Each night while awaiting sleep's ******,
Thoughts emerge from their darkened lair
To walk the shores of eternal hope,
Only to sink in seas of despair

How often I've searched for Love's footprints --
An effort my heart must find droll;
Have winds of Time carelessly plundered
All memories of Love from Life's scroll?

To recall just one brief encounter
That somehow escaped memory
Would bring such joy to my dismal world --
To know someone once cared for me

A faint voice echoing  "I love you"
Would more than suffice to repair
These tattered wings that once ferried hope . . .
But alas! the heart's chamber is bare

And so I appeal to sleep's mercy
As I lie upon this lonely bed:
Carry me swiftly beneath thy wing
To a realm where heartaches dare not tread

Then all of my senses surrender
As I welcome night's peaceful repose,
And tear-moistened lips softly murmur:
Please, let this day come to a close!

Tonight I'll pour my favorite wine,  
Then set the hearth's kindling ablaze;
Countless hours will be spent pondering
The past's carefree and  blissful days

There I am!  a girl of just twenty,
With nimble step and flying hair;
Searching for love, I was confident --
As for suitors, I had my fair share

Flowers and flattery and romance
Would frequently call at my door;
Youthful days filled with Love's promise . . .
Even Heaven could offer no more!

The men were handsome, witty and fun,
Showing utmost propriety;
Strangely, I turned my back to them all --
Not one stirred Love's passion in me

But Time paid no heed to my folly,
And one by one my dreams went astray;
The shining rays of hope had grown dim --
Too often I'd turned Love away

Now each night my heart reprimands me,
Repeating "O, what have you done?"
Mistrust and indecision be ******!
I curse, and then cry for The One  

Now I watch the sun slowly descending
Deep into the Sea of Remorse;
Have I been condemned to this anguish,
Or might Fate kindly alter its course?

But the flames of hope turn to embers
As I sit alone sipping my wine,
I know somewhere there's a lonely man . . .
The One who should have been mine!

I provide calm after you rile the storm,
You stir the hornets, while I fight the swarm

You curse the darkness - I kindle the flame,
And should you stumble,  you say I'm to blame

A song sung by two must have harmony,                                                  
But you think my songs are always off-key;

Try as I may to meet your every need,
No feast I prepare can appease your greed

How can we survive rough seas and fierce gales
In a boat with split masts and tattered sails?

Well, change is coming, and I'll not pretend
That I'm sad to see this fiasco end

And I see glory in the coming days --
A new horizon is flaunting  its rays;

This game is over,  I'll not be the pawn.
You are insufferable  . . .  and I am gone!

Too long I've implored Love's ministry,
Too long grim silence has reigned;
If Love would only beckon to me
No bonds could keep me constrained

What foolishness might I contemplate,
Deeming it necessity?
Through weeds and thorns, barefoot I would run,
If Love should beckon to me

Ignoring the rules of Good Judgment,
And placing my trust in Chance,
I'd fly to Love, bounding all hurdles,
With nary a backward glance

So weary am I of solitude,
So bereft of joy and hope;
Time has carried all my dreams of Love
To realms far beyond my heart's scope

But I've heard that Love can resurrect
A dream lying cold in its grave;
And so I cling to that beacon of hope,
Despite all the tears that I gave

I want to feel the euphoria
Of falling under Love's spell;
(Pay no heed to the years that I wear --
Youth had its own tales to tell)

Yes, at times Love can seem indifferent --
Cruel and willfully cunning;
But I'll be neither judge nor jury . . .
Should Love beckon, I'll come running!

A sweet  smile greets all who meet her,
With no hint of the pain concealed;
But her poems paint a self-portrait,
Where the truth is boldly revealed

Each word that her pen releases
Is a fateful stroke of the brush:
Sunlit paths that led to dark places,
The brief joys that Fate chose to crush

Sad tales are etched with precision
Upon this warped canvas of Time,
Describing the heartaches that linger,
Urging her to cloak them in rhyme

Are lonely days not distressing
Enough  for this painter of verse?
And yet night deprives her of slumber,
As memories refuse to disperse

But pity offers no solace --  
Fate's cruelty has taken its toll,
Leaving her to walk this Earth alone
With weary heart and blighted soul

Playing Life's dubious Game of Love
She was nothing more than a pawn;
Well does she know her fate has been sealed . . .
Long ago her portrait was drawn

I'm staring at a blank sheet of paper
     on the desk in front of me,  
It's just begging to embrace a new poem,
     but I have this theory:
I'll prove I'm stronger than this silly urge
     to be seduced by a rhyme;
I'll not surrender to such balderdash,
     my self-control is sublime;
A smug little smile creeps over my face --
     but O, how the urge beckons . . .
O, Lord, I must write!  Self-control be ******!
Well, that took all of ten seconds

They say 'tis better to have loved and lost
Than never to have known love at all;
They have no clue what this sampling may cost . . .
Love can cause empires to rise and fall!
A heart, once content, becomes tempest-tossed,
Each little cloudburst feels like a squall;
I'd rather my lonely sea not be crossed ---
My heart won't be a fickle love's port of call!

The sun arose, its duties to uphold  
In its usual, resplendent style.
While flaunting its rays of orange and gold,  
Proudly it rose, with an unsettling guile.  
But I wasn't moved by this garish display,  
For I find no joy since love went away  

And why does the moon glimmer so brightly?
The sun and moon --- a heartless duet!
I find their demonstrations unsightly,
A disgraceful breach of etiquette;
Such indifference causes me agony,
For I find no joy since Love turned from me

Just listen to those warblers in that tree--
Their once-welcomed songs lack appeal;
How dare they sing amidst my misery . . .
How can my broken heart hope to heal?
O, forgive my tone so doleful and wry,
But I find no joy since Love said good-bye

Come, Love, fly homeward to my heart once more --
Heal the dying dreams of yesterday;
Don't leave me standing alone on Life's shore --
(I'd rather the tide swept me away!)
Even Angels in their heavenly lair
If bereft of Love would flee in  despair!
          
But life marches on the same as before --
And the Earth still orbits the sun,
And each day my heart breaks a little more
Facing solitude when day is done;
Though fearing derision, I'll not be coy . . .
To live without Love is to live without joy!

I finally have to admit it,
Though it brings a mountain of grief,
Despite his look of innocence,
The man that I love is a thief!

It all began when first we met ---
To my surprise he stole my heart;
But the man cannot help himself . . .
He's cunningly skilled in this art

In daylight hours or dark of night
His boldness astonishes me!
He'll steal a kiss, then take my love . . .
(I'm in awe of his strategy)

While whispering sweet things in my ear
He then steals my will to resist;
And when he leaves I'm robbed of peace ---
(In his absence, threats still exist)

My dearest thief, please be assured,
There is no need to steal from me;
Simply ask me for what you want . . .
I'll give it to you willingly!

My heart throbbed with Love's expectations
As he pressed his lips to my ear;
Passion's voice eagerly whispered
Forbidden words I longed to hear

Each kiss evoked thrills beyond measure ---
How they left me gasping for air;
But, O, when his face rested on mine
And his fingers tangled my hair!

So warm was his breath and his sighing,
Like the embers of passion's fire;
Then a gentle stroke of his hand
Ignited the flames of desire

I smiled as he struggled to tell me
What his eyes so clearly revealed;
But no words had to be spoken --
The fate of our love had been sealed

So close was the blissful surrender,
I could feel the beats of his heart;
So close to ecstasy  . . .  and then,
Suddenly, it all fell apart!

The warbling of a bird awoke me,
Then my eyes caught the sun's first beam;
So close had I come to Heaven . . .
But it was no more than a  dream

I heard the cries of his broken heart --
How it begged for the pain to cease!
So compelling was its lament,
I tenderly gathered each piece

The moon glowed with a pale radiance
As he revealed his doleful plight:
The scornful deceit of a woman
Caused hope and trust to take flight

Each word he spoke flew like a dagger,
Piercing my heart mercilessly;
My own despair, caused by cruel deceit,
Was a blight on Love's memory

In our pain we found a common link --
Hearts doomed to deceit's damnation;
But Fate's course was soon to be altered . . .
O, sweet joy of liberation!

Unhappy memories flew from our hearts
As if on the wings of a dove;
And deceitful lies melted like snow
Upon the sacred fires of our love

Now a joyous dawn greets us each day,
Pain and woe are in full retreat;
On this twisted, rocky path called Life
True Love's radiance now guides our feet

Don't idly sing love songs to the wind ---
A troubled heart might be lurking near;
What a loathsome task to have to rescind
Loving words it was not meant to hear

Tread with caution, lest you wake the beast
That's held captive in some desperate heart;
When from its ******* Hope has been released,
It becomes fair game for Cupid's dart

Crumbs of Love that are carelessly tossed
Might be hungrily devoured in haste;
Once that bridge to Paradise has been crossed,
O, what pain when steps must be retraced!

Use due caution before you declare
Unwavering love to a distraught heart;
Deceitful words, though delivered with flair,
Carry the sting of a poisoned dart

Words of love are messengers of Hope
That allow earthbound hearts to take flight;
But lies and deceit weave the fatal rope
That binds lonely hearts to their sad plight

Our winter sun has set ---
The days grow shorter now;
The love that we share brings not one regret,
And so I make this vow:

I shall remember you
When through that dark abyss
I journey alone, as we all must do,
When doomed by Death's vile kiss

And when you've reached Death's shore,
Marooned by Life's fierce tide,
I'll search for you, and mournfully implore
Quick passage to your side

My cries will resonate
Throughout Eternity,
And if there be a Divine Magistrate,
I'll beg on bended knee

And as I seek your hand
In realms extraordinaire,
What joy will be mine in that foreign land
To find you waiting there

Death's mandates may be stern
But Love need not obey,
For Love defies Death, showing no concern
For Life's sad yesterday

And we'll not flinch at chance,
Nor will despair dictate;
In this realm of eternal circumstance
Love has no fear of Fate

And how we shall rejoice
When our souls reunite
To bear witness to and vow with one voice
The Love that Death could not smite!

Somehow you wandered into my world ---
I don't know how you found your way!
The path was unmarked and overgrown,
No welcome signs were on display

I kept my door locked, and curtains drawn,
No light streamed from the window pane;
And yet, you dared to knock at my door
And enter my dreary domain

But now that you're here I realize
How wretched loneliness can be;
And I give thanks to the Star of Love
That guided your footsteps to me

Ponderous stones of distrust and fear
Weighed on my heart many a day;
Somehow you trampled those stones to dust,
And Love gently blew them away

Winds of despair extinguished Love's fire,
But somehow you relit the flame;
Now I find myself reaching for dreams
I never thought I could reclaim

Yes, dark clouds still gather overhead ---
Life must pander to misery;
But since you wandered into my world . . .
Somehow, it doesn't matter to me

When Life's darkest clouds gather over me,
I seek shelter from impending storms;
Curtains are drawn closed, all the doors secured ---
And soon Life's grotesque profile transforms

Darkness spreads its arms like a faithful friend,
Offering comfort and asylum here;
(I'd rather not see what lurks in the light --
What we can't see we tend not to fear)

In my solitude, peace and harmony
Join to banish thoughts of bitterness;
Soon yesterday's pains fade and slip away ---
Precious gift of sweet Forgetfulness!

And should the anguish prove unbearable
My beleaguered soul succumbs to prayer;
Please, don't pity me . . . I've been here before . . .
Misery always seeks its darkest lair

But I find that Time, with its healing hands
Soothes and calms the tempests of the mind,
And from my shelter I emerge, renewed,
Leaving Life's most loathsome hours behind

Soon I'll set sail for an unknown shore,
So I've rigged the mast as best I could,
My destination's a mystery . . .
And I fear -- maybe more than I should

If turbulent waves capsize my boat
That would be the least of my fears,
For I've survived the vagaries of Love --
More than once I've drowned in my own tears

At times I've tripped on Love's tangled vines,  
So I'm not concerned I might fall;
Life's storms battered me relentlessly,
But I stood fast and weathered them all

Death may inflict nights as black as coal,
Freezing winds that could turn flames to ice;
But Life's fickle ways have tempered me
For just such reckless rolls of the dice

But who's to say what perils may lurk
In the darkness of Death's corridor;
Will peace prevail, or some unknown dread
When my eyes close and I breathe no more?

Knowing I must break my bond with Earth,
Just the notion shakes me to the core . . .
Taken from this world against my will,
Exiled from my home  . . . forevermore!

Nighttime grants imagination its wings
To soar far above the day's common things,
And as my lids gently veil weary eyes,
A voice in my head whispers lovely lies:

"Come, dear, make haste! This day's in retreat,
The hour of enchantment now lies at your feet;
Let your dreams run wild -- command what you will,
Sing passion's song!  .  .  .  though Love's own voice be still"

Whispered desires summon gentle hands
To caress and embrace, as love demands;
A warm breath turns into a searing kiss --
A seductive touch,  a moment of bliss

Each fantasy I conceive becomes real,
(These are the moments that Fate cannot steal;
Though flaunting its might, it has not the power
To slay these thoughts or vandalize this hour)

And so with golden threads of make-believe,
Romantic overtures are mine to weave;
Such love is mine till night opens the door
To the sun's first rays . . . . .  then love is no more

Few are the times Love knocked at my door,
     but they've all escaped my memory;
No enchanting poems stirred in my core --
No grand tributes to Love's mystery

But when despair extinguishes hope's flame,
     what salient words drip from my pen;
It's then that my heart, wounded and lame,
     unveils its poetic acumen

Is this why misery commands free rein ---
     just to appease Fate's poetic lust?
The tyranny of anguish and pain
     gives hesitant verse that final ******

Try to visualize agony pent
     in the depths of a desolate heart;
Now sketch the face of that vile torment . . .
Soon the pain becomes a work of art

Too often deceitful hearts will lure
     trusting hearts, blinding them with false love;
Great is the anguish they must endure . . .
     but it's the poems that I'm thinking of!

Passion-filled verses mix and combine
     like the paints in a grand masterpiece
     when the shattered heart tries to confine
     rage and bitterness seeking release
    
And yet, Love that survives Fate's brutal shove ---
The fortress that refuses to fall ---
Those words that proclaim undying love
     become the grandest poems of all!

As twilight's deep shadows were falling,
A spirit voice whispered in my ear
A message that I found most enthralling,
Which I'll now repeat for all to hear:

"Love is a treasure we must cherish
Above all else, lest it soon be lost
Among baubles and gemstones most garish,
And fool's gold that was not worth the cost

Unlike diamonds, Love does not glisten,
Yet what radiance beams from tear-filled eyes
As desolate hearts eagerly listen
To Love's gentle whisperings and sighs

Love is a divine commodity ---
Inexplicable is its power,
As baffling as an ancient mystery,
Bringing joy to each waking hour

Cling tightly to this treasure called Love ---
Unequaled is the bliss that it brings,
For its value is rated well above
All the gaudy wealth of queens and kings

If bejeweled fingers fill your glove,
Cast aside these trifling, worthless themes;
Set your sights on the riches forged from Love . . .
You'll know wealth beyond your wildest dreams"

Knowing that Life rides a stormy sea
And cloudbursts oftentimes overwhelm,
I'll rig the sails and face what may be . . .
If Love is standing guard at the helm

Fearlessly I'll walk Life's thorny path
In the dark of night or sunless day;
I'll grapple with Fate's relentless wrath . . .
If Love 's blessed radiance guides my way

And when despair grabs hold of my hand,
Gallantly I'll cry my share of tears
While waiting for storm clouds to disband . . .
If Love's at my side to calm my fears

When all seems lost and hope goes astray,
And my dreams lie withering on the vine,
I'll endure and rise above the fray . . .
If Love's hand is clinging fast to mine

When my spirit flees this mortal frame
And is summoned toward the dark unknown,
I'll fare well enough with memory's flame    . . .
If Love lingers when all else has flown

A seed of Love that never found
The hallowed path to fertile ground,
The fruitless trees, the orchard bare ---
Bitter pain of unanswered prayer

A tired heart, trampled by Love's feet
Dolefully yields in utter defeat;
No eyes gaze upon its despair.
Although unseen, the pain is there

An outstretched hand that no one holds
As night's obsidian cloak unfolds;
Mournful sobs permeate the air---
O, what pain! And no one to share

Hours of blissful happiness
Followed by guile's fatal caress;
Wretched pain of Love's sad farewell . . .
O, what stories the past could tell!

Though such reminiscing brings regret,
Still, the heart whispers "Never forget,"
And so to Love's treachery we're resigned,
And journey on  . . .  with pain close behind

When a tree waves its green leafy hand,
Most don't notice, but I understand;
The swaying of a flower, the buzz of a bee . . .
That's how my garden beckons to me

The little blades of grass gently nod
As a worm pokes his head through the sod;
Cast blame if you will on my vanity,
But I'm certain he's looking for me

Now the wind wants to join in the game --
Spying a windchime, it takes careful aim;
Soon the air fills with a soft melody,
And I smile, knowing it's playing for me

I watch as the sun sweeps clouds away,
Showing off with such gaudy display;
But I must admit, the sun's victory
Causes the flowers to dance with glee

And I stand in awe amidst this scene
Of peace and beauty.  If I were a Queen
What nobler entitlement could there be
Than these treasures unfurled before me?

A warble suddenly hushes life's din,
And soon more feathered minstrels join in;
But such incidents are no mystery . . .
That's just my garden calling to me

My pen hovers over a blank page
As red ink drips from my wounded heart;
When bitter thoughts flow like Spring's melting snow,
A dark narrative soon fills the chart

O, please forgive the gray clouds that ensue,
But in my world sunny skies are rare;
And many a night I ponder my plight --
But no comforting words stir the air

When love's anguish cannot be constrained,
Then the heart must transcribe its lament;
Sad thoughts find release, bringing a strange peace
That's absent when heartache is pent

A bit of salt may blanket my words ---
Not of the sea and its restless tide
That comes and goes, free of all cares and woes --
But from tears these weary eyes have cried

How much must a heart invest in love
Before it receives a dividend?
Though it pays the toll, it can't reach its goal . . .
Too often, the signpost reads "Dead End"

I pray the Court of Love intervenes,
And this cruel decree be overturned!
Might there be one flower in this sunset hour
Yet to blossom  . . .  or has court adjourned?

I've no need to seek divine deity.
Seeing a glorious sunrise spread its light,
I bow in awe at this amazing feat -----
A solitary star vanquished the night.
O, the majesty of Nature's might!

And as the moon dims his silvery torch,
Feathered minstrels open sleepy eyes;
What choristers could sing a sweeter song?
(To mention angel choirs would be unwise ---
Never have their voices filled the skies)

Rainbow-hued flowers, their heads bending low
To the gentle stroking of a breeze,
Fill the air with a hypnotic scent
And the humming of delighted bees . . .
It is to such things I bend my knees

Then upward my eyes are suddenly drawn
To vaporous clouds drifting lazily,
And I ponder that enigmatic realm,
Hesitant to unfold its mystery.
(Could this be God's true identity?)

Crickets chirping, wolves baying at the moon,
From the pond, a frog croaks his opinion;
The ocean's roar, the Autumn woods ablaze ---
And over it all we have dominion.
And yet . . . I feel I'm Nature's minion

But if an elusive God is your choice,
I look upon you with  pitying eyes;
Marvels surround you, and yet you still seek
That obscure and silent, unresponsive prize . . .
An unseen God that common sense denies!

I dared not hope to glimpse Heaven
Nor sit on Contentment's throne;
A darkened abyss was my domain
And Love's radiance unknown

There was no cause for dreams to stir
Or my senses to run wild;
The indifferent ebb and flow of Life
Left my weary heart beguiled

I preferred the grave to this fate,
But you rolled away the stone
And drew forth my cold exhausted breath,
Replacing it with your own

Quietly you opened the door
To my heart and entered in;
Your loving words, spoken faint and low
Spread joy where sorrow had been

Like the muted flutter of wings
That guide a bird to its mate
Came the gentle whisperings of Love,
Silencing the voice of Fate

And so this heart, dying in degrees
(Lifeless though it seemed to be)
Bounded with glee when it heard your voice . . .
At last!  Love had called to me!

Everchanging winds of discontent
Paint temptation an alluring hue;
Gilded words softly caress my ear --
O, what anxious impulses ensue!
But then something draws me back to you

Sweetest intimations tease my heart,
Drenching my thoughts like the morning's dew;
Invitations to romance entice . . .
Dare I venture down this avenue?
Certainly not!  let this thought pass through!

The flames of temptation stoke desires
That only fealty's promise can subdue;
But the embers must not be ignored --
If unguarded,  they'll blaze up anew
And soon unfaithfulness makes its debut

Lips that have been parched by burning sighs
Quiver when a fount comes into view;
How ardently I could quench my thirst,
How inviting this seductive brew . . .
But then something draws me back  to you

Temptation exudes such sweet perfume ---
How easily a vow can go askew;
But the door to my heart is secure,
And my conscience remains free of rue . . .
Your love's tender power binds me to you

Just as the bee hums his serenade
To the rose blushing with wild delight,
Let soft murmurings flow from your lips --
Speak to me of Love . . . come thrill my night

Every spoken word becomes a flower
(Even Angels smile when you speak low;
Though divine, they cannot comprehend
How my garden blooms in winter's snow)

Love can transform time and circumstance,
Foster hope when mercy's spring runs dry;
Midst torrential rains the sun still shines,
Rainbows stretch across the midnight sky

Yet, when anguish takes aim at my heart,
Piercing it with grim accuracy,
How your words bestow Love's healing balm
Still remains a mystery to me!

How can words of Love possess such power?
When true love resides in the heart's core,
Then the words that flow are absolute,
And this pain-filled world exists no more

Carry me to that enchanted realm
Where we'll join the blessed throngs above;
I have no doubt that Heaven exists
When you whisper your sweet words of Love

Somewhere there's a man who walks alone,
Finding mercy in the  pounding rain;
What a clever way to hide his tears,
With devious deceit he masks his pain!
But the lonely do what they must do,
Casting aside Reason's guiding rein

So a woman walks down moonlit streets,
Her echoing steps amidst the crowd;
Tired eyes scan each face, seeking the man
That would  wrap her in Love's envied shroud;
I know, for her shadow is my own,
Weary in my search, but head unbowed

Onward we press in pursuit of Love,
Walking in a melancholy trance;
When a tender smile is cast our way,
Or perhaps a warm inviting glance,
Love's untrodden shore comes within view,
Bringing glorious visions of romance

Time will not tame passion such as ours,
We have dreams defeat cannot smother;
We'll lay claim to Love the years denied
As a child claims Love from its mother;
For when such hearts join, bliss is assured ---
Lord knows we were made for each other!

Pondering the gnarled vineyards at twilight,
   it is for their rare fruit that I long.
The vines have survived many a drought and blight,
   rendering them sensitive but strong

The fruits of old love are tender and sweet,
   having  learned to endure sun and shade;
Gleaning fortitude from gales, snow and sleet,
   their true value's been measured and weighed

Old love seeks the beauty that veils the heart --
The wrinkled face and the graying hair
  matter not;  Yet, what a sting they impart
  to the lonely caught in Time's cruel snare

Observe the pearl fishers -- they're not concerned
   with the oyster's shell, but with the prize
   that's dwelling deep inside, for they have learned
   precious gems lurk in cunning disguise

Satisfying are the fruits of old love ---
   so patiently they wait to be claimed
   by soft, wizened hands, gentle as a dove,
   yet revealing passion, unashamed

Because of all the sorrows and the tears
   and the many heartaches left untold,
   love that has withstood the test of the years
   is a love that's worth its weight in gold

How blessed are we who can see love's sweet truth
   unfolding before our very eyes;
We don't need the exuberance of youth
   to yield to love's call 'neath star-filled skies

Old love has had its feet held to the fire,
   and it emerged, still able to stand;
It survived the bogs of life's muck and mire . . .
What more can be said?  Old love is grand!

Someone knows when your day has been filled
with memories too painful to keep;
Someone wanders through your dreams at night
  sweeping away sad thoughts while you sleep

Someone knows when you have awakened
  to find dark clouds hanging above you;
Someone knows of your deep loneliness,
  and waits in the shadows to love you

Someone knows of the crosses you bear,
  and the hills that you climb are so steep;
Someone's arms are outstretched lest you fall
  as through each trial and error you leap

Someone knows there are quiet meadows
  where peace and tranquility abound,
Someone will hold your hand while you search,
  and walk with you till that path is found

Someone knows an ember faintly glows
  in your heart where love used to abide;
Someone wants to fan that sleeping flame
  and awaken love too long denied

Someone knows Heaven exists on Earth --
  a place free of loneliness and woes;
Someone wants to take you to that realm,
  loving you till your heart overflows

Someone knows that these dreams are in vain,
   for sadly you're unable to see
That the flame of love burns bright for you
In someone's heart . . . and that someone is me!

I was awakened from a restless sleep
By a spectre at the foot of my bed;
The curtains were parted, the moon shone bright
Forming a halo around his head

There was a strange familiarity,
And boldly I bid him come nearer,
That look of anguish, those desolate eyes --
Things I've often seen in my mirror

What pity I felt for this transient guest
With the moonlight on him overspread,
He said not a word, but I seemed to know
Why he stood at the foot of my bed

I extended my arms and drew him close
And held him while he cried through the night;
Obeying the sun, the moon summoned the stars,
And with dawn's first rays they all took flight

Once again a new day found me alone,
But what strange thoughts circled 'round my head:
Had I been dreaming, or had there indeed
Appeared this phantom beside my bed?

There was a presence in my room that night ---
The Spirit of Love's longed-for caress;
And the pillow under my head was moist
With tears of defeat and hopelessness.
So throbs the deep wound of Reality . . .
I'd been embracing my own loneliness!

As night spreads its ribbons of darkness
Loneliness taps at my window pane,
But too lost in reverie am I
To pay heed to its doleful refrain

Wishful thinking helps me to escape
From the madness of Life's fickle ways;
Though make-believe is a tangled web,
I thrive in its ethereal haze

How sweet the proverbial nectar
That flows from his lips onto mine;
What bliss I derive from a romance
Only my wild impulse could design

I swoon at his expressions of love
Sung and spoken in poetic verse;
(Though at times my heart scoffs at pretense,
Seeing not a  blessing, but a curse)

Yet, when I gaze deep into his eyes
I thrill to see love's reflection there;
He need only take hold of my hand
And together we climb Heaven's stair

O, how painful  are the loveless hours
Of reality I must endure;
In my dreary solitude I find
Wishful thinking holds a strange allure

Ah! but then reality holds sway ---
Once again the snake devours the dove;
But wishful thinking soon restores my peace
With its exquisite mimicry of love!

I'm needing you like a rose needs the rain  ---
Her relief from the sun's burning shawl;
In mute despair she implores the sky,
Begging mercy with her silent call;
And O, what joy when that errant cloud
Hovers o'er,  and the rain starts to fall!

I'm needing you like a bird needs its wings
To ascend to a loftier perch
To scan the skies for its missing mate
In its frantic and desperate search;
(When the object of worship is absent,
How meaningless the choir and the church)

I'm needing you like the tide needs the shore
To find respite from the raging sea;
O, I need you in so many ways --
This rant could go on endlessly;
But should these words fail in their intent . . .
How incompetent my poetry!

As clouds disperse along the eastern sky,
A reluctant sun slants its first ray;
No dew-kissed rose summons the thirsting bee,
Cheerless birdsong heralds the new day

How feeble and deficient this sunrise!
Once-resplendent beams now dimly glow,
And the bee, unable to sate his thirst,
To the wind murmurs his tale of woe

Nature's attuned to my pitiful plight --
(Love's absence disrupts life's harmony)
Though prayers prove fruitless, might Fate intercede . . .
Or is solitude my destiny?

What anxiety throbs within this breast!
(Once love and joy were the sole tenants)
Now, as I strain to hear love's distant voice,
Fear and doubt impose their harsh penance

Tendrils of gloom and desolation twist
'Round me tightly like a clinging vine,
Delivering a sense of foreboding --
Fear that love will never more be mine  

True, the future cannot be prophesied,
And so I keep vigil at Hope's gate;
Though doubt and despair mock my foolishness,
I've placed my trust in the hands of Fate

I scoffed at lovers playing their foolish games,
Driven to a frenzied state of mind,
"Come join us" they cried, "come fan passion's flames!"
But I declined

How I envied the hearts that love had healed
While my own heartaches I bravely masked;
If only my sad plight could be revealed . . .
But no one asked

Like tender warblings of amorous birds
Hope whispers sweet lies into my ear.
Still, Fate stubbornly withholds those three words
I long to hear

While tears may come easily, I refrain ---
How effective is this strategy?
Except for my heart, no one knows of my pain . . .
What irony!

Will Fate honor its debts long overdue?
Or are faith and hope but mockery
Of the worn-out promise that dreams do come true?
Then woe is me!

But too well I know I've myself to blame,
I scoffed at Love, now I'm paying the price;
Yet, it's hard to say who'll win at Love's game --
Fate rolls the dice!

The uncaring winds blow harshly now,
But there was a time they caressed me
As gently as love's kiss on my brow,
And O, how the  God of Love blessed me

Love's sweet offerings were mine to take,
Though at times deceit came in disguise;
But I endured it all for love's sake,
(Lover's choices are not always wise)

But those days have long since departed,
Love is but a transient memory;
By sorrow my course is now charted,
And my love-ship sails a lonely sea

Birdsong no longer delights my heart,
Children's laughter now fills me with rue;
But loneliness, being a newly-learned art,
Foretold the anguish that would ensue

Where are the dreams that once stirred in me?
Why do love poems now seem absurd?
I pray this not be my destiny . . .
Yet . . . the voice of Hope speaks not a word!

On that day he came to me
To sorrow I was bound,
Sailing without love's guiding star ---
What little joy I found

Cold and dismal was Hope's  lamp
Until he lit the flame,
What warmth and light surrounded me . . .
Then Heaven spoke my name!

Heaven heard my whispered pleas,
It saw the tears I cried,
It knew my heart's deepest desire . . .
My prayer was not denied

All my doubts  began to fade
Like dew upon the sea;
The latch was raised, the door swung wide . . .
The captive dove was free!

Free was I from doubt and gloom --
Free of fear's tyranny,
As angels strummed their golden lyres
In Divine harmony

Strange, indeed, the power of love ---
A glorious mystery!
My thankful heart will always bless
That day he came to me

A woman's forgiveness, desperately sought
By a man whose rash decision proved unwise;
But mercy's denied - there'll be no second chance.
What a sad account of love's demise!

So goes the tale of two shadows on the wall
That come to life as day draws to a close:
A remorseful man offers a woman
His atonement with a tear-stained rose

She extends her hand, but then withdraws . . .
What he reveals breaks her heart in two;
The man she loves has betrayed her trust,
He's confessed to having been untrue

Uncontrolled tears cascade down her face,
Her hands helplessly fall to her side;
His outstretched arms beg her forgiveness,
But she recoils . . . O, **** her foolish pride!

Discourse ensues amidst sobbing and tears,
Raising her arm, she gestures toward the door;
With lowered  head he reluctantly leaves,
And the tainted rose falls to the floor

There's a lesson to be learned from this tale:
At some point we're all brought to our knees,
Seeking pardon for senseless things we've done
Because of our innate frailties

So offer forgiveness when loved ones repent,
Forgive friends their insensitive rants;
And don't hesitate to forgive yourself . . .
Everyone deserves a second chance!

O, grieving heart, cheer up and sing
Though love only stayed but a short while;
Soon you'll be drinking again from love's spring,
Forgotten will be love's cunning guile

O,  abandoned heart, dry your tears,
Crying will not bring back a lost love;
But reflect on the bliss of bygone years --
Memories are gifts from Heav'n above

O, broken heart, it's time to mend,
In due time you'll come to realize
New love may be waiting around the bend --
Be alert for blessings in disguise!

O, wounded heart, don't try to fly,
Dare not venture forth on broken wings;
Though love's warm glow fails to illume your sky,
Somewhere in the dark a bird still sings

O, mortal heart, your pain will end,
And from Life's shackles you'll be set free;
So let dead love to Heaven's throne ascend . . .
For love has its own eternity

This path, overgrown with briar and brambles,
Thorns and nettles strewn in disarray;
A loathsome path of broken dreams, and yet,
Willingly I walk it each day

This path that hurts not the feet, but the heart,
Where roiling streams overflow their banks,
And burning cinders comingle with ice --
An affirmation of Life's cruel pranks!

What is it that prompts my unwavering steps?
The love that greets me at journey's end!
The ghost of a love lost so long ago
Leaps boundaries only love can transcend

What pain I endure to savor love's bliss!
On this path, blazed by temerity,
I fly past the graveyard of ill-fated  dreams
To a love that defies mortality

How weary I've grown trying to understand
Why such perfect love incurred God's wrath;
And now all that's left are the memories
That await me at the end of this path

I think I could have loved you,
O, how you stoked passion's fire!
Or was it just the madness of Spring
That kindled such wild desire?

Was my lantern's glow too faint
As our ships passed in the night?
Or perhaps Fate extinguished the flame
Before you could see its light

We may well have been lovers
If given the proper chance;
But why did the music stop playing
Before we finished our dance?

The sun has deserted my sky,
Alas! not one beam will descend
To comfort me when chilling gales
Cause the fragile grasses to bend

And the wind seems preoccupied --
But what could it be thinking of?
I swear I heard it whispering:
"Tell me, Lady, where is your love?"

Please don't ask, but help dry my tears
Before night unfurls its cover,
Lest some rude star dares to inquire:
"O Lady, where is your lover?"

The restless moon's searching in vain
For two lovers veiled from his view;
He seeks the Lady and her love,
But tonight I walk without you

Was ours a love too beautiful,
Perhaps taunting the ire of Fate?
O, why did God exile our hearts
From Paradise and lock the gate?

Crashing thunder peals through the clouds,
The wind's moving with dauntless might;
No rainbow will follow this storm . . .
The Lady lost her love tonight

I was too busy loving you
To ever notice the signs . . .
The frost forming in the vineyard,
The snow gathering in the pines

So busy was I loving you,
I didn't notice the smoke;
The fire had burned out long ago,
Leaving only embers to stoke

And then there was that lovely rose
You and I planted in the Spring;
While I was busy loving you,
I failed to see it withering

To our garden, without warning
There came clouds obstructing my sight;
Too busy was I loving you
To foresee the approaching blight

There's nothing left to salvage now,
Just withered vines  where love once grew;
Why did I not see this coming?
I was too busy loving you!

Death nips relentlessly at my heels
Like a mongrel that broke from its chains.
Depart, you thief of cherished flesh,
You've no right yet to my remains!

Keep your distance, mask your putrid scent,
I'm not ready . . . and I reject it.
Of course, I know you'll have your way
Some night when I least expect it

And you'll deliver some lame excuse,
As any deceitful villain would;
Ramble on, vicious Thief of Life,
Your prattle will do you no good

Although despised by one and by all,
Some cruel law has given you free reign
To decide when our transient frames
Shall invade the earthworm's domain

And obey we must -  we have no choice,
Not the meek, not the bold, nor the mild.
Indiscriminate is the soil,
Taking all . . . man, woman and child

For you've never yet lost a battle--
By no regulations are you bound.
I'll object, but you'll still drag me
To your lair deep into the ground

And when that final trumpet blast sounds,
Not a drop of mercy will you show;
Up you'll jump, eager to collect
All that's due you . . . and down we'll go!

Ice still gathers upon the window panes.
Though I keep the hearth ablaze, I fear
In this desolate corner of my world
Spring will be a little late this year

A fear of dread and emptiness prevails
Since the light and warmth of love withdrew,
How will I endure  . . . How can I forget
All the joys of Spring that I once knew?

Now trees raise leafless arms toward the sky,
Shivering without their sleeves of green;
Bewildered birds gaze upon vacant nests,
Sadly pondering the dismal scene

And the flowers . . . what could convince them
To awaken to this hollow gloom?
To what avail would be their blossoming
And the essence of their sweet perfume?

And though I smile, my eyes betray the pain
That stabs at the heart when love is lost;
The sun has battened down its golden doors,
Leaving Hope to tremble in the frost

I'll not see the flowers bloom and go to seed,
Nor hear the nightingale's plaintive call;
And I know, as sure as day turns to night,
Spring will be late . . . if it comes at all

A woman knows when a man loves her,
By Divine Grace she perceives such things;
Even when his love goes undeclared,
She can feel it vibrate her heartstrings

A woman knows when a man loves her,
Her heart opens when he turns the key;
From her face a noble radiance streams
Reflecting love's rare divinity

A woman knows when a man needs her,
Watchful she stands, ready to appease
With wise counsel and devoted love,
Putting both his mind and heart at ease

A woman knows when a man loves her,
She'll nourish  love's seed until it grows
Into their own Garden of Eden.
O, there is no doubt, a woman knows!

What cruel force keeps lovers apart --
Why must each tread a separate path?
Preordained they should never meet . . .
What arbiter inflicts such wrath?  

Two lives hurled into misery,
Two hearts nailed to the same cross;
Never to savor  love's banquet,
They're condemned to feed off life's dross

Spring faintly smiled on these two hearts
As dreams absorbed their youthful hours;
Although  nurtured like tender plants
They yielded naught but withered flowers

Each new day held a ray of Hope,
Dispelling  impatience and doubt;
They kept watch as the flame burned bright . . .
Till finally, their tears put it out

Two hearts dying slow painful deaths,
Each cloaked in its own crimson shroud;
One heart dies, crying silently,
The other sobs its pain aloud

Two lonely hearts ever dreaming
They might stroll Love's Garden one day;
Now resigned, they no longer dream --
Sadly, on Death's threshold they lay

So come forth and ring the death knell --
Come lay your bouquets at their feet;
Mourn if you will such tragedies
While asking  "Why didn't they meet?"

Candlelight illumes my dreary room
Causing shadows to contort and sway;
In my heart there stirs a deep unrest
As the past flaunts its seductive play

Merciful Absinthe! It's known to calm
Tortured hearts by helping them forget;
How the swirling liquids mesmerize . . .
Tears and Absinthe make a strange duet

But my reveries will not be scorned --
I must yield to their silent demand.
And as the Green Fairy warms my throat,
Memories unravel, strand by strand

I recall the little tiffs we had,
Sometimes ending in a full-blown row,
But with each sip that moistens my lips,
I swear, they seem so trivial now

As I drain the glass, warm thoughts of you
Fill my head, causing me to give pause:
Why in Heaven's name did we part ways?
Right now I can't justify the cause

And I miss the good times that we shared,
Not just romance, but the laughter, too;
I thought Absinthe would help me forget,
But tonight . . . tonight I'm missing you

Rarely does someone knock at my door . . .
It may be the darkness that they fear;
Through the open windows my voice resounds,
Perhaps they're startled by what they hear

I do tend to rant in mournful ways,
Maybe at times, a bit too robust,
But this is my voice, and these are my words,
So maintain your distance, if you must

There are those who commune quietly,
Speaking of God and his loving ways;
And those who reminisce about their youth,
Recalling scenes from happier days

But never has God come to my door,
So I have no divine tales to tell;
My youth was simple, passed with nonchalance,
So on this theme I've no need to dwell

But I could speak of cold, lonely nights
And the anguish of being alone;
How adept I am at nursing  love's wounds,
Yet, I never learned to heal my own

More than once, rough winds have ****** me down,
And Time had to re-feather my wings;
I've been neglected, abandoned and lost,
So I tend to dwell upon these things

You'll not hear a cheerful melody
Streaming through the broken window panes,
There's no roaring fire blazing on the hearth,
Just smoldering embers of love's remains

Skies become gray, and clouds tend to burst
When they pass over my little space;
Perhaps this is why guests dare not linger . . .
Too daunting and dismal is my place.
Well, then be off with you, and quicken your pace!

Long ago  my pride was abandoned
And Love's beggary became my art,
Just a drop of Love - a brief romance --
Has amply sustained this starving heart

Amorous overtures still put a blush
Upon the face of this wilting rose --
Praise my beauty . . . write me a love poem . . .
Spring will be mine though winter's wind blows

With what eagerness I would devour
The love poems you might hastily scrawl!
My starving heart would forego the feast,
Finding comfort in the crumbs that fall

Though meager the trickle from Love's spring,
The parched heart gives thanks with solemn prayer;
And even pity, wearing Love's mask,
Would banish the demons of despair

What darkness enshrouds the lonely heart
Until Love illumes it with its flame,
Even the embers of a flawed love
Will lend their pale glow to this sad game

Though Fate often stoops to treacheries,
Pity me not for what might have been;
I find solace in Love's fantasies . . .
Tangled in the lovely webs they spin