The Champions - Hello Poetry

Dec 2014

its not julia

please stop romancing cutting,
depression, eating disorders,
anxiety and suicidal thoughts.
those things are not beautiful.

it is not beautiful waking up
every morning wishing you
weren't here.

it is not beautiful having to wear
long sleeves in the summer to
cover up the scars on your arms.

it is not beautiful throwing up
in the toilet just so you don't
gain another pound.

it is not beautiful missing school
for a month just because you
couldn't drag yourself out of bed
to see daylight.

but you can be beautiful with
cuts and scars all over your body.

and you can be beautiful even though
you aren't too happy about your weight.

oh, and you're still beautiful if you haven't
socialized with people for a couple weeks.

and you're still beautiful even though you
blew out your 16th birthday candles wishing
you were dead.

you're beautiful, but the things that you have done to
your body aren't.

#love #cutting #sad #depression #lonely #eating #depressed #suicidal #disorders #anorexic

Dec 2014

Bluebird

shapeless

Don't try to shape me with your mind,
because yesterday i was a bird.
Don't try to shape me with your mind,
i don't want to be you.
Don't try to shape me with your mind,
today i want to be shapeless,
And If you don't try to shape me with your mind,
tommorrow i'll be something new.

#life #mind #form #shape

Dec 2014

Adrianna Aarons

Breathe

She seemed so distantly broken.
Haunted shadows lurk in dark corners,
waiting for the slight curve of her smile,
the first sign of happiness,
to attack.
Crashing her world down around her,
I offer my hand to pull her out
of the familiar rubble,
scooping her up in my arms,
searching for safe ground
where the suicide bombers of depression
won’t be able to touch her.
Fear raged through her body
like fever and overdose.
Worlds spinning circles,
colors blurring
and behind
hazy eyes
shallow breaths.
Sticking graves into the tortured hollows
of the chambers of the heart.
She is limb against my body
and I know that standing will not
be easy,
but I am strong enough for you
to lean on.
The backbone that will keep you upright,
for I am one of the few
parts of yourself that you love,
and I have never needed you more.
A screaming ambulance arrives
and paramedics flushing
your veins full of
IV bags with hope.
Clearing the poison of your system left behind
by the touch of demons
who have been haunting you for five years.
But I have known you my entire life.
Small girl, curly hair,
chipped nail polish,
black eye makeup.
I can instantly recognize you
as myself.
Brought together by chance,
in a classroom used as a safety base
for life’s game of tag that kept hitting us.
About ready to quit,
we were offered the chance
to love ourselves and eachother.
And through that discovery, this game
became so much easier to play
once we can double team it.
Quickly developed a love
you do not find in romantic relationships.
A comfort that lies solely in the unbreakable
bond of twins.
Spilled secrets
over steaming mugs
of raspberry tea.
Late night talks and comfort food binges.
We no longer had to speak.
We told stories with our eyes,
and painted murals with mascara tracks,
and crimson tears washed down the drains
from our thighs.
Our weakest moments hitting carefully.
No shorts.
No skirts.
No dresses.
The truth kept behind stained bandages
tucked away in bottom drawers
quietly stuffing our ***** secrets into our laundry.
Red lipstick hearts
on mirrors and
X’s on the backs of our hands,
marking us discounted;
damaged goods.
Returned over
and over again
until insecurity was definite and hope
was a far off dream so
we stretched our clipped wings,
no longer able to fly so we
simply had to learn how to break
the falls.
So we tightened the screws on pencil sharpeners
so the blade couldn’t be extracted in a moment of
weakness,
then poured our heart and souls
into glasses and toasted to our futures.
I want to wrap you in laughter
and sing to you the soundtrack of
the best memories that we had.
You deserve this happiness
and tonight
you are alive
and you are beautiful
even if you don’t want to be.
So take my hand
and close your eyes.
Just listen.
I love you,
just breathe.

#suicide #sad #depression #anxiety #help #conscience #recovery #overdose #hospital #encouragement

Dec 2014

Gaby Comprés

maybe i just needed it to rain.

i didn’t want rain.
i wanted beauty.
i wanted to see the rising sun
touch the blooming flowers
and i wanted to fall in love
with the glow of the sunset.
but it rained.
maybe i needed the rain,
because i needed to remember
that rain makes
the blooming flowers grow
and rain brings rainbows
and it washes away the
ugliness and brings back beauty.
and maybe i needed the rain
to remind me that i won’t always
be broken, that the brokenness
will be made whole, that this
season one day will be a dim memory,
that You will wipe away my tears,
that You make it rain on my heart
so that flowers can bloom in it,
so rainbows can fill the
skies of my soul.
maybe i just needed it to rain.

Dec 2014

Willow-Anne

Loneliness

I'm surrounded by a sea of people
As far as the eye can see
All flowing in the same direction
And just floating along, is me

I've been wading in this water
Letting it carry me any way
Not caring about which direction
And never having any say

After wading all this time though
My legs started growing tired
So finally it was time to choose
Which direction I desired

But the problem with floating along
Was that I never became aware
I wasn't really a part of the waves
I was just sort of...there

What I wanted didn't matter
The waves still moved as one
Whether I moved with or against them
Didn't matter in the long run

Then I thought I better get out
And give myself some time to think
But I couldn't see the shore anymore
And with that, I started to sink

Now I'm surrounded by a sea of people
As far as the eye can see
All still flowing in the same direction
But drowning in it, is me

"I used to think the worst thing in life was to end up all alone. It's not. The worst thing in life is to end up with people that make you feel all alone." Robin Williams <3
Wow, I am so honored that this was chosen for daily poem and that I have received so many friendly comments.
Thank you all for your friendly words and messages, and for your love and support. You have no idea how much it means to me. <3

Nov 2014

Chloe

Pain Isn't Beautiful

I can't turn my sadness into beauty.
I try and try and try but the truth is,
there's a certain kind of darkness
and a certain kind of evil
that can't be romanticized into a poem.
Not all feelings can be explained by vomiting up random words into a
college ruled note book paper.
We use words to make our suicidal thoughts sound normal.
Sound acceptable. Sound beautiful.
But suicide is none of those things.
So stop putting the idea of suicidal solutions into the minds of 13 year old boys and girls.
We constantly tell kids that suicide is not the answer,  yet we make the idea seem so appealing.
We paint a pretty picture of
slit wrists
coke lines
anti depressants
hospital beds
and grave stones.
But they are not works of art.
They are grey and cold and empty.
So stop using shades of red, yellow and pink, stop describing the warmth of pain, the way drugs and sliced skin fills your emptiness.
Tell it how it really is.
Instead of writing how good each cut feels, try writing about how bad it actually hurts. how its an addiction.
Instead of writing about the freedom you feel while high, try writing about the way you feel when you come down.  The way the pain crawls right back up your throat,  the way drugs actually ****** up your entire life.
Instead of writing about your sweet dreams of death,  the beautiful idea of taking your own life,
Try writing about the fact that you are terrified to die.  That you want so badly to live. That you don't want to give up.
Stop making the hurt you feel sound cool and trendy.
Tell the world what it's truly like
because lately people have sewn the words
"Beauty" and "pain" into a cute little pink sweater in white lace.

This isn't a poem. This is a rant.

#suicide #poem #cutting #self #harm #pain #not #up #*** #grow

Nov 2014

Chloe

Please Try To Understand

My wrists still burn from 7th grade
when the entire school laughed at me
for having *** with my brother.
But they didn't know how ******* sick it really was
and they didn't know I didn't want it.
So I ran out of class and sat on the bathroom floor,
carving my skin with my favorite earrings
that started off silver but slowly turned red.
I told you I don't wear earrings anymore.

My throat still hurts from the time I tried to drink drain cleaner
but it was so bitter i spit it all out and it ran down my chin.
So I slept all day and all night
because I cried so hard I couldn't keep my eyes open.
I wonder if that's what you taste on my lips,
Salty tears and bitter chemicals.
Is that why we never kiss?

My neck is still bruised from when I was 11 years old
and hung a jump rope from the ceiling in my basement
and tied it in a knot around my neck.
But soon as I jumped off the chair I ******* fell to the floor
with nothing but a rope burn beneath my chin.
It wasn't the feeling I wanted and I cried so long and violently,
I thought my head would explode.
Does it make sense that I don’t like heights?
Maybe that's why I'm afraid of bridges.

My lungs are still full of water from 2011
when I tried to drown myself in the bathtub.
But the water wasn't very deep and it was hard to stay under.
I could feel myself getting dizzy as my head popped back to surface.
So I stood up,
shampoo still in my hair,
and I washed everything down the drain besides my self.
When I told you I don't know how to swim,
I actually meant I'm too afraid to learn.

My ******* still hurt from the boy who thought getting me drunk would make me take my clothes off.
And I hate to say it but it ******* worked.
But what he didn't realize is that at 15 years old,
I would have gotten naked for him anyways.
I would have touched him even if
I wasn't influenced to pour
shots down my throat and coke up my nose.
I didn't have a chance to say yes or no.
I just wanted to have fun and try to forget everything I was wanting
to **** myself for.
But I ended up with a heartless human being on top of me calling me a *****
while I lie motionless about to *****.
When I got home,
my chest was black and blue but I didn't cry this time
because by then I was too ******* numb to care about anything.
I told you I don't like to drink.
I told you my body aches.

My hands are still sore from when I got sent to rehab and met a boy who liked it when I touched him.
He only came out of his room when the nurses helped him walk.
His face was so white you could almost see through him and he only spoke when he wanted to feel me.
Every night at dinner I would put my hands down his pants underneath the table,
until he stopped eating dinner with us.
He was addicted to something bad and he just kind of stopped waking up.
I got sent home but I don't think he ever left.
I waited months for that boy to call.
But he never did.
Every one disappeared
*And now I'm doing the same to you.

Nov 2014

Andrew Durst

When you love someone.

And when you
            love someone;

their name
begins
to sound like
a song that
never leaves
       your
            head.

-Andrew Durst.

Nov 2014

Fish The Pig

Skip To The Good Part

Take me to the city, boy.
Take my hand and drag me along
with nothing but the clothes on my back-
I'm sure we'll be okay.

Take me away to where the lights are pretty
and the noise muffles our voices
and we can swim with the crowds.

Take me where anything is possible,
to where the money and fame
and stress and hectic are.

Take me away to the city, boy.
Take me away from the small town
too far from anything.

Take me from the normal,
from reality.

Take me to the city,
where we can be who we want
and they can't tell us no.

Take me to the city, boy.
we won't have to sleep
and we can keep smiling
and loving
and dreaming
so long as the lights stay on.

Take me to the city, boy.
it's all I've ever wanted.

Aug 2014

AD Sifford

Posion-seed

Doubt is the most poisonous of all seeds
It has the power to destroy everything you have ever known
And I am in the midst of it

God, please help me
Lead me to the doors of your salvation--
Up the steps of your mercy,
Into the Abode of your love,
That I might abide there within it

Call me by the name of your Child
and let that title never be revoked
Never again
If it ever was, or ever has been

Let me live securely in you forever
All the days of my life
Forever, then forever more

Wrapped by your presence,
Held by your grace,
And standing on the truth of your Word,
The Lamb,
Jesus, and in his Name Alone,
Yours, God,
I pray Amen, Amen, and Amen

All power, and glory,
and honor, and praise,
Forever and ever,
Then forever more
To my Savior, my King, and my God

|Written & posted August 26th, 2014|

Normally I go in order of date written, but this little bonus poem is one I posted on the day I wrote it. The usual chronological order picks up again right after this one.

© 2017 A.D. Sifford.
I'm okay with you sharing my poems, but I ask that you show courtesy. Please be honest about the authorship by attributing it to my name. Thank you,
- Sifford

#love #doubt #god #faith #christian #spirituality #jesus #christianity #devotion #christ

Aug 2014

Jessy Ivan Diaz

Untitled

Our love was poetic, the type that you find writers writing about in their journals. Trying to find ways to compare the burning sensation our hearts feel when our bodies touch.
Does it look similar to the way a star dies- colours imploding and spraying a pitch black emptiness with a spectrum of colours so surreal it seems as if the universe took acid.

Would they start to write about how it’s so destructive that it reminds them of the California wildfires that engulf acres in minutes.

Our love, it reminded them of the way the ocean felt- vast and mysterious. They wrote about the way the moon would pull against the ocean and the way the ocean pushed back, telling the world about how I would hold you close against my body and you would push away, our bodies like the waves.

We were beautiful.

Stars melted at the sight of our kisses, creating supernovas that would make the unknown elements that sit at the bottom of our bellies like undiscovered essentials that make us whole.
Broken pieces that came together better than puzzle pieces.
Our love was endless.

So why did you go?

#love #sad #passion #relationship #us #upset #spilledthoughts