They told me monsters lived under the bed
They told me that monsters are tangible
Now the only monsters I know live in my head
And they always leave me susceptible

To doubt
And fear.

If I tell you the monsters look like me
I know that you will think I'm going insane
Maybe if I keep telling myself I'm ok I'll believe
That normality is something I can maintain

But what is normal?

They told me monsters lived under the bed
They told me that monsters are tangible
The only monsters I know live in my head
Please, I beg you, don't be skeptical.

6am. Coffee. Shower. Car.
Looks at his watch for the millionth time
For once he is only 5 minutes late
Coffee. Lift. Desk. Papers
The laptop is on. The day starts.

She trips. She screams. Bullets...
She crawls into a house. No doors. Or windows.
She curls into a corner. Bloodstains everywhere-
The walls, the floor, her clothes-

Explosion.
The ground shakes.

Papers. Desk. Lift. Car
Looks at his watch for the millionth time
For once he is only 5 minutes late
Home. Shower. Cook. Dinner.
She looks stunning tonight. The evening starts.

Screeches. Groans. Crying. Tears.
They fill the atmosphere like smoke
Coming from the fire next door.

There's nowhere to run.

She hauls herself up. Limping
She watches as the flames close in.

It's way way past what bedtime should be
What time even is that?
The neighborhood is quiet
The occasional drunk walks by
His path illuminated by crystals in the sky

I close my eyes and count imaginary sheep
One, two, three, four...

I'm bored. I sigh. I roll onto my front.

I wish I could shut down my thoughts
As easily as turning my laptop off.

Five, six, seven, eight...
My eyelids are dropping...

I groan. I reach to my bedside table.
I turn the alarm off.

Why do I always fall asleep
When it's time to wake up?

Running through the wood
The girl is running
In hot pursuit is the enemy
The enemy behind her-
She darts to the left
Almost tripping
She needs to get away
Away from the enemy
Suddenly
She leaps forward
A river in front of her-
She plunges
Icy waters **** her in
She reaches the other side
Only just
Has she escaped,
Escaped the enemy?
Exhausted
She turns round,
Looking down into the water
She sees a reflection
Terrified
Drenched
She runs again
For she has seen once more
The enemy.

Why did I let this happen?

My beating heart started pounding
Electricity sparked through every vein
A fire started in my brain
Till my system was overriding

Everyday I needed you to leave
My pounding heart wanted you to remain
With no sense left I became insane
Arteries exploded and you let me bleed

And for what?

I remember laying there almost dead
Mom's words entered my conscious thoughts
About how you were seriously flawed
Though I tried hard to forget it

But guess what?

I still want you back.

She walks familiar streets with her head to the floor
a single crystal falls from her eye
and races down her cheek
she passes the church full of memories of her past
memories as grey and broken as the gravestones

she walks familiar streets with her head to the floor
walking through the city centre
crowds rush towards the same meaningless purpose
to them everyday is the same-
but to her her heart is as complete as the smashed shop window

she walks familiar streets with her head to the floor
the garnet high up above her shines
illuminating the aquamarine sky
but to her the world slowly fades-
it turns from colour to sepia to grey.

The sand underneath his feet is warm-
the sun shines in an empty sky
with the sea, as blue as the playdough
he had as a child

The sea, now resting was once furious-
the wind tormented it for hours
hours that he would always remember
when the wind laughed in his ears
and possessed the boat

As he looks at the sea tears rain from his eyes
the memory of seeing others like him
grabbed by the wind
tossed, shoved, pulled, pushed, before being thrown
and swallowed by the raging sea

now he stands on the shore on the beach
the view is similar to home- but not quite
he stands in a foreign land, with nothing
except his shoes and rags for clothes-
and he holds a baby, but not his.