance
meeting
But not for that one
chance probably never would have ever met
and of this never have come to
be
But for fate a chance meeting all this never would been
Her beguile
His trial
Her smile
The beginning
The ending
Cycling
Pushing and pulling
Her *****
Wraps around my
Soul
Leader of
Deception and love
Failure of empathy
I’m ensnared
If I flip a coin and it lands on tails,
I'll tell you why I did it.

tails, I'll tell you why I felt like I wasn't enough anymore.
tails, I'll tell you how afraid I was of being erased
tails, I'll tell you how much I wanted it to be you

and if it were to land on heads,
I'd stay silent
Unsaid words and how much pain it can inflict on one's self
Jordan Ray Nov 15
I had a chance to talk to you again,
A chance to finally try my best to make amends,
A real chance to make amends

But you were crying almost every night,
'Cause you missed his love, but didn't miss mine,
I prayed to ***, to let me change your mind

You were so hurt by everything I'd done,
All you thought to do was turn and run,
How I wish I hadn't let you down

-------------------

Is there a *** above?
Watching over us,
Watching me fall,
So far i can't feel.
Is there such thing as love?
Or is it all made up,
I fall down,
There's only one way out

Your love
YOUR LOVE missing chance hope gone wish
J A Perkins Nov 15
I can hardly imagine the beauty, now,
I saw looking down from Childhood Hill.
Just because I'm not looking down
doesn't mean it's not beautiful, even still.
It's just out of reach
from where I've taken my stance
and to make it back up is a downhill chance.
So many nights I wasted, wasted.
Not like the gamblers, though.
I wanted to, but they really chased it.
I just pretended to, but cared more than
I wanted to admit
about ending up in a bottomless pit.
They were much too trashed
to know the depth of the cess pool
or who they splashed.
I was too afraid to flee the familiar feel
I'd always known atop Childhood Hill -
A mountain that doesn't have to be
climbed as long as we never fall from it's flat.
But I came sliding down as if the ground
were made of ice or something like that.
Barreling down to my grave with my
hands in the air - announcing my arrival
And spitting at casualties along the way;
making light of their happenchance survival.
And they shook their heads.
And they threw their dirt.
Some of them wanted to see me hit Rock Bottom
just to know their hurt.
Some of them wanted me to stop, but changed
their minds when they saw my arrogance.
I'm not as bitter toward them.
And some of them, the ones I hurt the most,
watched in horror when I upped my dose.
Both my sanity and serenity in hand, I slid.
Both of which I lost... I did.  
Then I hit the ground and did I hit hard?
I hit so ******* the ground beneath,
I'm still spitting fragments of my busted teeth.
Painful memories of addiction and the likes
Material things don’t entice me
Empty promises don’t  count as a remedy
Flowery words are pleasing to the ear
With apparent intentions clear

Is this just an infatuation?
An effect of my subtle imagination
This relentles game of tug of war
How I wish it wouldn’t end up in a scar

All I know is that I’m tired of this dance
Might as well give us a chance?
You have gone way past this armour
Consistency, that is all I am asking for
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