in twin centuries dead to perception, whereat then I may've kept her
beyond the matin' season of tokay geckos that spills into September
contingent on what 877 M.K. Ultra bosses'll allow me to remember
the swollen socialism of Venezuela's social integrity that swells my
largely free-flowin,' thrill-hammered, vasodilated, thrilling member

in the endless possibility of dream
we talk in the calmest of whispers
ever so close
I am burning within these shadows
brushing against her
echoed laughter
the smell of her hair
and the electricity of her skin
exceeds consciousness
the beauty of the dream is in it's clarity
of that which is born from the energy
of two

Its funny,
you calling me
“good girl.”

Hands running
down my thighs
and
your lips
leaving saliva,
sticky little white lies.

My back arched
and my eyes closed,
pretending.

I’m this
******
up
feminist.

But tell me,
what to do
when you assume
because we kiss
your hands
have any place
on MY body.

And tell me how,
you wish
for me
to be
your'
“good girl”
when you have yet
to ask
if it’s okay
that you are already
sticking your fingers
inside of me.

To myself I make a promise,
A vow to be all I can be;
To live up to my full promise,
To the true potential in me.

I stole a traffic cone last summer
it sits in my bedroom next to
a mason jar with 25 dollars
worth of change in it
more or less
and a hundred dollar bottle
of perfume

I own 8 vintage cameras
and only 3 of them work

I woke up yesterday at
12:45pm
and I ate 6 girl scout cookies
for breakfast

the windowsill next to my bed
holds a candle that I will probably
never burn
a book that I haven’t finished
a half empty box of condoms
and a roll of electrical tape
because all of my chargers are
broken

today I fried chicken in a pan
and I ate it with noodles
and canned alfredo sauce
and I felt accomplished

today my sister called me
to ask what she should wear
on a date where a man
cooks her dinner at his apartment
I told her to wear jeans a blouse
but I don’t know what
one wears in that situation
because I’ve never been
in that situation
and then I hung up and
watched 2 more hours of netflix
alone

tomorrow I will call my mother
while I walk back to my car
from poetry class
even though I don’t have any
news to tell her
and when I hang up I will wonder
if she notices that I call her
every Monday and Wednesday
around 10:30am

tomorrow at 3 o clock
my phone will remind me to
take my medicine
and I will take 75mg
of Effexor and I will
drink a full glass of water
because I am afraid of getting a pill
stuck in my esophagus

tomorrow night I will lay in bed
and I will have a brief anxiety attack
about getting older
and then I will fall asleep
and have scary dreams about more insignificant things

another seat empty

another missed assignment

another letter grade down on attendance

another excuse email

                             Dear __,
Sorry i'm not in class, i'm not feeling well can you tell me  what I missed? thank you have a great day!
                                            Thanks,     ___
another day i'm a waste

                                            
                                               but professor let me be honest,
                                                         sorry i can't come to class
                                                               i really can't handle anything
                                                        ­              anymore

She walked in the café
and asked for a red apple,
and I was sitting there,
falling in love,
with a green apple on my hand.

We eyed each other, as man and woman do,
and we laughed at each other’s apples
holding an ‘hello’ still to come.

My eyes are burning
And my *** needs some space
This kid is staring at me
He has a big grin on his face
For 6 hours he's been awake
Bouncing around on three seats
It almost seems like someone
Has given him **** to eat
I stuff myself with pills
To try to get some sleep
But the kid is keeping me up
So soon I'll make him weep
I will whisper in his ear
That santa isn't real
And I'll describe to him
How chicken-pox will make him feel
I'll tell him about the dentist
How bad it hurts to drill
And how much he'll have to work
To be able to pay his bills
How hard it is to get a girl
How expensive a driving lesson is
The statistics of failing marriages
And how you can get ****** from a kiss
I'll tell him all of this and more
If he doesn't sit down and shut up
And if he still won't calm down
I'll show him *******