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Brumous Oct 2021
Please, tell me...
Tell me if you love me,
I still don't know what you think of me
My heart serenades for your love endlessly,
I won't bat an eye if all went down tragically

With my life of screaming melancholy,
tell me that you loved me.
I based it on a book, that I'm currently reading.
Romance but with full-blown angst, my type of books.

-Br.
Warten,
in einem fremden Raum.
Ungewohnte Gerรคusche.
Unangenehme Gerรผche.
Die Anwesenheit einer Fremden im Bett nebenan,
auch wartend,
auch nicht schlafen kรถnnend.
Wie kalter Honig zieht sich die Zeit.
Der Wunsch nach dem Ende der Nacht
begegnet der Angst vor dem Morgengrauen.
Alles strรคubt sich.
Die Augen brennen vor Mรผdigkeit.
Die Matratze zwingt den Muskeln ihre Hรคrte auf.
Was alles sein wird oder sein kรถnnte am morgigen Tag,
taucht auf und ab,
wie ein Ball wogend auf dem Meer.
Der Versuch, alles auszublenden;
die fremde Umgebung,
die fremden Gerรคusche,
die fremden Gerรผche,
die Fremde.
Abtauchen in eine andere Welt;
in meine Welt,
meine Gedanken,
mein Denken.
Mรผdigkeit รผbermannt mich.
Schlaf beendet das
Warten.
unnamed Jul 2021
Everyone always expects a butterfly,
When they find that fearless cocoon;
Hanging over certain death,
And inviting a birth from a new womb.
They expect a sunrise to arise,
To dry out their wings and take flight.
Glittering generalities caught in icarus's wings.
People expect the best from your worst,
And you'll expect that that's best.
Yet this expectation leaves us cursed.
Like the monarchs, who dance under the sun;
When moths are birthed, they dance under a dead one.

I reject the notion of expected beauty,
I reject this reality that-
I need to dance in the sun,
Shine bright beneath the trees,
And fly high to melt my wings,
I despise this idea
Because like the moths,
I will dance among the stars
Between the moons of Jupiter,
And sing with selene in the night.

I will burst from my cocoon
Not in your beauty,
But in mine
Hello everyone, I'm still alive after a tad bit of inactivity, went to Colorado for awhile for camp counseling teaching medicine for BSA.
Going to Florida to sail around the Keyes for a week in two days, we'll see how that works....

(Hmmmm specialize in internal medicine, maybe???? Nahhhhh neurology is too cool not to go into...)
Ashtereth Jul 2021
I'm bound by thin shackles, thick ones too,
My mind is held hostage and how I try to escape,
My body may move, yet the Chains of History keep me bottled, I can't forget the ghosts of my past; the traps I so blindly walked into,
How they love to linger,
As a painful reminder of my regrets and remorse,
They speak to me, like every rose to its thorn,
They bind tighter,
I smile.
For with them,
I am Complete.
Zelda Jul 2021
All we were
was the end of a moment
All we were
was spilled wine on the carpet
All we were
was lingering, fading, words never spoken
We should've been the start of time
But all we are is...
mari Jul 2021
would you be surprised to know i still dream
of *** treasure troves and storms at sea?
when it's black out and the earth is humid,
waves rush in and strike me down like cupid.
i remember jupiter and selling stars on the boulevard.
whoever you are; my lover, my ****,
call me your good girl and kiss my tears away.

pegasus dancin' as savages ravage my rose garden
and tell me i got everything i wanted.
raspberries litter the ground of my home;
asphyxiating on the smog of a roach.
tell me you love me 'fore my heart can roam;
tail-lights like rubies dash past my eyes.
the sun dies in neon, but what about me?

so bathe me in red, white, and blue.
why can't i forget to dream of you?
killing me softly with your bare hands;
never felt as loved by any other man.
you're so much larger than life,
murderous rage disguised as love while i smiled wide.
i laugh while i cry so i don't feel so low,
but tiger stripe bruises will never fade.

well, everyone loved me until i went rogue.
now they're spray-painting outside my home.
blood drips down slow, molasses and sweet;
the village i roamed now cowers under my feet.
please, mr. rager, won't you spin me a story;
tell me again about your days of glory.
sing me something pretty as i drink 'til i ache.
drunk again for the third day in a row
ebh Jun 2021
oh my darling angel you are the reason iโ€™m still a person with skin
you are the reason i wake up in the morning and smile sometimes
with teeth sometimes without but smile nonetheless//you are the reason i eat
with such gusto because i know you would laugh at the way i wolf down pasta//you are
the reason for the hole in my chest in your absence i collapse like a dying star//you are the reason
iโ€™m trying so hard to be better and//you are the reason i called my therapistโ€™s office and said hi
yes could i please have a listening ear//you are the reason all my cuticles are picked ragged like
so many spiky sea animals warning you not to touch//you are the reason for my writing
the note you left me to write calling me โ€œstinkyโ€ still sits on my shelf untouched//you are the reason iโ€™m
insecure about my taste in alcohol//you are the reason iโ€™m not insecure about my laugh anymore//you are the reason that my hair is soft and//you are the reason
iโ€™m shaving my legs again//you are the reason i care about *** at all and//you are the reason it
scares me so ******* much
you are the reason for much of my life as it stands now proud and tall and shaking
like a fawn still wet from her motherโ€™s womb
i kinda like how this turned out, it needs a lot of work but honestly i'm just gonna post drafts on here and see how it goes
gray Jun 2021
There are eight hundred different ways to describe
the way that I feel when I look into your eyes:
is it anger? Regret? Sadness? Fear?
Did you know I haven't forgotten you all of these years?

Yes, you did hurt me and for that, I cried for
almost three months you can't be surprised-
because what you took from me? Something so pure,
and turned me into something else, that wasn't there before.

It's been a while-; I'm glad of that.
I see you've changed and I'm proud of that.
I hope your new girl won't get hurt like me-
please don't leave her in tears and ruined sexually.
it's been a couple years, and I've never fully talked about the ****** assault I faced with my ex boyfriend when I was 15. But I feel like this is one of the best ways I can put it: I don't know how I feel when I see him, and I don't know how to feel about his friends. But I do hope "I" is okay- don't you dare hurt her.
Viktoriia Jun 2021
heaven is a lonely place to die
even if it's called a paradise.
there must be a reason why
the ticket comes
with a warning in small font.
don't forget to say goodbye,
there will be no coming back
from this joyride.
take a step towards your dream.
is it just as sweet as you thought?
was it really worth your life?
i hope so.
heaven is a lonely place to die
even if it's called a paradise.
now that you're already here,
welcome home.
You said that I held my fate in my hands.
That everything happens for a reason.
Well I want you to know that this is what I'm choosing.
Because of you the world only looks worthy of destruction.

And I am going to burn this world down with me.
I choose to die the villain.
No ******* out there can tell me that there is still hope for me.
This is what I chose.

And I plan not to die a hero, no.
I'm going out with revenge served cold.
With drying blood on my hands.
Fallen from heaven, I hit the ground conscience first.

So if fate is really predestined then congratulations.
I am who I am now.

You can't save me.

This was always meant to be from the first moment I graced this world with my unstained eyes.

I welcome you to watch this Godforsaken Earth burn with me and you in it.

Be my guest, let's watch the world end.

-Kore
my L'MANBURG PHIL-
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