Willow

Willow Jul 2018

These are the words I would never tell you,
Your smile, your eyes, your hair, that is just a plus to you, but your personality is the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. I thought after one year, the crush would be over but I was wrong.
7 years later and I'm still completely and utterly in love with you. You're the person I look for when I walk in a room, you're the person I can mess with their hair and wouldn't care. You're the person that I can throw a pencil at and make you pick it up and wouldn't get mad. You're the only man I trust, and you know how much I don't trust them. But I know I can tell every single secret but one and you wouldn't tell another soul. When you told me you believed in me, a piece of my broken heart went into it's place like a puzzle piece.

Wasn't sure if I wanted to publish this or not but **** it.

The secret I can't tell him is that I love him :)

#love #loving #him #broken #heart #puzzle #piece #soul #mate #smile

Willow Jul 2018

The struggle is real...

When you write a whole poem and you accidentally delete it.

#heartbreak #heartbroken

Willow Jul 2018

THE HALL OF MEMORIES

Walking down the hall,
The hall of memories,
When I was happy and carefree.
Every time I look at them,
I wish I could go back and relive them.
Relive the best moments in life
because ever since I was 8,
my happiness was ruined.

I walk down the hall and
look at every single photo.
I try to remember that day
in which that photo was taken,
and when I do remember, I space
out and start crying because
I know that I will never be that happy
again.

When I get to the photo of a baby picture,
I stop and think, what an innocent little body
and face, I wonder what it would be like
if my innocence wasn't taken.

#baby #walking #memory #memories #back #relive #happiness #photo #cry #taken

Willow Jul 2018

It's Funny How...

It's funny how when you were younger, you would say in your mind,"I would never do that." Here I am doing all the things I said I wouldn't do, self harm, anorexia, suicidal thoughts.

#anorexia #anorexic #suicide #thoughts #younger #mind #selfharm #never

Willow Jul 2018

You made me

You took my childhood, you matured me too young.
I looked for you in other people, but I never found you.
You bruised and broke my heart.
My tiny little heart.
You made me want to die at the age of 8, you made me hate my body at the age of 10.
You made me attempt suicide at the age of 11.
You made me cut at the age of 12.
You made me anorexic at the age of 13.
You made me believe that I am worthless because even my father didn't love me.
You made me believe that I could and never would find love.
You made me believe that happiness was a joke.

#father #childhood #heart #broken #hate #mature #anorexia #suicide

Willow Jul 2018

"If you could change one thing about yourself, what would you change? "

I recently watched a YouTube video, they asked all ages, "If you could change one thing about you, what would you change?"
The elders said, "Nothing because you learn to love yourself," the middle ages people stated features. The young children said, " I want a mermaid tail" or "I want shark teeth." It's so fascinating on how little children who are innocent as a baby cub, they are so carefree and don't have to worry as much, they have their own little imagination. Which just tells you, growing up changes your innocent mind.

IF SOMEONE ASKED YOU, " IF YOU COULD CHANGE ONE THING ABOUT YOURSELF, WHAT WOULD YOU CHANGE?"

WHAT WOULD YOU SAY?

#children #child #youtube #video #innocent

Willow Jul 2018

Dear Dog,

Inka, I want to thank you for being my support dog in a way. Sure you were never trained but you have always been there when no one else was. You were the reason I'm still here today.
You have seen me happy, angry, sad. You have seen my break downs, my purging moments and my cutting sessions. You have seen it all. You are now 6, I can't believe it. You have grown so much. I sound like a mother, but it would be like I am losing my baby, my everything. I am laying here with you, my big chocolate covered marshmallow telling you I love you. I wish that you could stay longer on earth, but humans don't deserve dogs.
You are an angel and angels are too pure to live on this cruel world for too long. I hope you stay with me after though, I hope you will always be my little couch potato with me. Sure you could be in dog heaven too, but I will always have popcorn for you so win win, right? I don't know what I would do without you. I know I would be the biggest cry baby ever, and you won't be there to lick my tears away. I don't know why people say Pitbulls are the worst dogs because I think you are one of the best. I hope when I die, I will be with you. I remember when we first got you, you would **** so much I had a clip with me all the time to clip my nose. Oh, and you pooped on my brother's shoes, I knew I was going to love you when you did that. Thank you for being my thing to hug because I always felt I was going to break down in front of someone if I hugged them, but with you I didn't care. Thank you for being my warmth and pillow at night. Thank you for licking my tears away. Thank you for keeping a smile on my face. Thank you for being my little bit of happiness. Thank you for being my dog. You will always be on my mind and in my heart. My big chocolate covered marshmallow, Inka.

#dog #heart #world #angel #pitbull #dear #always #love #lovely #life