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Mar 2021 · 152
Joy
SiouxF Mar 2021
Joy
Seek joy in all things,
The absurd,
The whimsical,
The sublime,
The pain,
The happiness,
The ups,
The downs,
The lessons,
The rewards,
For joy is in everything,
But found only
By those who seek
Mar 2021 · 473
Lost?
SiouxF Mar 2021
Sudden shocking realisation
Of what may be lost for evermore
Wakens you
From this deep slumber
Of melancholy and petulance
To appreciation of every **** thing
From the absurd to the whimsical to the sublime
Feb 2021 · 170
Broken
SiouxF Feb 2021
Once something is broken
It can never be the same again
Feb 2021 · 287
Words IV
SiouxF Feb 2021
Words said in anger
Can sting and hurt
But words said in the cold light of day
Wound deep
And can never be forgotten
Feb 2021 · 139
Forgiven?
SiouxF Feb 2021
Forgiven
But Not Forgotten
Can be a hard one to swallow
Whether you’re the giver
Or the receiver
Feb 2021 · 169
Words III
SiouxF Feb 2021
Words once spoken
No matter be whispered
Can never be returned
For they fester in the ether like a bad smell
Even when tumbled out
And never meant
They wound and scar
So don’t waste time with misspent words
Listen first
Pause before expressing
Speak with intent
Feb 2021 · 111
Fly
SiouxF Feb 2021
Fly
Look up
Rise up
Spread your wings
And fly once again
To the heights you are destined
So you can light the way
And inspire those who come after you
And show there is life
After the abyss
Feb 2021 · 127
Soar
SiouxF Feb 2021
I am humbled by your presence Lord,
Thank you
For revealing yourself to me
And showing me,
Even in times of pain and adversity
That encapsulated my life,
On reflection
You were always there
Always protecting
Always looking after me
Just waiting
Till I was ready to acknowledge You in my life,
And realise I have the strength
To rise above these demons and devilish thoughts
Wanting to drag me back into the abyss
To my comfort zone of familiarity,
But no place for me anymore,
I now choose to release myself from these shackles
And bird cage of a prison
For the door is open
And I now choose to soar
And rejoice in the glory that comes
From accepting You in my life
Feb 2021 · 107
Slow Down
SiouxF Feb 2021
Slow down for God’s sake,
Your mind,
Your thoughts,
Your actions,
Notice that around you,
Hear the birds sing,
Smell the roses by the roadside,
Pick up on clues and contrails,
Listen and learn,
Hear first, speak second,
We have two ears and one mouth for a reason,
Do this now,
Before it’s too late
Feb 2021 · 616
The Hug
SiouxF Feb 2021
Defences dissolving
Worries subsiding
Edges softening
Skin tingling
Heart warming,
As I melt in your arms feeling
Your warm embrace
Your tender touch
Your strength, power and care
Seeping into my bones
Instilling me with love
Restoring anew.

Oh the power of suggestion
The strength of our connection
As your hug reaches out and touches me
Across the snow filled miles
Feb 2021 · 245
Battle Won Scars
SiouxF Feb 2021
Life long lacerations
Battle won scars
Deep emotional trauma
Invisible yet touch tender,
All painfully gotten
Along this journey called life,
Ultra sensitive to a
Word out of context, a
Certain tone of voice
Leads to misinterpretation
Crossed lines
Lashing out
Barbed comments
Prickly words
Flashes of anger,
Admittedly
From a place of pain,
Yet repeatedly
Time after time
Bit by bit,
Understandably
Leads to withdrawal
Drawbridge hoisted up
Kept at arms bay
And the biggest fear of all,
Disconnection,
Though the opposite is what I crave most,
But there’s no one else to blame now
For I am the cause
The symptom
The trigger
The wounds red raw
And those barbs a ******
For trauma has a way of hanging around
Leaving its entrails behind
Feb 2021 · 91
Bereft
SiouxF Feb 2021
In so many ways I’m flying
My life is picking up
And starting to flow.
But in other ways
I still feel
I keep ******* up,
I’m missing that vital ingredient
That will slot everything into place.
Perhaps something
In all the pain and torment I went through
Has been irreparably damaged
And can never be repaired
Leaving me bereft
And forever set apart.
Jan 2021 · 411
Mistakes
SiouxF Jan 2021
Mistakes
Are the lessons
We learn
On our path
To Greatness
🌈 🌟
Jan 2021 · 212
Trust
SiouxF Jan 2021
Learning to trust for the first time
After years of abuse
From those in position of power
Who should have known better.
Hope,
Faith,
Freedom from doubt,
Complete confidence in another.
But how can you trust
When you never really know
What’s going on inside another?
SiouxF Jan 2021
“I seem to have loved you in numberless forms, numberless times…
In life after life, in age after age, forever.
My spellbound heart has made and remade the necklace of songs,
That you take as a gift, wear round your neck in your many forms,
In life after life, in age after age, forever.

Whenever I hear old chronicles of love, its age-old pain,
Its ancient tale of being apart or together.
As I stare on and on into the past, in the end you emerge,
Clad in the light of a pole-star piercing the darkness of time:
You become an image of what is remembered forever.

You and I have floated here on the stream that brings from the fount.
At the heart of time, love of one for another.
We have played along side millions of lovers, shared in the same
Shy sweetness of meeting, the same distressful tears of farewell-
Old love but in shapes that renew and renew forever.

Today it is heaped at your feet, it has found its end in you
The love of all man’s days both past and forever:
Universal joy, universal sorrow, universal life.
The memories of all loves merging with this one love of ours –
And the songs of every poet past and forever.”

~Rabindranath Tagore
Jan 2021 · 794
Contentment
SiouxF Jan 2021
Happiness, sadness,
Two contrasting emotions,
Both transitory.
Aim for contentment,
Acceptance of what is,
And what’s not,
And gratitude for all of it.
With this and
A firm gaze
Upon your dreams
You can achieve anything
You set your mind to
With grace and determination
Jan 2021 · 564
Lay Down Your Weapons
SiouxF Jan 2021
Lay down your weapons
Remove your suit of armour
And sit down next to me my child,
There’s no more need for
Barbed wire or steel,
For all you need is
Faith, Love and Truth.
These three cornerstones are more effective
At striking your opponents,
With love, truth, and
Absolute certainty
Of your righteousness
Jan 2021 · 124
The Candle
SiouxF Jan 2021
Candle burning bright
Lights up the space
With a soft golden glow
Scaring the shadows away,
Its flame dancing with the joy
Of being alive,
Offering much needed
Hope,
Lightness, and
Freedom
To all those who seek.
Jan 2021 · 149
Flower Filled Meadows
SiouxF Jan 2021
50 years acting defensively,
A shield against the attacks and abuse,
Barbed words, scorn and contempt.
Lashing out inappropriately,
The only path known,
A form of protection
A semblance of normality,
Instead ending up
Disconnected,
Lonely,
Alone.

Now discovering another way to be,
Dragging myself from the enticing
Well-worn familiar slippery path
Of melancholy and self-flagellation,
To flower filled meadows
And babbling brook
And choosing my own way
Through the long sweet grass,
To as yet undreamt
And unimagined,
But long overdue,
Pleasures, delights, and food for the soul.
Jan 2021 · 319
Lost
SiouxF Jan 2021
Lost in the wilderness
Of my mind,
All adrift at sea,
Disappearing down rabbit holes
Of my making,
Stuck in a spider web of confusion,
Roaming deep dark paths
Of uncertainty, worry and pain,
Distracted by devilish thoughts,
Seductively drawn into the deep murky depths
Of the abyss.
Jan 2021 · 164
Faux Ties
SiouxF Jan 2021
Let go of these ties
That bind me
Hold me
Keep me
In a prison
Caused by another
But now of my own making.
If you were to only see
That which constrains you,
Just floating weeds
Drifting like hornwort,
Root free
No attachment
To anything
Except you.
Change of perception
And change of direction
Is all it takes to release you
From this lifetime
Of drudgery and pain,
And raise you up
Towards sun’s glow
Right where you belong
Jan 2021 · 93
Dream Big
SiouxF Jan 2021
Dream big he said,
Focus on your deepest desires
That only you know,
Create your future,
Visualise your destiny,
Take responsibility for your life.
But I wasn’t quite ready,
I hadn’t yet learned
How to
Bring joy in my heart,
How to
Make my heart sing,
How to
Open up my heart
And let love flow.
I hadn’t yet given myself permission,
So I stayed in my shell
Playing small
In my uncomfortable
Comfort zone
Jan 2021 · 200
Heavy Heart
SiouxF Jan 2021
Oh heavy heart of mine
Why do you struggle so?
Ridding yourself of this millstone
Casting off your sin
Freeing yourself of this burden
Of pain, suffering and torment,
Oh melancholy are ye.
How do I let go
Of this oppressiveness,
How do I cut this tie
Of suppression,
How do I remove
This crushing load from my back?
Show me the way oh Lord
For I come to you
Weary, tired, broken
And seeking another way to be,
Show me the light
Anoint me with your oil
Help me to
Bathe in your love
Know your compassion
Accept your forgiveness
Surrender myself to your will,
And give me hope
Even as I struggle to forgive myself
Jan 2021 · 166
Is It Too Much?
SiouxF Jan 2021
Is it too much to ask
To be heard
To be listened to
To be seen
To be remembered?
Jan 2021 · 132
It’s All Made Up
SiouxF Jan 2021
It’s all meaningless.
It’s all made up.
It’s not reality.
Whichever thoughts and feelings you choose,
Positive
Negative
Fear
Love
None of it is real,
Because you can change it in an instant,
But we make it so,
So choose wisely
For your path will be
More or less smooth, and
Yours and others’ journeys
Easier or more painful to bear
Depending on which you select,
So why not enjoy the ride
Jan 2021 · 179
Like A Tortoise?
SiouxF Jan 2021
The tortoise is a gentle placid creature with a hard shell,
Peeking his head and limbs out
Ambling along
Eating lettuce and grapes
Slowly, calmly, patiently,
Knowing he can retreat into the safety and comfort of his shell
Whenever he feels in danger,
Or to rest, to recuperate, to sleep.

I feel like a tortoise
With my hard shell,
Rarely peeking my head out
But when I do,
Rather than gentleness,
There’s aggression,
Attacking with barbed words that
Slice like a knife through kindness proffered,
My filter of negativity, distrust and insecurity
Biting the hand of anyone who dares get close
Scaring them off
Before retreating back inside my shell
Bruised and battered,
But rather than being a safe haven, a home, a place of comfort,
It’s full of pain, torment and loneliness
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