You have absolutely every reason to hate me right now.

But you still told me that you love me and that you're happy I'm by your side.

And if that is not true love, I don't know what is.

I need you
                 Like a book needs punctuation
I need you
                 Like a best friend in isolation
I need you
                 Like a song needs a beat
I need you
                 Like a runner without feet
I need you
                 Like a forest needs rain
I need you
                 Like a window without a glass pane

I've never been able to yell
or scream at someone.
No matter how angry,
or how hurt I am.

It's a blessing
and a curse.

I live to please.
But who?
Myself? Certainly not.

Sometimes I get so angry
that I want to lash out.
Break something, throw
something against the wall.

Watch something shatter so I know
what it looks like inside my heart.

I pick up a jar, ready to hurl it at
a stone wall.
But just as soon as my arm pitches back,
it falls slowly to the ground.

I sink to my knees and the jar clicks softly
against the ground as I place it next to me.

Soft sobs raking through my body
As if on their own angry rampage.

Fingers dig into my hair, pushing it away
from my face, so that I may see clearly.

To see the unbroken jar still sitting peacefully
next to my hand, now flat on the concrete.

Sometimes the hardest battles are fought alone
at night
when it's dark
and quiet.
I haven't even been typing for more than a few seconds
and already the tears are flowing.
Too strong for too long.
That's what they say, right?
Crying does not mean you're weak
it means you have been too strong for too long.
What *******.
I am weak.
I know I am.
Broken angel
hurt so many times
by those who were meant to protect.
Walls have been put up to protect myself since no one else
seemed to care enough to save
the five year old little girl.
Eleven years later and I'm cold and hard as stone.
I wish I were a stone..
Instead of this **** sponge who is destined
to be poked and prodded.
I will soak up your mess,
so you don't have to suffer.
Give me your worries, I will take them.
Give me your addictions, I will take them.
Give me your broken shards, I will take them.
I don't care if I get cut and scraped.
Let me bleed-
so you can live.

Bulimia is a scary thing.
That is a fact.
She'll cradle and choke you.
But she'll get rid of the fat.

Bulimia is a scary thing.
But this is for sure-
The burning in your throat and mouth
Will not be the only sore.

Bulimia is a scary thing.
Late at night when you're alone
She'll be with you
Kneeling at the porcelain thrown.

Bulimia is a scary thing.
Because very soon
She'll have you dreaming
Of being a thinspo.