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Nina Campos Feb 2015
The clock ticks while your once soft tight skin sags around the corners of your mouth.
The smooth feeling of your forehead now aligned with the signature of age.
My eyes stay fixed with your lovely brown as you grey.
I will always love you.
A bit more personal
Nina Campos Jul 2018
Beautiful cardinal
I have summoned you here
The passion in your fathers
That draw to my remember
Fly to heaven
Bring home the pain
Beautiful cardinal
I wish you could stay
Nina Campos Feb 2015
When you’re an artist you’re taught to critique masterpieces.
“What could you change about this piece?”
“Can you identify the medium?”
“What is the artist’s message?”
I’ve gutted dozens of artworks.
I ran through the lists identifying the
flaws and pin pointing the meanings.
But then I was struck with a piece
so beautiful that not even God
himself could view it for too long.
I searched for any flaw, I looked for the medium and was unlucky in my persuit. Though my peers could easily critique the piece, I could not.
The more time I spent with this art
It became even harder. So I started
searching for a meaning.
What was evident in my search was to stop looking. I figured I needed this piece in my home, but the price was far too high for my income.
I saved every penny I had, but with he competing bidders the price just rose and I fell short. Plagued by grief I finally realized that when you crave something so wonderful and unforgettable, you must keep trying to hold it dear.
From that day on I have not critiqued another piece, I’ve found my job unsatisfying.
I’ve been given a choice to let the piece go, but how could I let something so angelic fall into the crevices of hell?
more of a story
Nina Campos Feb 2015
I'm tired of finding a home and having it torn down while I'm chained to the tree in the yard and I can't quite meet the fragile pieces. My house was built on concrete and sinks like it was built on sand.
Maybe it's me who's built on sand, maybe I'm just designed to sink. Maybe I shouldn't be clawing my way up back to the surface. Maybe I should just be consumed.
my mind wanders
Nina Campos Feb 2015
You were the first hit.
The sting of the needle.  
The hole rips into the pale, white forearm flesh leaving a constant reminder that I said "This is the last time."
When it wasn't.
I just wished I never picked you up.
I wish I never held you so dearly.
I wish you were as safe as drugs.
Eat
Nina Campos Jul 2018
Eat
You need to be, to be beautiful
But I can’t
My tears in the dark make me ugly
My insides are rotting
My heart is icing
Like on a cake
But I ate too much
You tell me how I shake the world
And it hurts me
My bones break
My back bends
My muscles hurt
I still keep up with your requests
You want me to be beautiful
But I can’t change how you make me feel
Nina Campos Jan 2016
The wreck you caused has left a hole inside my chest cavity.
They said it was a twist of fate but I don't believe it.
They said you were the beautiful flower that got picked before it could even brown.
Well, **** accidents.
**** fate.
**** flowers.
I'd give anything to feel the warmth of your chest and arms grasping onto my soul in the dead of night.
Rest in piece to you, my love.
081115
Nina Campos Feb 2015
You'll have moments when you think you're over it
Then you'll have some where you're crying on the bathroom floor at 2 am.
Nina Campos May 2018
I smile for you
For the times you held me close
When you whisper sweet nothings to me
I smile for you
Knowing so many loved you
Knowing who loves you
I smile for you
When I eat my favorite meal
When you tried to re create it
I smile for you
Knowing your heart was full
Knowing you aren’t in pain
I smile for you
When I see that picture
When I hear that song
I cry for you, knowing you’re gone.
Nina Campos Apr 2016
The moment

Turn to the right

How beautiful you looked fixed on me
The creases of your face fit so perfectly
So many questions I had
So many answers you gave
The moment I turned to the right
Lost in your chocolate soul
I'm so sorry you didn't get to grow old
The way you laugh bounces through my ear drums
Spirals out of control
My life without you
Background knowledge:
Almost all of my writing is about this man, this deserved to have an explanation of how we met
Nina Campos Feb 2015
Looking into your eyes at 5 am wondering how we made it through the night.
But looking into your eyes has given me the answer.
Nina Campos Feb 2015
I tell you I love you and you say "okay"
You tell me you that you don't know what you want. I say "okay"
You tell me I'm not physically pleasing and I need to change. I say "okay"
I tell you ill change. You say "okay"
You tell me "can you spend the night?"
I say "no"
I know you just wanted to sleep but I can't take it anymore I'm not okay we are not okay. We can't wake up and be okay.  We will never
Be
Okay
Nina Campos Feb 2015
Every fiber of you
       still lingers
          in every fiber of me.
I love holding your cold hands.
Nina Campos Feb 2015
Releasing endorphins
Not because of you.
Nina Campos Mar 2015
I hate the way you make words roll down my tongue like a ball on a hill.
I hate how gravity pulls me back into your unwelcoming embrace everytime I stand up.
I hate how your narrow understanding pushes me into the cracking foundation of our fate.
You broke me, congratulations
Nina Campos May 2015
we don't make our homes in hotels
so why am i holding these keys?
i still miss you
Nina Campos Jun 2016
Is the suffering adequate?
Cauterize the wound you left
So it doesn't infect my stability
Is the suffering adequate?
Nina Campos Apr 2015
"I do not want you anymore"
The words ring through your ears like church bells on Sunday morning.
Your internal organs do a 360 ringing out all the words hes ever said from your veins.
You scream why in your head as he says "because"  
Tears start streaming down your face while you're being tied to the railroad tracks and heartbreak is rounding the corner at full speed.
He left you there.
right when you thought he wouldn't.
Nina Campos Feb 2015
your soul is my burden.
Just a thought
Nina Campos Feb 2015
"I promise"
The words bending out of your sinister mouth trailing up to your crooked eyes.
"I promise, I'm sorry"
How many times can you repeat two words?
"I promise, please. Don't go"
I can still hear the echo of my tears crawling down your shoulders while your eyes stay fixated on the lines you knowingly caused.
"Wait. I promise."
                                        "at least i keep mine. "
its been years but i can hear your voice so clearly.
Nina Campos May 2018
I get high to forget why I lay next to him and sob quietly
I get high so my heart doesn’t feel like it’s falling
I get high to stop the thoughts keeping me up
I get high to forgive myself
I get high to forget myself

— The End —