Thank you for Matching the Tinder Call Center. My name is Nick and I will be helping you with your order today. And your name is?

Hi, (Tinder Match). I'm so glad you called because you do qualify as one of the first 100 people I find attractive!
So Where are you from?

Oh Wow, I've never been there, you ever Been to Portland Maine?

No? Well look at that, I guess we've never been too each others places before.
Haha.
Looks like we have something in common.

What was it on my profile that got you interested in swiping right?
Oh I see, you liked the beard and
my addiction to Netflix.

How long have you been interested in that?
Wow that's a long time.
you really enjoyed the Office.

What else have you tried to build a good relationship?
Yeah, that must be frustrating.
They seem like a real bad guy.

What's the worst part about dealing with that?
I see, that must be really hard.

Tell me a little bit about why it's so important for you to do something about this now; it's a little different for everyone.

I see, you can't love anymore because he broke your heart.
You don't want anything serious right now.

Do you prefer coffee or tea?
you're right, Yerba Mate is fantastic with maple syrup.

What's your favorite meal of the day?
Yeah, breakfast is amazing.

What kind of music do you like?
Twenty One Pilots saved your life? that's Unbelievable.

what does your bedroom look like?
Covered in artwork and paper lanerns?

You know, (tinder match). I can't wait for you to start seeing me, and feeling Happy.

As my profile states,
I am a Geeky, Confident, Charismatic Optimist who likes to wake up next to people, Watch Netflix, and sing to himself almost always.
And that sounds great doesn't it?

Just imagine how wonderful it will feel when you're able to Sit down in Dobra tea. Pass back and fourth our Yerbe Matte Ahumado.
Then go belt out lyrics to Twenty One Pilots in my car on the way back to your place,
have amazing *** under your paper lanterns and wake up the next day to me making you breakfast.
And THAT'S really why you swiped right today, isn't it (Tinder match)?

Excellent! Let's get you started!

As you heard, I've put together a Special Date, with the free Tea. A serenade and car ride. And an extra free second date when you try this First One for just your body. Plus, since you're one of the people I find attractive, I'm gonna throw in a Third date. so you get three, for the price of one! And remember that dating me is risk-free because it's backed by my 30-day Text you back guarentee.
So what's the best number I can reach you at?

I understand your hesitation, (tinder match). When we first started talking you had said you'd been dealing with bad relationships for a long time right? Once you start seeing me you'll see an increase in happiness within the first two dates. And if you never have to worry about being sad again, you'd say it was worth trying wouldn't you?
Right! So what's your snapchat username?

Perfect, and your Cell phone number?
Alright, and a day you're free?
And what's a good time to meet?

Awesome, okay (Tinder Match). And I'm also told to inform you of our special super saver package today. You'll get to go out on a date with me, and my friend Sally for the same low price of just your body. Imagine what it'd be like experiencing the both of us at the same time! Scientists have proven that polyamorous relationships are more happy, more healthy, and result in less overall stress. Which is really what you're looking for isn't it?

Great so I'll just have her tag along alright?

Perfect.
Thank you very much and just to confirm, I'll see you on Wednesday at 12:00pm at Dobra Tea, alright?
Alright have a nice day (Tinder Match.)
Buh bye.

I like letters because the act of letter writing involves dedicating my time,
And you have received 2 of the 4 letters written of mine,
2/4 is 50%, and 50 percent's majority.

If we were in business together you'd have 50% of the company,
And majority rules, you see.

But in this case I'm only tenaciously in love with you,
So you receive 50% percent of my time, 50% of my attention, and 50% percent of my heart,
the majority of my equity.

I never gave you the remaining 50%,
But you did steal it from the start,
Love of my life, you own my only heart

Everytime
some health ****
tells me smoking
will take ten years
off my life,
I remember my mother
and grandfather
both in their eighties
and their last
ten years of misery,
decline and dementia,
smile, light another
and think
how wise I am.

Struggling to catch my breath
as the corporate noose tightens
with every mundane task flung my way

Slowly losing my contentment
with this poor disguise of slavery

Suffering alone in silence
with a fake smile plastered on my face

I swear I've been here before...
living the same year on repeat

This can't be it
there has to be more to this boring game

“Money can't buy life”
realisation burns like a slap in the face

I'm smarter than this
I won't get caught in this web of numbness
that comes from only existing

Opening my eyes with a blade
it hurts... the truth always does
Opening my eyes to life
...that feels good though

Business men pick their noses in trains.
They think no one sees them but I haven't forgotten
the many hands that they shake.

Here it comes, again, the busy time for easy goers
Have to keep heads inside the books, and minds at rest
Rest is not an option, options are yet to be explored
Explore your mind, as you walk through the syllabus

Syllabus has sections A, B, C, D, and E
E for easy, go elsewhere
Else, difficult to get through
Through hard work comes knowledge, through the syllabus

Syllabus being covered , meanwhile, time flows like water
Is essential for slaking thirst
Thirst of knowledge, with search and judgement
Judging capabilities, as I walk through the syllabus


|AB|

“Business as usual” prophesied
by sombre faces with panic stricken eyes

Whispers of crooked plans
cultivated behind closed doors

Loyalty called upon from the poor few
that know the muffled truths
while honey coated promises blinds the rest

The innocent to be sacrificed
to spare the tragedy from the rich

Who is safely nestled on their lifeboats
while watching the ship sink

i feel like a shredded jigsaw puzzle
the unsolvable rubik's cube
abstract art by the picasso of melancholy
who couldnt find a way out of his blue period
melted ice cream sundae and cherry
sitting forgotten rotting on hot summer concrete

the common man of the cubicle
would eat people like me for dinner
and he would enjoy it too with his
overly happy son and his
overly happy wife and his
overly happy purebred golden trophy dog
i sit at the middle of the table
the eye of attention and
stuffed by an apple to keep me shut and
they stare at me ready to tear me apart and
for dressing tonight they will eat my tears

cover me in blankets and lay me down in bed
i will slip away for the night and
in the morning hopefully
i will be a step closer to completed

Without asking for more than the simple sweet simplicities,
I am bounded by the same laws and rules for life.
No use in explaining the values of eccentricities,
We are all tools for the media, for what they strive.
A product of the temptation for power over others, we will stay
The same forever, entrapped in ice with our sisters and brothers,
The silly dreams we have, our pursuits. A tiny bit of concern to the
Rich-who live to find the right eye liner, lip gloss-or the best set of
Nine Irons for golfing or business suits. Some day they will
Get what they deserve, some day...some day.
*But too bad for me, some day came a little too late...