Don’t know how it started,
or if it’ll ever end,
some call it Samsara,
others call it trends,

watched a video on YouTube,
Mac Miller in bed with Ariana Grande,
Mac died last week from an OD/suicide,
after Ariana got engaged to another man,

then I Googled this,
“**** photos of Ariana Grande”,
what’s the matter with me why does everything lead,
to having my thing in my hand,

swear to God YouTube is the Devil,
got me to watch screens,
used to have more freedom,
because I didn’t own a TV,

but laptops just made it all too easy,
now I barely go out,
and when I do it’s usually just for food,
then it’s back to my bed or my couch,

laid up like I’m ill,
typing on my MacBook like an addict,
I mean how do you think I wrote this poem,
I wrote it by typing on my MacBook like an addict,

and I don’t know how it started,
or if it’ll ever end,
some call it Samsara,
others call it trends…

∆ LaLux ∆

These body’s are just our flesh suits,
so don’t let the stress get you,
your body doesn’t have a soul,
your soul has a body & it’s only a rental,

& sure sometimes we go through hard times,
but those can all be written off as incidentals,

so don’t worry,
& don’t stress too much,
nothing is really a big deal,
so just chill & find someone to share love with,

love this,
is really the only thing worth anything,
this is all temporary material allures are all illusions,
have some perspective no one is perfect & everything is only energy,

& energy can not be taken away nor replaced,
it simply transforms to different forms & takes on different shapes,
so rest assured if your love is pure we will see each other again,
in a different time in a different body in a different place,

hey,

these body’s are just our flesh suits,
so don’t let the stress get you,
your body doesn’t have a soul,
your soul has a body & it’s only a rental,

& sure sometimes we go through hard times,
but those can all be written off as incidentals,

so don’t worry,
& don’t stress too much,
nothing is really a big deal,
so just chill & find someone to share love with…

∆ Aaron LaLux ∆

"Can we make love,
at least a couple more times,
before we never see each other again?”,

Her voice is soft,
sweet,
almost innocent,
and adds an aphro-ambiance,
to the incessant crash of the ocean waves in the background,

her pleading eyes,
intercept my retreating lies,
it can be so hard to argue with the truth.

I am all out of excuses,
as we lay naked as the day we were born,
in this bed at this beachside bungalow in Baja,
clouds gathering outside for the coming post sunshine storm,

two tainted souls,
in a rare moment of purity,
as we lay there I can not lie here,
I can not tell her I will see her again,
I can not tell her everything will be okay,
I can not tell her I love her,
at least not in the same way,
as she loves me,
which of course is unconditionally,

we’ve just made love,
and as she’s mentioned,
possibly for the last time,
and though she wants to make love again and again,
until we both grow old,
wants and realities can compete in this existence,
and in this moment is where they both meet,

“Can we make love,
at least a couple more times,
before we never see each other again?”,

she asks me again,
shaking me from the depths of my thoughts,
she pulls my submarine from the dark depths,
and shakes me out to dry in the sunlight of her attention,
her question,
comes with a hint of offense,
honestly no offense was meant,
at least not from me,
it’s not that I was ignoring her in that moment,
at least not completely,

it’s just that it’s difficult for me to stay in the moment,
when the past keeps dragging me back,
and the future keeps pushing me forward,
and there’s a needy media monster that doesn’t want to be ignored,

where were,
we,
where have we gone,
and what has become,
of the innocence in which we were born?

We lay,
naked as the day we were born,
in this bed at this beachside bungalow in Baja,
clouds gathering outside for the coming post sunshine storm,

nothing covering our skin,
except a thin layer of post *** perspiration,
for even though the sun has already set,
the humid heat still sits there,
like the soon to be cloud covered moon,
that hangs lazily in the sky,
seeming neither amused nor moved by our human drama.

Her question,
is reasonable enough,
and she is,
beautiful enough,
so why,
when she asks,
“Can we make love,
at least a couple more times,
before we never see each other again?”,
can I not say yes?

Well,
for one,
I respect her too much to lie to her,
plus lying to such an honest question,
would seem so taboo,

reason number two,

they say,
we do not choose love,
they say,
love chooses us,
and I do not love her,
even though I may want to,
I do not love her,
because she is not the one Love had decided to choose,

I do not love her,
as amazing as she is,
even if I should love her,
for she is everything a mortal man could ask for,
she is,
a gorgeous and successful model,
with a sharp and receptive mind,
a big heart,
and maybe most importantly,
an undying devotional love for me,
so logically,
I should love her,

but love is not logical,
love is as passionate and irrational,
as the weather here in Baja,
one moment shining bright with clear skies,
the next moment dark and ominous with gathering clouds,

so when she asks me,
“Can we make love,
at least a couple more times,
before we never see each other again?”,

I simply say nothing,
for what can I say,
how can I explain the irrational,
how can I say the one word,
that will break her heart open,
then watch that heart break right in front of me,
how can I say “No”,
to the one question,
that the girl that has said “Yes”,
to my every question,
asks me?

So I say nothing,
I simply open this writing book,
as these skies open above us,
and write down these thoughts upon these pages,
as the desert rains fall down upon us,

I write this poem,
as we lay naked as the day we were born,
in this bed at this beachside bungalow in Baja,
as the incessant crash of the ocean waves in the background,
adds to the aphro-ambiance,
of this bittersweet moment in time,
so that even when I am gone,
and she is gone,
and we are gone,
these words,
from these thoughts,
will live forever,
immortalized in this verse,
forever resting,
somewhere in the collective psyche,
of our unified broken hearts,

as we lay there,
as we mutually mourn,
all that has been loved,
and all that has been lost,
in this impermanent moment called Life,

and she asks,
"Can we make love,
at least a couple more times,
before we never see each other again?”,

∆ Aaron LaLux ∆

Backstage Drake show,
don’t know how I got here,
heart beats *******,
feel every feeling except fear,

at Drake’s last show,
of The Boy Meets World Tour,
backstage without a backstage pass,
how the heck did I get here?

Life so blessed,
there’s no need for a backstage pass,
always All Access,
no matter where on this atlas,

facts facts facts,

everybody misbehaving,
no one knows how to act,
on our worst behavior,
wish we could bring **** Back,

actually,
can barely believe we exist,
and all of the quotes I wrote,
are starting to sound like a To Do List,

my God what type of life is this,

in first place,
which wasn’t supposed to happen in the first place,
how the Hell did I end up,
backstage at a show hosted by Drake,

how’d I get picked for first place VIP,
when I wasn’t even close to being a First Round Draft Pick,
how can I live a life so viciously victorious,
at the same time terribly tragic,

I don’t know,
just know it all happened like magic,
like that’s it,
like going from being an anonymous to an A-List actress,

beats bumping heart pumping,
sold my heart but kept my soul intact,
and if want a seat at the table,
all you have to do is ask,

go ahead,
let’s make this a conversation
but if you run your mouth too long,
I might start running out of patience,

and then you’ll lose your chance and your placement,
just saying,

just finished another world tour,
Boy Meets World 2017,
on this wild ride like a rodeo with OVO,
only one word to describe this and that’s “Amazing.”,

backstage Drake show,
don’t know how I got here,
heart beats *******,
feel everything except fear,

at Drake’s last show,
of The Boy Meets World Tour,
backstage without a backstage pass,
how the heck did I get here?…

∆ Aaron LaLux ∆

new book HERE: www.amazon.com/dp/1721134158
Or message me directly and I'll send it to you for FREE.
∆

Dang,
it feels like you all want me to lose,
I thought you’d be relieved,
to know that I emerged victorious from the abuse,

it’s as if just surviving wasn’t enough,
but I also have to be humbled even more,
is having guns in your face and being beaten to a pulp,
not enough I need to be humiliated some more,

but that’s okay,

because sticks and stones may break my bones,
but words will never hurt me,
and I’ve been through a lot worse than some words,
so your opinions written in literary form will never hurt me,

don’t confuse my confidence with cockiness,
because if you do then it’s you that’s confused,
I should be celebrated not player hated,
it wasn’t easy and still isn’t easy getting through the abuse,

but many claim it’s ego,
like I should stay depressed just because I’ve been depressed,
as if I should lay over and give up,
as if I should curse everything for which I’ve been blessed,

what is it that disgusts you so much about success?

You don’t know what I’ve been through,
don’t confuse my being resilient as me being a Narcissist,
honestly I am more humble than you might think,
plus I know any moment I could go off into eternity,

nothing is permanent,
especially not the moment we are in currently,

so please stop throwing stones at my head,
because of some pre-conceived notions you red,
of some words that I said,
that were the result of some cuts that were bled,

I mean seriously what do you want me to do,
would you rather I just die in defeat than live in my truth,
would you rather I allow myself to be pushed of the edge,
than find a way to persevere and pull though?

See I’m as depressed as you I hurt too,
but the difference is I don’t want you to lose,
I want you to be victorious and write yourself into the light,
because Love over Hate is what I every time choose to choose,

Dang,
it feels like you all want me to lose,
I thought you’d be relieved,
to know that I emerged victorious from the abuse…

∆ LaLux ∆

All the money in the world can’t buy love,
if all you receive are material things,
then really what was any of it worth,

I mean what would you pay,
to just have peace of mind for a day,
it seems peace of mind is worth more than any piece of artwork,

just ask John Paul Getty,
or better yet ask John Paul Getty The 3rd,
lost his ear over a few million dollars,
They say “You can’t buy love.” haven’t you heard?

In other words,

a Monet may be worth millions,
but a family is priceless,
I’d suggest not haggling with the well being of those you love,
because when you pay less you don’t know what you’ll really get,

and you get what you pay for,
and love is free so why pay more,
see it seems no matter how many lessons you learn,
there is always more in store,

on the shores,
of Malibu California,
eating grapes & crepes at The Getty Estate,
which was made to replicate The home of The Emperor Adrian from Roma,

built in the spitting image,
John thought he was a reincarnation of Adrian,
see our bodies are worthless but our soul’s are timeless,
now I’ve got so lost in thought that I forgot where we were again,

oh yes I remember now,
like an old man remembering what really matters,
having his moment of truth while taking his last breath by a fire,
with a priceless masterpiece resting in his clutches,

what matters is love,
what matters is the energy of integrity,
because without integrity no matter how much money,
all we’ll leave behind is an empty legacy,

see,

all the money in the world can’t buy love,
if all you receive are material things,
then really what was any of it worth,

I mean what would you pay,
to just have peace of mind for a day,
it seems peace of mind is worth more than any piece of artwork…

∆ Aaron LaLux ∆

Connect like comets,
got thoughts but won’t comment,
controversial as a result of being honest,
honestly sick of the politics & sick of the nonsense,
actually I’m sick of it all to be honest but still I won’t *****,
conflicted by the conflicts that’re inflicted on my conscience,
from the constant onslaught of plots that they’ve got that I’m barraged with,
in this enormous orbit that we’re all in it’s ugly & gorgeous I’m nauseous but conscious,

just wishing they’d stop it & I’ve lost my train of thought but haven’t yet lost consciousness,

at,

a house party in The Hamptons,
July 6th. 2018,
last week D.C.,
next week Miami,

bless the vibes like we bless the mics,
that’s why they want us around,
if I get the invite & have the time I might take that flight,
because I’ve been all around but still up to get gown,

buzzing off of a mixture of different chemicals,
feeling Sharon ****** operating off of basic instinct,
Semi-Quasi-Serious-Centennial-American-Millennials,
wer­e are what is in so we tell them to get out with their doubts & we dismiss what they think,

live big & still get enough to give more than a little bit away to various charities,

with 3rd Eye Vision that’s 20/20 so they can’t pull a fast one on me,
in the perfect position I see everything while most of them can barely see anything,
not kidding but we do play no kids no way,
our artistic creations are what we will leave behind as our living legacies,

staying grounded at the same time we’re all stars outta this world like a fabulous galaxy,

where we connect like comets,
got thoughts but won’t comment,
controversial as a result of being honest,
honestly sick of the politics & sick of the nonsense,
actually I’m sick of it all to be honest but still I won’t *****,
conflicted by the conflicts that’re inflicted on my conscience,
from the constant onslaught of plots that they’ve got that I’m barraged with,
in this enormous orbit that we’re all in it’s ugly & gorgeous I’m nauseous but conscious,

just wishing they’d stop it & I’ve lost my train of thought but haven’t yet lost consciousness…

∆ Aaron LaLux ∆