Do you ever feel so trapped in a world that you so desperately try to escape from?
Do you ever feel like no matter what you do, the outcome will always turn out bad?
Do you ever feel the words that come out of others mouths will always be negative?
Do you ever feel that you will never be able to live your own life because people are too busy controlling your every move and action?
Every thing I do is me trying to do what I want to do, yet doing what I want to do is the devils works, me being rebellious, me being inconsiderate, me being irresponsible, me not thinking.
At time I start to think about the words people say, I let it get to me, I sit and ponder on it, until I think about it, then I realize that this is my life, my story, and if I continue to sit here and let people tell me how to live my life and what paths to take, I will get no where I will always think what if and live in a bowl of regret soup.
I try to live a life with a shield over my body and heart, I don't try to show people the real me afraid of being hurt, yet I don't want to live in a mask because I don't show people who I really am.
Any ounce of presenting my true colors to the world is fail in the moral conduct of the world, if you show people who you really are, they will never accept you.
As time has grown and my thoughts have changed I have seen that when you show people who you really are and can be, that right there is everything, people love you SOOO much more when you just be yourself and aren't afraid to just show the true, magnificent, and benevolent colors that hide within you when you don't show who you can really be.
It's crazy how the people you used to trust the most with everything playing so well to be the enemy in disguise, now it's like whatever you say, may and will be used against you.

When he finally asks what’s wrong, tell him that he’s really just too good for you and you're afraid that one day he’ll wake up and realize that he could sleep with so many better women.
When he leaves the apartment and gets in the back of a taxi cab at two in the morning, don't follow him.
Maybe even though you saw him with another woman, laughing and joking in a smoky bar with their heads held close together, you still think you have a shot with him.
You don’t.

Dress yourself up if for no other reason than making yourself feel good. Put on your tightest, tiniest little black dress and some high heels and have a dance party in your own room with the stereo blasting.
Throw away his photos. Delete his texts, crumple up his notes and slot them into the paper shredder like old credit cards.
Thinking about him is dangerous; do not lie in bed in a quivering heap for days at a time. Do not mope or hit the snooze button simply so you can drift off to sleep and dream about him.
Jump in the shower and wash him out of your hair. Scrub your skin raw until you cannot smell him anymore. Wash your sheets. As you take them out of the dryer, practice saying your first and last name with adding his on.

Wreck your journal. This is the required “fresh start” your best friend told you about on New Years. She is tough and practical. Consider being more like her. Decide against it because having an affair with your husbands best friend is not practical.
Let your thoughts flow into questions that you pose to the world. Tell yourself that this is not an unfortunate habit.
Remind yourself that today in the modern world, if you’re single, that doesn't mean you’re missing “your other half.”  There isn't someone else out there running around with two arms and two legs and one head who used to be attached to one side of your body and will eventually find you again, on the street or in a deli or even at an indie rock concert in the back row; there’s just you. An imperfectly perfect human being who likes coffee or maybe hates it and has said awful, regrettable things to somebody else and is still trying to figure out how this whole life thing works.

When you are on the couch of your living room, do not reach out to squeeze the faces in the smoke you blow; do not think of his face. Reach out and draw the lines in your mothers face. She would have wanted you to.

Girl
/gərl/
-a female child.*

Girl
means i am not allowed to have an opinion unless i am labled as a feminist.

Girl
means i am not allowed to run as fast as boys.

Girl
means that i can't become president.

Girl
means that i am not as strong as the other boys.

Girl
means that i will never be as sucessful as most men.

Girl
means that i have to wear dresses and bows.

Girl
means that i have to be a stay at home mom when i'm older.

Girl
means that i have to cook and clean daily.

Girl
means-

That maybe i don't have to listen to society,

maybe i can face reality and prove everyone wrong

And after that i'll teach everyone how to play mahjong, kidding.

but really, i hope this doesn't sound silly

but i feel that i can be more than just a house mom,

maybe i can make bombs
instead -

or i can work hard and go to college, and become sucessful just like other men

i will not let my heart be trapped in a den

because of what society says about my gender

i don't want to stay home, and make things with a blender

I want to be free, and become a love-ly graphic designer


or maybe i'll have a finer

job one day.

but believe me when i say, i will not let my gender define who i am and what i will become.

*Girl
\gərl/
-A strong and lovely human being, who will not listen to society; but instead prove to everybody the amazing person she can be.

GIRL