There is no more happiness
No more emotions
You attacked my joy
Now it is just the end

Key after key I would play
Attempting to find the perfect sound
But now those keys have been silenced
And soon you'll be through the ground

No words can be said
Only tears that now fall in its place
Rhythm is no more,
Rhythm is now quiet

She was so young
And I took care of her with pride
Now she is dead
And now I...

Seven years I waited
Only to lose her in seven seconds
I tried to play her one last time
But she couldn't even cry

Her faint beautiful voice fights to escape
But she has been imprisoned within her own case
I'm sorry brother,
But you must pay!

I swear I haven't gone insane <br>
But it seems insanity is what the world is accustomed to <br>
Allowing hell to roam freely through our streets <br>
Flooding homes with nothing but darkness and despair <br>
Killing off the innocent <br>
While allowing the wicked reign over all with an iron fist <br>
It all happens so often <br>
It is as if this was how life was meant to be <br>
Plunged into chaos <br>
As it paints mother nature red to resemble that of a black...beauty...rose <br>
<br>
Rewriting a story that always ends the same <br>
A story of no mercy <br>
Not even to the children who now lie lifeless in their own beds <br>
As a mother holds their severed heads close to her ***** <br>
Hoping they'd hear the sound of her heart beating and rise from their own ashes  <br>
But even she knows it is too late for their poor innocent souls <br>
Causing her to cry blood tears as red as a black...beauty...rose

You're always running away
Running never looking the other way
But what are you running from
Are you really that afraid of the pain that you try your best to disappear from society
As if society is the source of your true sorrow
As if the pain is not an inner sensation that erupts in your heart
Where are you going to go anyways
Aren't you tired of always running away
Don't you want to run towards something for a change
Have something other than yourself to love and cherish
I can see that look in your eyes
That look of emptiness and dispair
"Stop hurting yourself",they yell
Just stop and turn around
There is nothing chasing you away but you're still afraid
What are you afraid of, yourself?
You use to be stronger than this
Always running towards danger to protect those you loved
Now you're just a shell of your former self
SNAP OUT OF IT ALREADY!
Stop running
It's going to be okay

Pow Pow thud
I was only Seven years old when it happened
Life hadn't even begun before it was taken from me
My best friend walked in with a loaded gun
Didn't tell anyone he had it
Didn't even show any signs before he snapped
He just smiled and laughed like any other day
Then it happened
At first it was quiet
But that didn't last for very long
There was a loud bang followed by a bright light
Next thing I know I was floating away looking at my own body
Drowning in my own blood
Wasn't moving, breathing, heart wasn't pounding
I was dead before I had the chance to live
As a kid I always said I never wanted to grow up
But now,
I'd **** just to experience it for a day

If I may have your attention please
Allow me to say just one little thing
And that is tragedy
Tra...ge...dy

If you do not agree that life is a delicate thing
This poem is not meant for thee
Well never mind this poem is meant for you to see
Because this poem is meant for everybody

So without further delay
Allow me to begin with what I have to say
But you cannot say you have not been warned
Because this poem will make become torn

Look around and what do you see
Life...Life is such a beautiful thing
Would you not agree
But life is being stolen from right beneath our very feet

A new threat has emerged from the deepest depths of the darkest abyss
One that has surpassed all violence before our very eyes
It is heartless attacking both our elders and our youth
Proclaiming no one is safe from it's voracious bite  

So one by one they fall
Both our future and our past
Causing one to think will we survive
Because as of now drugs smile as the world trembles beneath its feet

I wrote this poem for her,
But she'll never know cause I let her go
Now I feel kind of slow
Because now I realized I loved her so
I asked the stars for advice
But they just never glow
The moon disappeared amd just wouldn't show
The rivers no longer flow
The birds sing no more
I wrote this poem for her
But of course she'll never know

His name was unknown
A historical artifact lost throughout time
His face was a mystery
For it was an encrypted file locked behind a titanium mask
His voice...if he had one
It was silenced cricket,
Whose purpose in life just seemed to be no more

This is the story of a teen, who became known as silver

Legends have spoke of untold tales that prove he wasn't always like this
That he was once a very passionate and outgoing being
That he believed the world wasn't just a waiting room  for the afterlife
That the afterlife even existed to begin with
These tales told stories of him not crying tears of blood
In fact before no one knew what a tear looked like coming from his eyes
Now they can't remember a time he actually smiled

One tale blamed his sudden transformation on the death of his grandpa
Apparently he loved this man with all his heart
Grandpa was the only man who acted as a father figure to silver
When grandpa killed himself almost seven years ago
It was then silver began to crumble
He became weak, scared, terrified of what might happen next
After a while the silver everyone knew vanished from the naked eye

Another tale told of an event that occurred prior to his grandpa's death
An event that actually occurred throughout a single week
In this week silver was now homeless, his mother was jobless, and soon the car just gave in as well
Though then he did not cry,there was a certain look in his eyes that spoke depression
As if life to him was now pointless with him believing he was undeserving of this misery
Life and death were now the same to him
They both meant death and he was walking the path

There was one other tale that was said to be a major contributor to silver's pain
This is one being coming from within his own vessel
It was said that because silver was such a caring person he viewed the world's problems and became depressed because he couldn't do anything about them
It was said that it was just too much for him to handle
So he would secretly cut himself attempting to find a solution
Even after committing this taboo an answer never showed its rundown beaten face
So silver made a solution and that was to become emotionless

There are many other untold tales that lurnk in the shadows
Many in which will remain there for all eternity
But maybe if they all found the light the old silver
His name...
His face
His voice...
Maybe just maybe they would return

For sixteen years I wondered what it was like to have a father
For sixteen years I would stare at the stars wondering if one was even assigned me
For sixteen years I walked through the park only to see children laugh and play with their parents
For sixteen years...
I felt alone and confused
As I attempted to understand what it meant to be a man
I had no one to to call father and no one to look up to
While it seemed the rest of the world had everything I ever asked for
I would end up asking myself why did my father abandoned me
Why was he so enraged by my very existence he never showed his face to me
Why didn't he love me
Why...
I remember the day he walked through the front door
Full of so much joy I was, but angry
I took a quick glance at him wondering where had he been all this time
Why now did he decide to show himself
But still a part of me did not care
All that matter to me is that finally did
My head filled itself with so many questions of what it meant to be a man
But I was too afraid to ask them
Now I look back and think how naive I was
I was blinded from the truth by pure excitement
I mean I finally wasn't alone
But now I'm just angry by him existing
All he does is lie, cheat, and steal
Silly me for thinking he could save me
Now I just want him gone and for things to go back to the way they use to be
The way it was for sixteen years
Sixteen years of hell for me
But I still smiled because I had a mother who loved me
For sixteen years I lived without him and now...
Well now I can live without him for all eternity

I was born in the age of the struggle
Trying to become something in a world my kind was not accepted
Constantly dodging bullets that the white man seemed to have an infinite amount of
As the corrupt turned a blind eye unofficially proclaiming my kind irrelevant
All because my skin is not as white as the North Pole
All because before I was born I was labeled incompetent
Unable to do anything other than picking cotton in the blazing heat
Destined to be the white man's little *****
Being blamed for everything even though we can't do anything
Taken from my home against my will
Thinking about the tears my little girl now sheds as she was bend over on all fours
I was born in the age of the struggle
But my struggle is one that never went down in history
All because I am nothing more than a wild beast
Even though I had life that was stolen from me

Smile.
A smile is not the cure to pain
It is not the gateway to happiness
It is simple a mask to compress the pulsating sorrow that shows all over your broken soul
A smile is nothing more than another ****** expression saved in your memory banks
It has no real meaning
At the same time it represents something that is so much more
It represents a passion that is often wrongfully ignored
It represents resolution within your own being
Hope that illuminates from your very skin
But a smile itself represents absolutely nothing
When someone tells you to smile they are not saying it will solve all of your problems
They're saying it'll maybe help you answer your unanswered questions
That it will maybe help bring peace to your off balanced mind
That it will maybe lead you to a reason to actually feel joy
Help you break through the invisible gate,
Instead of looking like a **** poor pitiful soul who lost everything
That is the definition of a smile
The word ****** expression that lost it's meaning
So do the world a favor and just smile

I can't feel my face anymore
It's as if my whole world has gone numb
My wings have been snapped clean off
Now I'm living off the scraps like some type of wild animal
I can't breathe...
Feels like I'm being suffocated by the seven seas
But in actuality it's just the pain getting the best of me
As I crawl attempting to reach sanctuary
But everytime it seems like I'm getting closer to the light
I can feel the darkness creeping up my spine and yanking me back into the heart of the night
It then caress me like a momma to her new born baby
Whispering in my ears there is no escaping
I'm stranded here
And there is no one coming to rescue me
I mean why would they...
I'm in this mess because of those dimwits
Always kicking me and punching me
Making me feel like I'm nothing more then an old piece of chewed up gum stuck to the bottom of your shoes
Can't blame them though,
Because that's what I am
A nuisance, an inconvenience to society
So instead of fighting it let me embrace it
Now I'm dead trapped in a unmarked wooden box

Smiling...

I'm only human
But I feel like the world expects me to be a God
Refusing to accept me because I'm not like them
A puppet with strings sticking out of his broken limbs
A pretender hiding his face behind the white mask of solitude
Walking the same beated path the rest of you slaves do
I'm sorry world but I rather not be a slave to society
Because I'm own being who travels the road less taken
A being who paves his own destiny with every step he takes
Because I'm the master of my fate and the captain of my soul
And I refuse to be a piece of lettuce in another's salad bowl
So instead selling myself out like a ****** on the side of the road
I'll be a king who sits on his own throne

And with this I decree ******* to be a national holiday
As I give my heart away saying **** what they say
Because on this day love is in the air
But lucky me I am still single as you can clearly tell
But the question is how if there are so many fish in the sea
All swimming right past me ignoring me
Even if silly me attempt to talk to thee
They all just give me the fin and jumps on another D
As he looks back just smiles at me
So here's me wave bye to mr. Luck
Knowing **** well he just wants to **** the sea
Sending them back to me crying
Just to burry their gem like eyes into everything but where I want them to be
Well **** life I scream to the court inside of me
Because I just got sentenced to you thought you were getting lucky
As I get hit with you're such a great guy
Oh my, ***** you lie
Because if I was a great guy why every time I try to talk to you, you say goodbye
I smell *******
But of course you don't think I smell it on thee
But hey this is my life
May I have some more ******* in wine
Because it looks like I'm calling it a night

All this time I have been hating myself for falling in love with you
Letting my guard down now my heart never wants to be away from you
I don't even know what it is that keeps driving my back to you
I would say it's your charms, beauty, but that's honesty not the truth
Now every girl I see my mind automatically compares her to you
But no one ever exceeds you and that's the honest truth
I know I sound insane but my mind just won't understand
My heart is confused convinced that it'll come back to you
Not getting through its thick skull  that I lost you
So now I'm lonely soul walking a dreaded path
Not knowing why I was destined to face such wrath

I was just a little black boy born in a raw town
Nothing else but me and my saw now
I could never say that papa was ever around
But I could say that momma never made a sound
She never cried never whined never did any of that crap
She just smiled and waved  as life hit us hard
But I never understood how the pain in her heart
She would never let it show like it wasn't there from the start
But we all knew the truth
Momma was breaking down
She cried silently thinking we wouldn't notice her burning red eyes
As she slowly died on the inside  
Still tryna stay strong for her four little children
But the truth was momma was gone
Died on the inside long ago
Unable to feel the pain that haunted her soul
Sorry momma we wasn't that strong
Should've helped her more
Now you're gone
Six feet underground
Sorry momma may you rest in peace

I don't know why I bother anymore
The damage has been done already and it cannot be reversed
Yet I feel like I still can do something to fix this
As if this still existed
It was so long ago when we met
Everyone just seemed to hate you and I found it to be funny
I found it something I could relate to
The only difference was you didn't care
No, you actually seemed to laugh at it
Which intrigued me even more
Now we are fighting as if we're enemies in world war III
Guns pointed at each other head and knives at the throats
Wishing the other would just die
But funny thing is I don't want that anymore
I actually wish to be your friends
Not an enemy like everyone else
I know strange when I kinda initiated this war
Well not kinda I did start this war
I should of just backed down that day
Really didn't mean to hurt you
For that I am sorry
I'm sorry
Wish I could take back that day
I just wish we could be friends again

What determines a man's strength
Is it his mental or physical endurance
Maybe it's the size of his muscle that counts
Or maybe it's all about the size of his little man down below
Is it determined by how fast he can run
How brave he fights
Determined by how quick he reacts to a particular situation
The real question is how do you judge a man
Is not every man different
So by logic must you know what real man looks like
But every being has their own taste
Their own opinion about what a real man is
So how do judge something that everyone views differently
The answer is you don't
Every man is equally as strong
It just depends on who he has by his side
Which is why I'm glad I have you
One who I cherish so
Who I so desperately strive to protect
Who gives me purpose in life
Who gives me the strength to continue forward
Instead of being paralysed unable to take another step
This is why I love you
You gave strength that I could not have imagine to obtain on my own
So I hope that you see that what I feel is true
That all I really want is to be with you

Remember
You must remember
Remember who you are
Why you came to this place

Remember
Why can't you remember
You're worthless
A disgrace to humanity

No,That's not true
It can't be true
You have accomplished so much
Gained so much on your own

Stop lying to yourself
What have you really gained
you're still alone in a hell like world
Burning your soul over an open fire

Why...
Why do you torture yourself
Feeding yourself this false hope
Just give in already

No one cares about you
You're nothing
If you were to disappear no would notice
GIVE IN ALREADY,leave your soul

My soul...
I can't leave something that has already gone
But even it wasn't I would never give in to you
Never will I give up as if my life means nothing

You have no soul
WHAT CAN YOU POSSIBLY LOSE
Come with me my child
It will be alright

*To be continued

I wish I never started
Started to believe that there was hope for me in this world
That I could be somebody instead of nobody like my predecessors told me
I wish I never started

I wish I never started
Started to fall victim to my teenage mentalities
Falling in love with a girl thinking I had a chance with thee
I wish I never started

You see,
I have been walking this shadowed path trying to get from point A to Point B
Banging my head against this solid brick wall
Just to watch the blood trickle down **** stained body
Crying in secret because I'm starting to realize that I am nothing more than fool for life's entertainment
As I slowly sink to the bottom of the dark matter sea
Looking at my reflecting as it shakes its head at me

I wish never started
Started this whole mission to escape the pain that haunted me
Believing that there really was a way to escape the endless abyss
I wish I never started

I wish I never started
Started to believe that the sorrows couldn't catch me if I ran fast enough
But now I'm just tired and too drained to look back up
I wish I never started

Just make it quick
I'm starting to get sick of this contradicting mindset
One side telling me that I am something
As the other just laughs and smile letting life do the talking
Popping popcorn over the fiery pitts of hell waiting to roast me
As it determines what seasoning will go best with thee
I'm tired can't you see
But life still pokes me with its pitchfork trying to force me to just give up

I wish I never started
Started to wish that I should start something new
Become something greater than the you in the mirror
I just wish I never started

But hey I'm glad I started
It was fun while it lasted
So I guess what I should be saying is
I'm wish I started sooner

To my friend lexi,

I spent so much time on these first few words
Looking foolish at my screen pondering in my own thoughts
Just wondering if I wrote this would it find its way to you
And if somehow it did, what would it do

From a distance I watched you smile
Listened to your laugh
Only to become paralyzed by the sight of your pretty brown eyes
Which caused me to become stomped

So nervous that my words become garbled
As I attempt to analyze this apocryphal event
Cause there is no way any of this could be real
Not in a million years, not including me!

But indeed it all authentic
All of this is real
You are not a figment of my imagination
No,You stand before me mocking me

If I were brave enough I would of held your hand
Squeezing it tight as I told my untold tale
About how you make me feel when talking to you
How I can't ever really frown while in your presence

But I have never been strong enough
So I just sit there smiling and laughing with you
Wishing these moments never have to end
That you and I would remain friends forever more

It is those moments I adore
There isn't a day that goes by I don't think of you
The sweet majestic tone in your voice
That amazing smile upon your beautiful face

It all just leaves me speechless in a way
There are never really any words to say
But it's never just us waving as the clouds glide away
No,it is always us wishing each other to stay

So Lexi my dear friend
Listen carefully to what I have to say
Don't go away
And promise I will do the same

I wish my life was fairytales and rainbows
I wish everything would fall in place like it was meant to
I wish I had the strength to never let her go
To hold her tight in my arms as if we melted into one

But that's just not the way my life goes

No, my life is difficult
Nothing ever goes the way it was meant to
There are no rainbows or tooth fairies in my reality
My dreams are that of war and casualties

I wish I lived in a different world
I wish I could make everyone proud of me
I wish I could walk with pride in my chest
Never letting the worse get a hold of me

But that's just not the way my life goes

In actuality I am weak
On the floor searching for the scrapes of dignity
My chest is flat because all pride has deserted me
The worse is always getting a hold of me

I wish I was strong you see
Flying high in the clouds above me
But like I stated before
That's just not the way my life goes

When I was a kid...I was innocent
Believing everything was just perfect,
Or if it wasn't perfect, it would work out when the time called for it
However, when I grew up that innocent mind died
Shot at point blank range right in the eye
Causing me realize that society was ****** up  from the inside
Crying tears that was made up of this substance that leaked from other bloodlines
Now I sit here wondering how did I miss this as a child
Was I that naive that I believed everything was made up of sunshine and rainbows
Completely ignoring all these ugly *** fuckboys and ***** hoes
Now I'm just soaked in my own rage and regret
Failing to determine if I'm just getting angrier or if society is getting stupider
So I just scream at the top of my lungs screams
Falling through the ground still pondering as to what happened here
No seriously, someone please tell me what happened here

I have been marooned in this ****** up place for 13 years
Ever since I was 5 when I first tried to survive
But only ended up dying in the firey pitts of hell
Got shot twice in the chest and once in the head
As I drowned in a pool of my conscious blood
I can feel the walls coming down upon me
The ground collapsing beneath me
So I scream at the top of my lungs for help
But no one ever comes or they do but just stare
As I cried blood tears from my jet black eyes
Why won't you help me
You see me struggling to gasp for air but you just stare
For what...sigh
My life is ****** up but I don't want to die
Though to the world I already have,in my mind I am still alive
Can't you see that I am trying to smile
Trying to not cry anymore
I just really want to survive this cold war
Please allow me to experience no more

Tag you're it
Life was so much easier when we were kids
None of that real **** ******* existed in our world
Our biggest concern was oh, he stole my snack
Ha,how I long for those days to be once again
Now I often stare at stars wondering will I ever discover peace
Wondering if I will ever regain the spirit I had as a kid  
The days when I all wanted to do was go outside and enjoy life
Because now I just want to go outside and burn it to the ground
There is so much suffering in the world it makes you wonder how it still goes around
How these poor soul manage to get up even though they have been pounded down
I would say it's determination but clearly determination is telling them to kiss its ***
So what the **** is this **** we call our lives
Are we really living it to the fullest or are we living a bunch of lies
Life clearly wants us to burn to pay for our crimes against ourselves
Ourselves...
We claim to ourselves that we are heading towards a brighter future
But the only future I see...
Well let's just say there is no future
Which only makes me long for the life I had as a kid even more than I did before

If you are one who hates to shed tears...


This is not a poem for your eyes to read

This is not a poem of happiness
This is not a poem of hope
This is not a poem of light

This is a poem of shattered dreams
This is a poem of broken hearts
This is a poem of pure sadness

Please support the following

There once was a boy whose name shall not be said
This boy had dreams and the motives to complete them
He was foolish enough to believe he could do anything

One day this boy came home to a tree
He starred at this tree with great interest
Wondering how in the world this tree fell on his house

Little did this boy know that tree was only the beginning
He slowly walked towards the tree and realized that was his home
So he walked to his neighbors house failing to take his eyes off the tragedy

The little boy knocked on the door with a smile on his face and said
"Can I use your phone to call my mom, there's a tree on my house"
Then he laughed as if this situation was humorous to him

When he finally got to the phone he was fascinated by it's old school design
Slowly he dialed his mom's number only to learn some heartbreaking news

His momma died moments earlier from a stray bullet
The boy dropped the phone and slowly began to back away
His eyes were widened in disbelief

The boy was so broken he could not cry
He walked away after that and disappeared
That fateful day was the last time that little boy was seen

Some say he killed himself and his body lays dormant at the bottom of the sea
Others say he is still alive alone in the woods somewhere
The truth is...

Tyler burned himself alive causing the biggest forest fire in history
Tyler was only eight years old
Full of hope now spreaded all over the world as ashes

Rest is peace young Tyler

She will never know that I still love her so
That I would still give her the world if I could afford to do so
All she knows is that I became this ******* and told her to go
So she pushed me away shouting I hope you burn
Not realizing that my heart and soul were already engulfed in flames
As I secretly cried saying I hope you find mr.right
She doesn't know how I spent the rest of that night
That I watched her walk away until she was out of sight
Before collapsing to my knees and began to cry with all my might

You may find pondering in the rain,
Walking along the shores of the beach
Staring at where the skies and seas meet
As I cry wondering what can I possibly say
Never once in my life have I felt this pathetic
Tripping on thin air as my feet are suffocated by the muddy sand
I never thought i'd know the sweet sensation of freedom ever again
Then suddenly I felt your warmth thawing out my frozen heart
Your skin glowed radiating a beauty that can not be measured
Your teeth shined so bright they blinded the stars in midnight skies
Your eyes were like precious rare jewels that hypnotized any who came near
You made me wonder was I dead
I have been saved by an angel
And angel was you

Who am I to judge men with broken souls
To tell them that the dagger that currently pierces their heart hurts or not
What right do I have to tell them to get over it
As if I have felt the pain that courses through their veins
Over the generation humankind has been known to reject science they have yet to understand
And as a man I can vouch for that
We as men have been marked as emotionless beings
But can you really blame us for it
Growing up we were fed with the knowledge of our past lives
That we had to remain strong when times got tough
Simply because of the fact that we are men
When they cry our shoulders are the ones they lean upon
When they are scared we are the ones they look to for protection
And we can't let them down
What would we look like if we ran cowardly in the mist of the darkness
Seeing their faces slowly being drenched in tears as we turned the other way
So as men we reject the feeling of pain to be there for those who need our help
But because of this we cry silently into the air wishing we had the option to run
That we had the option to hide behind someone and feel safe
But that's not the case
We stand there starring danger in the eyes only thinking about those behind us
So when I see a man with a broken soul I can't blame him
Though I probably haven't felt his pain, I felt pain similar too it
For the dagger it leaves lodged into your chest
You tell us if it hurts or not

Why can't "1" be an alphabet
I mean it looks just like the letter "L"
And so does "I" but no one ever goes there
All "3" is a backwards "E"
"7" looks like "Z" missing it's tail
But "1" still can't be an alphabet
That's kinda messed up don't you think
Why can't the order be "A" "B" "C" "1" "D"
That sounds pretty catchy to me
It can be changed
And if you dare say it can't think about poor little pluto
All my life they were telling pluto was planet
Then one day out of the blue they want to say it's not
That pluto dwarf planet
What a downgrade
Bet pluto back there crying his small tears away
But still "1" can't be an alphabet
That's hysterical if you ask me
So let it be
let "1" come after "C"
And wave your hands if you with me

"yas *****," I would say
Only to be dismissed away
Looking him in the eyes wondering
How dare you frown upon me
As if I'm the beast unseen
You came to my home stripped me of my joy
***** and killed my family
Holding me captive as a prison of war
How dare you frown upon me
As if I'm the beast unseen
You forced my daughter to cry
As you hauled off her last bit of hope
At least I have some dignity
Though it seems my pride has been lost deep within green
Where the blue skies don't feel darker than coal
How dare you frown upon me
As if I'm the beast unseen

Hear me,
Hear me speak in my native tongue
This poetic justice
From the artist that never belong
From the... sad child who just smiled on the outside
But on the inside was dying from starvation
I'm hungry...
It feels like I haven't eaten anything for an eternity
When actuality the food has just been running right through me
It's sad that not even food see me
It just falls into barring wasteland deep within the blood sea  
Which are just my tears that never seem to stop falling from the... hell skies that absorb me
Free me...
Free me from the burning shackles that laugh at me
I feel as if I'm going crazy
The sun is cold to thee
I'm freezing
I can't breathe
The shadows are suffocating me
Draining me of my very life force
I'm crying...
In a dark corner...
Burning alive...
In the center of a world that doesn't want me

I swore I'd never let her go but I watched her walk away
Instead of chasing her I stood there with a frown upon my face
My head was full of shame and disgrace
The thought of failure,
Did I really make a mistake
My heart began to crumble as she got farther away
Move fool move why are you still standing in this place
I did not yet understand that it was already too late
For when I finally made it to her she already had a new mate

Let me be real
This poem is about nothing
It's not about me being madly in love with this girl
Not about the injustices in the world
It is just me writing the words that flow through my mind
The endless waterfall that never seems to cease
So if anyone wish to step up an continue the beat
Or just stroll  down the poetic river that seems to breathe
Please, do as you please and just speak
What comes next is up to thee

What's the point anymore!
What's the point of me telling my story when you you tell it for me
Making it seem like I'm just this bad guy

What's the point anymore!  
What's the point of me trying to make a good first impression when the whole words thinks they know me before I know they exist
When the truth is they only know the BS story you manage to tell them

What's the point anymore!
What's the point of me attempting to do anything when the whole world thinks I'm a *****
Then when I prove I can do something it only gets ten times worse

What's the point anymore!  
What's the point saying I care about something when you automatically think how you can use that against me
Hint that's where I don't care came from

Then you wonder why I decided to keep my mouth shut
Why I completely detached myself from the outside world
Just going M.I.A. both physically and mentally

You wonder why I don't tell you anything that goes on my life anymore
As you attempt to ask how was my day
Funny how life works out right

You wonder why I have a major problem with authority
Why I find it so difficult to trust anyone
Why I try so hard to disclaim you and my entire family

It just hurts

Bang bang
Little boy jimmy was only four years old
But at four years old he already knew what death taste like

May 16, 2012 at 11:59pm

He was found laying in his bed soaking in his own blood
It was a minute before his birthday, he was turning five on May 17, 2012
He was hit by stray bullet
Or that is what they say...

May 16, 11:56 pm

Three cops barged in Jimmy's house claiming they received a call of a disturbance
Jimmy's dad died the day after he was born and his mom was single
There was no one in the house but jimmy and his mom katrina
On the police report it read that when the cops arrived Jimmy was dead and his mom was found in the corner brutally beaten and *****
She had been shot twice in the chest and once in the head
She was permantly brain damaged and paralyzed from the waist down
Everyday she cried tears of blood and no one really knew why
But it is obviously what really happened that fateful day

May 18, 2013

Katrina was found hanging from her balcony
She committed suicide
Or was it ******
Bang bang
Thus end story of Jimmy and his family

For years I have had poetry misconstrued
Thinking about what it was technically
Instead of thinking about what it was actually
Because technically poetry is nothing more than words on a sheet of paper
It has just been arranged in a certain way to tell a story

I remember my first days of writing poetry
Personally I thought that it was gay
And because I knew how to write it so well I questioned my sexuality
It bothered me so much in fact, there came a time I attempted to hide the forbidden skill
Ha,that didn't last very long

My first poem dates back to the year 2006,when I was in third grade.
It was ,"simply amazing", according to my teacher
I can recall because I ripped it up hoping to never see a poem again
I hated poetry with a passion due to the fact it coarsed through my veins
I didn't see another poem until the six grade

It was then I met this girl named Deja,a fanominal poet
She would always brag in our second period literature class how she was just the best
I slick had a crush on her but I'd never tell her that
She claimed I was nothing compared to her
So I laughed and wrote the poem, "Different I May Be,"

Never once other then that moment did I get her to hush
She actually began to blush a little though we pretended that never happened
Her eyes were both just wow
They spoke fierce yet sweet
I really was falling deeply for her

That day I finally opened my eyes beginning to think that poetry really wasn't gay
That it was actually a beautiful thing
Though I didn't start actually writing poetry until the end of that year,
After I read the poem,I know why the caged bird sings",by Maya Angelou
I kind of owe this rediscovery of my lost talent to Deja,again I will never admit that to her

She made me realize what poetry was actually
That it is a collaboration of both heart and soul
Using words to express emotions that were seen as taboo at a time
So Deja if by some miraculous chance you see this
I would like to say thank you for opening my eyes to the world of poetry

So this is happening
This is really happening

We call them soldiers
Killing machine that fight for peace
As everything around them is blown to smithereens
They die for a good cause we like to say
Not truly acknowledging that sacrifice they just made
Their dead...
The blood that trickles down stream clearly indicates that
That's something we have become too acquainted with actually
Never truly had a problem with leaving our own behind
Even though in the beginning we preach just the opposite
****, we're sick
Infected with this disease to send one another out to die alone
As we watch them cry begging go home
But there is no home, not for us
If we don't win there will only be misery
Blood rivers that come together to form masses big enough to drown in
But it's the same story even if we do win
Nothing but death

**to be continued

We say we are different
But we only show how alike we truly are
It's as if all we are is a mirror image of the other
Both shouting that I am the original
That you are just a shadow
But let me ask you something
Have you ever truly asked who "you" are
Who "we" are
What is our true purpose upon this meat infested planet
Are we peace bringers
Or is that just a nicer way of saying destroyers
Often you would find me staring at the moon
Asking it for answers that eludes not only I
But the moon never responds
So I just end up laughing and getting lost in the skies
As a kid they told us that every star was a soul that was lost
That now instead of being with us physically they watch over us spiritually
Ha, maybe that is so
But like everything else...
Who truly knows

I can't help but to ask what war are we truly fighting
Is it against them...
Or is it against the image in the mirror
We claim that ever decision we make is for the greater good of the human race
But we blow their heads off and celebrate it as a victory
And that is what gets to me
How could we smile and laugh as if what we just did was okay
As if the life we just passed judgment upon meant nothing
What if he/she was a father or a mother
One who was just shooting back because their alternative was to bath in puddle of their own children's blood
Can't you see they are fighting the same battle as us
Because they are just like us
They are trying to earn the title is survivor just like us
They just want to go home to their families just like us
They just want to protect their loved ones just like us
But unlike us the majority of them don't make it back
Because unlike us they lay on the battlefield saying their final goodbyes from a far
No one ever thinks about the pain a suffering we bring in order to uphold peace
So allow me to end this with a question

Is it truly peace we seek, if the price we pay is another's life?

From nothing I became something
From something I became nothing
And from nothing I became a fraction of my former self
Struggling to walk, talk,eat,sleep
Struggling to understand where have I been, and where am I now,
As I attempt to locate my other half
Only to fail for so long
For three years in fact, I ran as fast as I could searching for the thing in something
Only to located more of nothing
Now this is my fourth year,
My senior year has finally come
And now more than ever I am determined to locate my missing thing

How did we end up in this place
Trying to survive a war that exist because of greed
Living a life that is consumed by hate
Attempting to find joy that has eluded us for centuries
How did we end up in this place

We were once simple folks
Once upon a time we saw the rainbows and the unicorns that skedaddled in the wind
Now all we see is the dull black and white world
As we chose to focus on the corruption, the deception, and the perfect complexion
Completely ignoring the beauties in life
Forcing you to ask how did we end up in this place

We were once from a world where the little children can go outside and play in peace
Didn't have to worry about them ducking and covering praying this bullets didn't have their names written all over it
Didn't have to worry about mysterious people trying to ****** them up and force them into the *** trade
Once again forcing you to ask how did we end up in this place

We were once a family
If not by blood by relations
Starvation wasn't a thing that existed in our communities
If food was something you could not afford your next door neighbor had your back 
Offering you a four course meal even putting close on your back
So tell me...if this is where we came from
How did we...end up in this place

Hey...you okay
You seem kinda messed up in the head
Also seem to be talking a lot of ****
Like I don't know if I should give you some toilet paper or breath mint
Yeaaaaaa, that was kinda lame
But anyways can I ask you something
like on the real note  every time I hear your voice this question just appears in my head
It literally pulls a great Houdini on my *** shouting abracadabra as is makes its grand entrance
Yes I got jokes but I don't use them often
Now listen closely I don't want you to miss anything
You listening?
Okay good

Do I give a ****
Do I look like I give a ****
No seriously do I look like a give a ****
Cause apparently I'm supposed to give these two major ***** about what you think about me
Then I'm supposed to give even more ***** about what you "THINK" I think about you
When the truth in the matter I don't give a **** about you
You expecting me to drop down to your level taking these cheap shots
"oh, I ****** your mom last night"
congratulations couldn't get any from your age so you went and found yourself a cougar
Bravo whoopdy-*******-do
Now let's get real, grow up
Are you really that pathetic that you attack someone who isn't even in this situation
Like **** man how low can you go
This **** ain't limbo ya know
Look at you taking cheap shot at me from a far
oooooo I'm so afraid
Anyways that's all I wanted to say
If you're a real man you'd say it to my face
And for future notice remember this
Roses are red
Violets are blue
Hop off my ****
Especially you

To my future love,

Here we are in this place once again
Me at your feet making a fool of myself
Have you ever thought that these coincidental meetings are actually our destiny
That we were actually meant to be
I see the way you smile at me when we come face to face
It's the same smile you make when you're in your man's arms
You seem so relaxed and calm
As if the world suddenly feels safe

Recently I don't know what has gotten into me
My dreams seem to be so vivid while reality seems so dull
I looked into the mirror only to see a man in a white mask
His tears seeped through the cracks as if he felt an emptiness inside his soul
He seemed incomplete
His eyes were as red as the fire that burn at hell's gate
It was scary but actually kind of sad
It was me behind the mask

Without you I am nothing but a gentle breeze
Floating wanderlessly through a black ocean
My heart seems to be anchored to your very being
Clinching tightly to something that clearly isn't there
Or is it...I can't help but to think that feel the same way about me
That your heart aches for mine
I just really believe that for some reason , but if not...
I need to learn how to let go.

This letter wasn't supposed to be this long,
But it seems I can't get you out my head
You lay under a giant maple tree in a open field reading a book
Suddenly you look up and smile, waving me over as the birds sing
I smiled back of course but I didn't come to you
Instead I just laid there in a bed of flowers
There scent reminded me of you, it was lovely
At that moment I realized all of this was a dream

Or was it...
I opened my eyes and there you were before me
Here we are in this place once again
Me at your feet making a fool of myself
Only this time it will not be the same
This time I will be your man
This time you will be in my arms walking away
Why you say...


Because I just love you that way

Black skies...
Blue moon...
Storm clouds destroying everything on the move
Bad dreams...nightmares
Then there is you
Your eyes are like precious jewels
Your smile so scary because it is so perfect
Leaving me to daydream thinking about you
Ignoring the the black skies that surround me
The thunderstorm that strike the ground before me
Out all things that live on this earth you're the only one that scares me
Because you're so beautiful
And I am me

I wonder...
Can you hear me
Can you really hear my whispers in heaven
Or is that just another lie they told me so I would stop crying
I miss you so much
Watching me or not, I just want you here
Just to see you one more time
Hug you until I die so I can stand by your side JUST ONE MORE TIME
Just one more time...
Is that too much to ask
You meant so much to me
In fact the world was so much clearer when you were still alive
Now it is just blur
A giant blob of pure nothing
And to stand at your grave isn't enough to clear my sight
My soul feels like it is burning to ashes as your body decomposes  
I'm so scared
Help me...
I need you
Please...wipe my tears away
Just one more time
Please

I would like to dedicate this poem to the poets who were killed in the war known as life.  You have not been forgotten and will be forever in our hearts.

It's not over
This hateful war is not over
So many have died trying to fight this pointless battle
Man, Woman, and child have vanished into thin air,
As if they never existed

We cry our hearts out
Mourning over the soul that now seize to exist
Our brothers and sisters laying dormant upon the now tainted grounds
Oh no, this war is not over
Not until their lost souls can rest in peace

Us poets have taken pounding after pounding
We have cried the crimson tears,
But we are still here
And we have to stand tall
If not for ourselves, for those we have lost it all

We are strong powerful individuals
Who have learned to speak our mind through our words
We have learned to express pain in ways unlike violence
But remained human in the process
If anything we are the strongest beings in the world

We are pure souls living in the shadows of the night
Fighting for what we believe as just and right
We are the unspoken warriors that live to no destination
The titans that hide in plain sight
We are poets and we won't go down without a fight

Though we are weak in numbers
Though we die everyday
We shall bounce back
Like a phoenix being reborn from its own ashes
We are  the few, the strong...

We are the poets

Bang Bang*
I walked in and fell to the ground
Didn't walk out with two to the chest and one to the head
Now I'm dead,
Stuck in limbo not knowing how I died
Wondering why me, why me
Last thing I remember is smiling with my girl in hand
Then suddenly seeing her hand covered in my blood
"It was an accident", they said
Shot me three times and it was an accident
This is bull I swear
Now I'm forced to watch her cry tears of blood every **** day
Thinking to herself why did it have to be this way
I swear this isn't fair
She doesn't deserve to live in such despair
They say that with time even the pain of death goes away
But I swear the pain for her only got worse
So bad that it started to drive her insane
Then one day she finally had enough and extinguished her own life
And while she moved on hoping to see me again
I was stuck here crying to myself
Thinking it shouldn't have ended this way

Let's be real
My poetry isn't what it use to be
I use to write these poetic lines that made you nod your head to the beat
Made you rise from your seat and do a 360 just to hear me speak
But now if that is what you seek
I'm sorry to disappoint but all you will see is me struggling
Living the recession to the fullest
Unable to connect the dots that float right in front of me
Yes, this is one of those stories
About how one of the greats have fallen from the heavens he once resided
The only difference is I was never a great
I'm just a simple minded being who seeks peace for society's sake
But that's kind of hard when society gets off on war
Creating these war torn third world countries who can't even breathe the air they live off on
Then again I'm only 18 so who am I to call out society and its perfect system that has been in play for centuries
So let me just close my mouth now and send you on your marry little way
But before I go there is just one last thing I would like to say

Act now before it is too late.

I don't know what I'm doing anymore
I just wanna go splat all over the wall
I wanna cut my chest wide open
Then say goodbye to it all
I been through so much recently
When I haven't even got over my past
So why don't I just die already
Just close my eyes and rot away
Cause I don't know what I'm doing anymore
I just wanna go splat all over the wall
Write my death note with my own blood
Then disappear in a puddle in the hall