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  Feb 1 Eliana Horning
nini
i have nothing to write



except for everything
the crackly sound of his voice through my overheating phone is immensely comforting after a week of eye bags and fake extroversion

eating with him on the phone makes my sour strawberries so much sweeter and the pineapple less biting

i love yous traded between bites of subpar greasy pizza and above average vegetable soup

even 313 miles away his voice still wraps around me like a well-loved blanket

keeping me warm and comforted and safe

and sitting alone in a dining hall with dozens of people surrounding me i feel comforted knowing

that he was sitting alone in his room with the tv blasting the smash tourneys he loves so much

and yeah, maybe i talk about him too much

and yeah

maybe he’s all i really write about

but when you find something that makes you feel like you caught a rainbow in your hands

it’s a little difficult to not shout it from your 9th floor dorm room at 10pm on a friday
:)
it’s… okay

sitting there with seven people who know me best surrounding me

eating cucumbers with salt and strawberry cheesecake ice cream

little bursts of laughter ringing out at updates at our lives

impromptu staring contests breaking out with one of the strangest and funniest men i’ve ever known

“how’s the fam”s and “i missed you guys”s cropping up every once in a while

it’s more than okay

it’s another home

i’ve always thought that home was supposed to be just one place, one location or person in which your soul blossoms like sunflowers in the summertime. i don’t think that now. your home can be with your cat with the upside down heart on his face, and with your mom whose hands smell like cool lotion and kindness, and your dad who sings paul mccartney too loud, and with your brothers who share tiktoks with you and laugh at your terrible jokes. your home can be with your friend with purple dyed hair, or your friend with red dyed hair, or your friend with the mustache, or your other friend with the mustache, or your roommate who gives too much, or your friend who wears big jewelery, or your friend with the round glasses and big smile. your home can be with your curly-haired soulmate hundreds of miles away. your home can be with a girl you met online who you overshare with every day. your home is expansive and all-encompassing and everything that makes you feel safe and warm and fuzzy and all the cheesy stupid things rom-coms are supposed to make you feel but not in a romantic way just in a

comfortable way

home is comfort

home is safety

home is home
experimenting with form and prose poetry!

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