Life goes on, scars fade
They can't hurt me now
They're out of my reach
And that's worse, somehow

all i see ahead
is shattered glass
dense gray fog
ice cold stares
scars upon scars
colorless sights
empty sidewalks
forever and always

Scream and shout, kick the ground, fall apart crying
I hate the world, it isn't fair, hold my heart from breaking
My life stretches way too far into a fog I can't see through
No one's fault you don't understand but you don't have a clue
Stop thinking stop thinking my mind keeps on racing
Not words it's all emotions like I just can't stop feeling
Endless accusations left unformed drive me insane
I'll be alright but this moment now all I think about is pain

I tear myself apart
Only to have to pick up the pieces
Wipe off the blood
Then flatten out creases
Straighten up, smile, who noticed anyway
Hope it's enough to last another few days

When I was a kid I thought I fell in love
Worshiped the ground he walked on and the sky above
Giving everything I had was all I'd ever known
He was supposed to be my heart and my home
I'm not much older now but I often remember
The child that I had been; God how I hate her
I can't hurt anyone but I can inflict the pain on myself
And I guess I do that too often to be good for my health
The question that always comes up for me is "why"
The search for an answer continues as the years go by
I wish I could reach across time and destroy your life
Instead I sit here and watch red run down the knife

I like to play diplomat; it's hard to say no
Never the one who decides where we go
Affixed in place by the roots in the past
I hide behind everyone and choose to be last
So I also play victim more than I care to admit
Enough is enough, I've decided, that's it
I've wasted too much time on worry and fear
I think it's time to show the world that I'm here

Sitting here talking about myself
It all feels almost, well, silly
Like why would this person care?
I'm just talking about me
Sure these things happened
And maybe I feel odd once in a while
I never really thought it mattered
Just hid it all behind a smile
There are lots of people like me
(Or I guess; that's what I've heard)
I've always just wanted to be average
Disguise wrong feelings in written word
Even years after I still ask the question:
How much of it all is in my head?
I think I need this help, and it's working
Though it's so terrifying, I hide in bed

Bound securely, affixed professionally
I admit the bandages feel really nice
But they're in response to waking the past
I'm not sure I'm willing to pay this price
When I hesitate, I say I want to get better
Who doesn't want their broken leg to mend?
Somehow being honest is physically painful
I almost prefer when I had to pretend