Help me.
I am failing.
I am being torn.
I am hiding so much behind smiles.
I am hurt.
But hiding this hurt with a smile.
Stress is tearing me down.
I'm fine right?
I should be.
Whats wrong for me to be so depressed?
But then i figured out.
Its so much stress.
I have to be perfect.
Or I get my dreams crushed.
I hate this.
I am not perfect.
So why do certain people try to make me this perfect college material thing.
I will be the first in my entire history of family to be successful.
I will be the first to not be a failure.
My mother told me when i was 11 years old of age i'd never be a musician.
She told me i'd be terrible.
She told me i'd fail.
4 years later.
I proved her wrong.
Ive become the one thing she said i'd never become.
I became to be the most successful out of everyone in my family.
I am the one now with the name thats recognizable.
I have simply proven every person wrong.
That have told me i cant do anything.
Now they say i wont ever be happy again.
I'll simply prove you wrong once again.
Just watch me.

Once you lose someone.
To death or heartbreak.
You remember everything every single night.
Do your thoughts sometimes come to the end of wondering.
Wondering why.
Having the questions of what did i do to deserve this.
Thinking of the times you had.
The things they helped you in ways you didn't know you were lost in direction with.
The things you had when they were there.
The things you gained from their presence.
The fears the fought away.
Then they leave.
They end up to become gone.
But in your heart,
your mind, your soul.
You heart gained back the heartbreak,
The pain you had but it got worse.
Your mind became haunted cause their still there you can get rid of them.
They have all of you.
Your soul it became broken,
Your fears came back.
They are killing you inside.
Your lost again.
Your twisted.
You dont know where to look where to go.
Their presence wont leave you alone.
And you cry.
You scream for them back.
Your fears come to take you back.
And you have no one to fight them away.
And hold you while you cry.
How lost are you now?
How much do you heart inside?
Whos that person that is killing you inside from being gone?

Josiah Jack
never uttered a sound
when they dragged him away
from the scene.
when his poor body
was eventually found,
the treatment endured,
had been mean.

With no tongue in his head
they had left him for dead.

With a month
on his back,
he did indeed
contemplate.
Only sin
“he was black”
hence forth
this weary state.

They attacked in the night,
hooded and white.

All in all
he was
lucky
to be
breathing at all,
all because
he was plucky,
all because
he stood tall.

A ***** they said
should lower his head.

Were they hooded
for fear?
Were they hooded
in shame?
Most likely,
once covered,
they could hide
of their name.

If things were so right,
why hide out of sight?

Bravery isn't
a word for the ****,
Cowards,
this word comes to mind.
Bravery comes
when there's only one man,
not one
with ten more stood behind.

I will strike in a pack
with someone watching my back.

Their plan
was to ****,
this man
Josiah Jack.
Perhaps they
get a thrill
when someone
cannot fight back.

They get real loud
when they join with the crowd.

Josiah
knew well
that if he
raised a hand
his kin folk
would feel hell
from this
unruly band.

So he did not fight
but gave in to his plight.

They think
they were hidden
beneath that
white hood,
Josiah's hearing
is sound
and his
memory is good.

So when things are forgot,
he will take of his lot.

That's exactly
what happened,
as they lay
in their bed.
The flames hurled
with fury
the sky
filled with red.

This man barbequed them like fish on a rack
and no one put it down to Josiah Jack.

When hope is lost
And the map is torn,
When you bear the cross
And are crowned with thorns,
When the love has gone
And the tears dried out,
When your steadfast faith
Has been turned to doubt,
When your joy is done
And you smile no more,
When you long for the sun
But the rain does pour,
Know that I walk with you,
You will come to no harm.
And should you get too weary,
I will carry you in my arms

Love-It is confusing at times.
It hurts you.
Love is perfect yet heartbreaking.
Some of us search for a person to love in order not to feel alone.
It makes you smile.
It makes you cry.
It makes us strong.
It makes us weak.
Love is the feeling when your laying in bed and there's one person you can not get off your mind.
Love is waking up and instantly smiling thinking of that one person.
Love is what makes reality better than any dream you could ever have then.
When on the brink of sadness.
Love heals and makes you smile mindlessly.
A persons simple words can make every single thing fade away and only those words stay with you.
Love is the mindless smiling.
Love makes you feel butterflies.
Or makes you nervous.
Love can make you cry.
Love can make you sad.
But also you come to know when love is true when, You can go threw everything with everyone hating you at times,
but then theres one person you can run to that you can hug.
Love is complicated.
Cause you fall in love many times til you know there's one person you couldn't go a day without.
Til you break with that person and you both come to know you are meant to be forever.
Or
The strong feeling of connection that you just know, Its meant to be.
Love is love.
No matter the person.
If you love them, then simply create a fairy tale others wish they had.
-Mickie Rouxe-

People they come to be judgmental towards others.
The say words that demolish others.
The crush people.
A simple word, can **** someone.
People say.
Words are just words they dont affect you.
But words are why wars are started.
Words are why someone killed them self today.
Words are always there.
People say actions speak louder than words but what happens when you cant move?
Words are all you have.
Words are all you have left.
Words are not just simple words.
Words are the most strongest power we all hold.
A word can change someones life forever.
You can save someones life by words.
How likely can you by actions?
What if your to far to do something.
Words is all you have.
How did the power of words become so small but actions now rule to be more powerful than words that change the world.
You can not change a world by actions.
But you most definitely can by words.
Inspiration starts with words and builds to more.
Words.
They can haunt you if you let them.
If you keep unsaid words inside you'll come to know those words you never said are the one things you needed to be said.
Words are what heals you.
Words are what kills you.
So how can a word be so worthless?
If it can **** people inside and then out.
But a word can also heal a persons entirety.
Words save people, But words also ****.
-Mickie Rouxe-

a cold starry eve
homeless huddled in doorways
some will die this night

I speak of feelings
In a code called lies
But here's the thing:

**I'm kind of hoping someone will decipher it

mountain clouds surround
ancient stone walls rough
and smooth
secrets deep within


Copyright © 2014 Christi Michaels.
All Rights Reserved.

☪*  *Celestial     dream    catchers   ☪
∈    won't tear     the stars     asunder tonight.    ∋
◖◗   But they   make no   such exceptions,    ◖◗
⚮   for poets.   **⚮