You were the number one my whole life,
You were there when I turned five.
We used to be best friends,
But everything someday ends.

We drifted apart over time,
You became more sour than a lime.
From heaven to war we went,
What was said I hope wasn’t meant.

I still love you and always will,
Even with all the bad you spill.
I stand tall when you talk,
Yet some words still leave me in shock.

I cry when the night comes,
The words hurting me are my mom’s.
Scared to speak to protect you,
Don’t have an opinion, that’s what I do.

Never give up they say,
Give it time for a better day.
She is family don’t cut her out,
But I don’t want to continue on this route.

I can’t fix things when you don’t care,
I suffer because of you’re how is that fair.
I don’t wanna lose my own mom,
Yet your presence won’t leave me calm.

Friends again just in my dreams,
It is exactly how it seems.
I write this to ease my mind,
To help leave hard feelings behind.

Only time will tell,
If we’re ever getting out of this hell.
Hope it is soon or I will quit,
But I will regret every bit.

First he left now so did you,
But he came back as I grew.
You left me because I am sick,
Became very distant pretty quick.

Now you don’t care at all,
All I have is our daily call.
We barely talk when I am home,
All the time I feel alone.

God give me a reason to try again,
I want to stop this deep pain.

They say time fixes everything,
you just have to keep holding onto a string.
One day you´ll feel ok again,
there won´t be any more pain.

Keep telling me to see things from your position,
yet you refuse to understand my condition.

I am drowning and you are to blame,
you won´t even say my real name.
I had to lie for most of my life,
had to pretend I want to be the wife.

Terrified to come clean,
I started being mean.
Not to others but to me,
wished I would never be.

All you saw was that smile,
a slight change of style.
Body hidden under clothes,
make sure it never shows.