he speaks my name as if it's a soft prayer
that would bring heaven down to earth


©L.F.

my tears come in different colors
weeping in teal, the same color as your eyes
crying in violet, the same color that lies under my own
sobbing in pink, the same color of the blemishes on my face
whimpering in gray, the same color as the stressed hairs on my head
wallowing in gold, the same color I swore her heart was.
none of which are primary.

©L.F.

like the sky was feeling sad after the sun left
so the moon sprinkled little white gems and sparkles from moondust
to make the darkness feel lighter

©L.F.

the isolation wasn't poison, but a drug
one that I tried to drown myself into
until my brain would save myself, breathing in more air
panting rapidly,
loving how it felt to be on the edge of letting go
for just a second, to be with the nothingness surrounding me
until the world resumed
my heartbeat became evident
and the unsatisfaction of reality reappeared

©L.F.

the tears were traitors,
I tried so hard not to cry
repeating the words mom always said,
"boys aren't worth your tears"
but slowly they fell from my heavy lids
one by one, mocking me
while they left their stains of exhaustion
with the streaks left on my cheek,
the tears were traitors


©L.F.

I found the pieces of me that were left
and carried them in the tired bags left underneath my eyes
wanting so badly to leave it all behind
and rest


©L.F.

I had to cut you off
not from my life
but from the way you use me,
as your drug
your medication
your therapist
your twelve-step program
because your process of healing,
has become your addiction


©L.F.