And I'll try to delay what you make of my life
But I don't want your way,
I want mine

I’m lying, I’m so very far from fine

I don’t believe, in talking just to breathe

I’m here to give you words as tools that can destroy my heart

He thinks that faith might be dead
Nothing kills a man faster than his own head

*** nobody knows he’s alive

I want to crack the door so I can just fall out

I begin to understand why god died

And I want everyone to know that I am half a soul divided

Don’t be afraid. We’re going home.

We had to steal him from his fate so he could see another day

Am I alive and well or am I dreaming dead?

Where all your blood is washed away and all you did will be undone

We pick songs to sing remind us of things that nobody cares about and honestly we’re probably more suicidal than ever now

If we wake up every morning and decide what we believe we can take apart our very heart and the light will set us free

Please don’t be afraid of what your soul is really thinking

It’s time you pick your battle, and I promise you this is mine.

I know what you think in the morning when the sun shines on the ground

But there’s hope out the window, so that’s where we’ll go, let’s go outside and all join hands but until then you’ll never understand

Simply suggest my chest in this confused music it’s obviously best for them to turn their guns to a fist.

I’m taking over my body back in control no more shorty

I fought it a lot and it seems a lot like flesh is all I got not anymore

You should take my life, you should take my soul

You are surrounding all my surroundings

Fight it. Take the pain ignite it tie a noose around your mind loose enough to breathe fine and tie it to a tree tell it “you belong to me this ain’t a noose this is a leash and I have news for you, you must obey me”

It ain’t the speakers that bump hearts, it’s our hearts that make the beat.

I’m pleading please oh please, on my knees repeatedly asking why it’s got to be like this, is this living free?

Some see a pen I see a harpoon.

I’ll stay awake, *** the dark’s not taking prisoners tonight

I don’t hear those voices calling, I must’ve kicked them out

Why won’t you let me go? Do I threaten all your plans I’m insignificant

I’m afraid to tell you who I adore, won’t tell you who I’m singing towards

I know it’s dire my time today

Somebody stole my car radio and now I just sit in silence

Sometimes quiet is violent
I find it hard to hide it my pride is no longer inside it’s on my sleeve my skin will scream

There’s no hiding for me I’m forced to deal with what I feel there is no distraction to mask what is real

This time there’s no sound to hide behind

I find over the course of our human existence one thing consists of consistence and it’s that we’re all battling fear oh dear I don’t know if we know why we’re here oh my too deep please stop thinking

Peace will win and fear will lose

There’s faith and there’s sleep we need to pick one please because faith is to be awake and to be awake is for us to think and for us to think is to be alive and I will try with every rhyme to come across like I am dying to let you know you need to try to think.

I don’t wanna be heard, I wanna be listened to.

I scream you scream we all scream *** we’re terrified of what’s around the corner.

My brain has given up, white flags are hoisted

The stomach in my brain throws up onto the page

I don’t understand why everything I adore takes a different form when I squint my eyes have you ever done that when you squint your eyes and your eyelashes make it look a little bit right and then when just enough light comes from just the right side and you find you’re not who you’re supposed to be?
This is not what you’re supposed to see, please, remember me I am supposed to be king of kingdom, swinging on a swing, something happened in my imagination the situations becoming dire, my treehouse is on fire, and for some reason I smell gas on my hands. This is not what I had planned.

We’ll be on fire

We have romantic fantasies about what dying truly is

We all know somebody who knows somebody who’s doing great, I know some people who know people who are flying straight, but I’ll kindly enter into rooms of depression, while ceiling fans and idle hands will take my life again.

But I would rather sing a song, for the eyes to sing along

I’m holding onto what I know and what I know I must let go

Redemption’s not that far and darkness is going down.

Nobody thinks what I think, nobody dreams when they blink, think things on the brink of blasphemy I’m my own shrink think things are after me, my catastrophe.

Are you searching for purpose? Then write something and it might be worthless, paint something yeah it might be wordless pointless curses nonsense verses you’ll see purpose start to surface, no one else is dealing with your demons meaning maybe defeating them could be the beginning of your meaning friend.

They will play a game and say they know what you’re doing through and I tried to come up with an artistic way to say they don’t know you and neither do I

I hear a second voice behind your tongue somehow

They will not take you down they will not cast you out

Dear friends here we are again pretending to understand how you think your world is ending sendin signals and red flags in waves it’s hard to tell the difference between blood and water these days
I pray that one day you see
The only difference between life and dying
Is one is trying that’s all we’re gonna do so try to love me and I’ll try to save you

Won’t you stay alive I’ll take you on a ride, I will make you believe you are lovely

Your redemption won’t grow stale, we are now just setting sail, on the seas of what we fear, treason now is growing near to me, I’m coming clean, god hit me straight on.

I know, where you stand, silent in the trees
And that’s where I am

Why won’t you speak, where I happen to Be? Silent in the trees standing cowardly
I can feel your breath, I can feel my death.
I want to know you, I want to see, I want to say, hello

I don’t believe my ears and I’m scared of my own head.

Clearly I am dying, dearly I am writing

I’m lying cause I say I am fine

I’m so sorry but I do believe that all my bridges I have burned and I’ve earned a policy of no return

Today, day, I want to go away, way

I put my sock on my feet, just so that my soul would fall through my toes, And I walk through my door, just so I don’t fall through the floor.

So bold and fearless in the risks we take, laugh in the face of gravity as it’s laws we’d break, on trampolines so high, we reach for the sky, but I do not look up anymore and I don’t know why.

I take my face off at the door because I don’t know who they will take me for

I’m the son of all I’ve done

When we’re done we’ll all have made something new under the sun

“Where’s your home? Where are you going and why are you here?”

I will tell you what I can, but your mind will take a stand, I sing of a greater love, let me know when you’ve had enough.

When your father turns to stone will you take care of me?
I will make you queen of everything you see, I’ll put you on the map, I’ll cure you of disease.
Let’s say we up and left this town and turned our future upside down, we’ll make pretend that you and me, lived ever after happily.

Since we know that dreams are dead, and life turns plans up on their head, I will plan to be a *** so I just might become someone.

Taking my only, friend I know. He leaves a lot. His name is Hope.

I’m never what I like, I’m double sided

*** I’m twisted up, I’m twisted up, inside my mind

When the sun is climbing window sills, and the silver lining rides the hills, I will be safe, for one whole day, until the sun makes the hills it’s grave.

By the time the nights wears off, the dust is down, and shadows burn, I will rise and stand my ground, waiting for, the nights return.

I do not know why I would go in front of you na shied my soul, *** you’re the only one who knows it

I don’t know why I think I could lie, *** there’s a screen on my chest

I’m standing in front of you I’m trying to be so cool, everything together trying to be so cool.

I can’t see past my own nose I’m seeing everything in slow-mo look out below crashing down to the ground

A train from the sky locomotive my motives are insane
My flows not great okay, I conversation with people who know if I flow on a song I’ll get no radio play.
While you’re doing fine, there’s some people and I, who have a really tough time getting through this life so excuse us while we sing to the sky.

We’re broken people

I can’t take them on my own, my own, pa, I’m not the one you know, you know

Don’t wanna give you all my demons, you’ll have to watch me struggle, from several rooms away. But tonight, I need you to stay.

I am up against the wall, the wall, pa, I hear them coming down, the hall.

I want to drive away in the night, headlights call my name.
I’ll never be, be what you see inside, you say I’m not alone but I am petrified.

Is close the closest star? You just feel twice as far.

I’m so afraid, of what you have to say, cause I am quiet now, and silence gives you space

And the wrists of my mind had the bleeding lines that remind me of all the times I have committed

What kids are doing they’re killing themselves, they feel they have no control of their prisoner cells, and if you’re one of them then you’re one of me

Now the night is coming to an end

The sun will rise and we will try again

Stay alive, stay alive, for me.
You will die, but now your life is free take pride in what is sure to die.

I will fear the night again.

I hope I’m not my only friend.

There’s an infestation in my minds imagination

This not rap this is not hip hop, just another attempt to make the voices stop

This doesn’t mean I lost my dream it’s just right now I got a really crazy mind to clean.

Can you save my heavydirtysoul, for me?

If I didn’t know better I’d guess you’re all already dead

You’ve got one time to figure it out, one time to twist and one time to shout, one time to think and I say we start now

Death inspires me like a dog inspires a rabbit

I wish I found some better sounds no ones ever heard, I wish I had a better voice to sing some better words, I wish I found some chords in an order that is new, I wish I didn’t have to rhyme every time I sang

Now I’m insecure, and I care what people think.

Sometimes a certain smell will take me back to when I was young, how come I’m never able to identify where it’s coming from?

It would remind us of when nothing really mattered out of student loans and treehouse homes we all would take the ladder.

We used to play pretend give eachother different names

Used to dream of outer space but now they’re laughing at our face saying wake up you need to make money

I wanna stay in the sun where I find, I know it’s hard sometimes

I think about the end just way too much, but it’s fun to fantasize

I won’t fall in love with falling

I’d die for you that’s easy to say we have a list of people that we would take a bullet for them a bullet for you

Metaphorically I’m the man but literally I don’t know what I’d do, that’s harder to do even harder to say when you know it’s not true and it’s harder to write when you know that tonight there were people back home that tried talking to you

All these questions they’re for real like who would you live for who would you die for and would you ever ****?

I’ve been thinking too much, help me

I’m fairly local, ive been around, ive seen the streets you’re walking down

I’m evil to the core, what I shouldn’t do I will, they say I’m emotional, what I wanna save I’ll ****. Is that who I truly am? I truly don’t have a chance. Tomorrow I keep a beat. And repeat yesterday’s dance

I’m not evil to the core, what I shouldn’t do I will fight. I know I’m emotional, what I wanna save I will try. I know who I truly am. I truly do have a chance. Tomorrow I’ll switch the beat, to avoid yesterday’s dance

It’s the few the proud and the emotional

The world around us is burning but we’re so cold

Our minds change on what we think is good, I wasn’t raised in the hood, but I know a thing or two about pain, and darkness, if wasn’t for the music I don’t know how I would’ve fought this.

I’m in constant confrontation with what I want and what is poppin in the industry it seems to me that singles on the radio are currency my creativities only free when I’m playing shows.

Who would you live and die for on that list but the problem is there’s another list that exists and none really wants to think about this forget sanity, forget salary, forget vanity my morality, if you get in between someone I love and me, you’re gonna feel the heat of my calvary

He cranked out those dismal chords, and his four walls declared him insane.

I found my way right time wrong place

I know my souls freezing hells hot for good reason

But I’m not good with directions and I hide behind my mouth, I’m a pro at imperfections and I’m best friends with my doubt.
Now that minds out and now I hear clear and loud I’m thinking wow I probably should’ve stayed inside my house

I don’t know if this song is a surrender or a revel. I don’t know if this one is about me or the devil.

Help me out, my friends and I we got a lotta problems

Wanted to be a better brother better son wanted to be a better advisory to the evil I have done I have none to show to the one I love

Polarize is taking your disguises sepersting then splitting them up from wrong and right, is deciding when to die and deciding when to fight

I don’t know where you are, you’ll have to come and find me

We have all learned to **** our dreams

I need to know that when I fail you’ll still be here. *** if you stick around I’ll sing you pretty sounds and well make money selling your hair

I don’t care what’s in your hair I just wanna know what’s on your mind.
I used to say I wanna die before I’m old but because if you I might think twice.

What if my dream does not happen. Would I just change what I’ve told my friend. Don’t want to know who I would be. When I wake from a dreamers sleep

Scared of my own image. Scared of my own immaturity

Fear might be the death of me. Fear leads to anxiety. Don’t know what’s inside of me.

Even when I doubt you, I’m no good without you.

Temperature is dropping, I’m not sure if I can see this ever stopping. Shaking hands with the dark parts of my thought no, you ar wall that I’ve got no.

I want the markings made on my skin, to mean something to me again.

Hope you haven’t left without me, please

Who I am today is worse than other times. You don’t know what I’ve done.

Why I’m in denial that they tried the suicidal session. Please use discretion when you’re messing with the message man, these lyrics aren’t for everyone only few understand.

Hope you’re dead *** how could you sleep at a time like this

I’m the kinda guy who takes every moment he knows he confided in
Music to use for others to use it

Life is up here but you comment below And the comments below will become
Common motivation to promote
Your shows next episode
So your brain know to keep going
Even though hope
Is far from this moment but you and I know it gets better when mornin finally reads it’s head, together we’re losers remember the future remember the mornin is when night is dead.

My people singing

Be the one to take my soul and make it undone

Be the one to take me home and show me the sun

Where we’re from, there’s no sun, our hometowns in the dark
Where we’re from, we’re no one, our hometowns in the dark.

We don’t know, how to put back the power in our soul

We don’t know, where to find, what once was in our bones.

I look outside and see a whole world better off without me in it trying to transform it.

Listen I know, this ones a contradiction because of how happy it sounds. But the lyrics are so down.
It’s ok though, because it represents Wait better yet it is, who I feel I am right now.

I’m a goner, somebody catch my breath

I wanna be known, by you.

Though I’m weak, and beaten down. I’ll slip away, into this sound.
The ghost of you is close to me.
I’m inside out, you’re underneath.

I’ve got two faces, blurry’s the one I’m not

I need your help to take him out

Don’t let me be gone.

I can’t believe how much I hate.
Pressures of a new place roll my way.

Spirits in my room, friend or foe?
Felt it in my youth feel it when I’m old

I’ll be right there, but you’ll have to grab my throat and life me in the air. If you need anyone
I’ll stop my plans, but you’ll have to tie me down and then break both my hands.

You can learn to levitate with just a little help

Cowards only come through when the hours late and everyone’s asleep mind you

My heart is with you hiding but my minds not made

No we are not just graffiti on a passing train I got back what I once bought back in that slot I won’t need to replace

Sever all I thought I could depend on my weekends on the freezing ground that I’m sleeping on please keep me from please keep me down from the ledges

At least they all know all they hear comes from a place.

When everyone, you thought you know, deserts your fight, I’ll go with you
You’re facing down, a dark hall, I’ll grab my light and go with you

Surrounded and  up against a wall, I’ll shred em all. And go with you
When choices end, you must defend, I’ll grab a bat, and go with you

Stay with me, no you don’t need to run, stay with me, my blood.

They’re callin for your head and they’re callin for your name, I’ll bomb down on em I’m comin through

Just keep it outside

If you find yourself, in a lions den, I’ll jump right in, and pull my pin.

East is up, I’m fearless when I hear this on the low
Easy is up, I’m careless when I wear my rebel clothes

They will know that, Dema don’t control us

They wanna make you forget

Save your razor blades now, not yet

I’m flying from a fire, from Nico and the Niners.

What I say when I wanna be enough what a beautiful day for making a break for it, we’ll find a way to pay for it, maybe from all the money we made razor blade stores, rent a race horse, and force a sponsor, and start a concert a complete diversion, start a mob and you can be quite certain we’ll win but not everyone will get out.

Can’t stop thinking about if and when I die for now I see that if and when are trike different cries for If is purely panic and when is solemn sorrow and one invade today while the other spies tomorrow

If I keep moving they won’t know I’ll morph to someone else

I’m just a ghost

Defence mechanism mode

What are we here for if not to run straight through all our tormentors

Anybody listening?

This beat is a chemical

Lovin what I’m tasting
Venom on my tongue
Dependant at times
Poisonous vibrations

I’m running for my life

Hide you in my coat pocket

Felt I was invincible you wrapped around my head now different lives I lead my body lives on lead the last two lines may read incorrect until said

I despise you sometimes I love to hate the fight and you in much life is like sippin on straight chlorine

Grows while I decay

Can you build my house with pieces I’m just a chemical

My interior world needs to sanitize
I’ve got to step through or I’ll dissipate
I’ll record my step through for my basement tapes

Nice to my kind will be on my side

And you know you’re a terrible sight but you’ll Be just fine

Your exterior world can step off instead
It might take some friends and a warmer shirt but you don’t get thick skin without getting burnt

No I don’t know which way I’m going
But I can hear my way around

I never look for conflict for the thrill

For you I would get beat to smithereens

And my problem? We glorify those even more when they

My opinion our culture could treat a loss like it’s a win and right before we turn on them we give them the highest of praise and hang their banner from the ceiling communicating further ingravjng and earlier grace is an optional way. No.

What’s my problem don’t get it twisted it’s with the people we praise who may have assisted

I could go out with a band they would know my name they would host and post a celebration . My opinion will not be lenient

We don’t get enough love well they get a fraction they say how could he go if he’s got everything I’ll mourn for a kid but won’t cry for a king.

Neon gravestones try to call for my bones

Promise me this. If I lose to myself you won’t mourn a day and you’ll move on to someone else

But they won’t get them

Don’t get me wrong the rise in awareness is beating a stigma that no longer scares us but for sake of discussion in spirit of fairness could we give this some room for a new point of view and could it be true that some could be tempted to use this mistake as a form of aggression a form of succession a form of a weapon thinking I’ll teach them well in refusing the lesson it won’t resonate in our minds I’m not disrespecting what was left behind just pleading that it does not get glorified maybe we swap out what’s it is that we hold so high. Find your grandparents or someone of age. Pay some respects for the other that they paved to life they were dedicated now that should be celebrated.

I could take the high road but I know that I’m going low

I’m a bandito

This is the sound we make when in between two places where we used to bleed and where our blood needs to be

In city I feel my spirit is contained like neon inside the glass they form my brain but I recently discovered it’s a heartless fire like nicknames they give themselves to uninspire begin with bullet now add fire to the proof but I’m still not sure if fears a rival or close relative to truth either way it helps to hear these words bounce off of you the softest school could be enough for me to make it through

I created this world to feel some control destroy it if I want so I sing Sahlo Folina

I can feel pressure start to posses my mind so I’ll take this beat I should delete to exercise

No I move slow I wanna stop time I’ll sit here til I find the problem

This clique means so much to this dude it could make him afraid of his music and be scared to death he could lose it

You were one of those classic ones
Traveling around this sun

I wish she knew you

You were here when I write this but the masters and mixes will take to long to finish to show you I’m sorry I did not visit did not know how to take it when your eyes did not know me like I know you

Then the day that it happened I recorded this last bit I look forward to having a lunch with you again

I’m tired of tending to this fire

Embers barely showing proof of life in the shadows dancing on my plans

They know that it’s  almost over

The burning is so low it’s concerning *** they know that when it goes out it’s a glorious gone
It’s only time before they show me why no one ever comes back with details from beyond

In time I will leave the city for now I will stay alive

Last year I needed change of pace
Couldn’t take the pace of change
Moving hastily
But this year
Though I’m far from home
In trench inches not alone
These faces facing me
They know what I mean.

I can hear him,
Hear him long 'fore I sees him.
Can hear him stompin
Stompin 'cross the ceilin
Of the earth like he mad at the world.
Mad at us for just bein.
Rain Man stomp so hard
he send the wind runnin
runnin hard runnin mad
kickin up dust an' pickin up leaves
Screamin at the top of her lungs
Pull down ya garments
and shut up yo hatches.
Call in yo chillun's 'cause
Lawd I declare
The Rain Man comin'
 
I can see him now
sees him off in the distance.
Talltoweringhulk of man.
Skin real dark.
But not that ******-baby
kinda dark what look
like somethin dead been
drug through the mudndipped in tar
with fat uncooked sausages for lips
like they got in the picture shows
an shoppin books.
Nah this that pretty kinda dark
Night sky kinda dark
dark so deep
ya get lost in it and find God there too.
Yeah, he got that pretty dark.
But he got them eyes,
them pretty white eyes
sparkle so hard like God
plucked the North star and the Pointer star
right out the sky and stuckem
in his face.
His hair, thick black coils of hair,
grow like kudzu stretch down
his back and move in the wind like
snakes with minds of they own.
He turns his head backnforth
sendin them vines
flyin
stretchin stretchin to forever till
CRACK
they snap back,
snap back so hard they like to
split the air with fury
that shook me to my soul.
 
I can feel him now
feel him as he wraps me in his arms,
what seem to be made of steel, and
pull me into that chest made of
mountain stones firm
firm like the earth I ain't no
longer standin on 'cause he
picked me up clear off my feet
no connection to the ground but him.
I wrap my birdy lil arms round
his neck and bury my
bony lil fingers in the
layers of his hair.
I can feel the warmth
roll offa him in waves
waves like the ones cornfields
make when they kissed by wind,
or maybe even waves like them from
the sea as they reach out for land to
save them from drownin just 'fore
they fall back into the sea, I just
know that he feel good.
 
I can smell him,
smell every bit of him as I
bury my head deeper into his neck.
He smell warm like the earth,
like red clay smell after he and sun
done made out all day, warm like a
man smell after he done spent
all day hunch backed starin
at the earth tryna trick her to
give'm just a lil somethin to eat.
Even his clothes, holey rags they are,
smell like smoke but not that
cold angry smoke what come from the
factory, not that black stuff what
puff itself up to block out the sun
like he mad at her for shinin so pretty.
Nah, his smoke smell like that soft
gray smoke that drifts lazy-like from
daddy's shed after he done bled a
pig for us to eat during winter.
His smokeyness smell like earth.
 
I can taste him
taste every memory of him
as I kiss blindly startin at his
neck workin my way up
tryna find his mouth.
Every inch of his face taste sweet,
like the caramel candies them old
ladies at church carry round in they bags,
made even sweeter by the salty tang
of each bead of sweat as it tumbles
down his face and drips on my blouse
stainin the pretty lil flowers.
All I know is he taste good.

Its timeto yoke the joker


yo to the emcees that think they could get with me
i wet em like an ocean tide personality like jekyll and hide
which means im a killa slash for short drama no comma imma
brutal emcee eatin' 'em up the best of em im the lyrical cannibal
flesh rent devil sent no need for repent
comin' with wickedness born with 8 flows if ya only knew
******* come in the sets of three im givin' wishes for free
the rap genie aint' comin' to be a hero the black zorro thorrough
shoot up the barrio dead eye hawkin' assassin' blastin'
with the greatest tech mouth shots or physical shots it don't matter
whatever it takes to get the job done
my posse cocked d slapped you *******
you can smoke all the spinach you want and you leave like popeyes
get it naw forget sensitive ******* i knit it
write in graffiti love hoes shape like Nefertiti queen b goddess
never a ***** **** in my encore **** with me and ill bring the war along with gore
******* never been a softie
daddy had to be a gangsta **** hustler drug dealer all summed in one
so i had no choice but to pack a gun
but meanwhile im onto bigger and better things like rappin' on the mic i cling
flows tighter rhan pliers leave emcees wrapped up like cable wires
the sire embraced higher learning spurning over obstacles
turn complexity into miracles
how could i ever fall if i never fall failure not an acceptation
id rather sells drugs and extortion and get caught wit 25 big ones
fed time **** the state time im on the grind one time
always wanna see me fall black man finna rise planet of the apes style
hot and wild j ceasar with these skills i spills sendin' chills
its an ice age all over just say its over when big yosef grab the mic
prepare for fright when i ignite blast through hearts like a cannon
i just smoke ya ya mediocre its time to yoke these jokers
yea
 

I asked him I said “don’t lie to me”
Give it a couple weeks but after that
then he be denying me,
take without supplying me
With the way we started
I guess this **** is irony, this **** is irony
If I told this would happen
Would you try to stop it?
Lay back in the mayback
Sit and wait
N Try to watch it
Boy I know we had our problems,
But you ain’t work to solve them
I been thru all this last year
I think that I’m revolvin
I’ve been thru this **** before
I took all of the detours
He told that he loves me
But it seems he always needs more
I can be the best for you
I’m so focused on you but you focused on what drug next for you
I know I have my issues but at least I try to fix it
You said that loves a game,
You say we swung and that we missed it
Switched up in an instant
We went from hugs and kisses
To tryna keep our distance
We barely speak our words
But I know you feel this verse
Ain’t denying it, I miss you
So I prey to god it hurts
I tried and tried and tried with you
I knew that I would ride for you
It really takes some honesty
And know I barely lied to you
Love was thrown around so let me be the last to save you...

I knew I should’ve expected this
Maybe you ain’t it no more
But I sure need to check for this
I tried everything so I think it’s time for an extra man, what extra man?
No this not a diss track,
But baby you ain’t it no more
So you can get your ***** back, get your ***** back
No regrets except for you,
Shoulda up and left on you
This is all yours so keep listen
And the rest for you
Love is gonna throw you out,
Told my friends I had no doubt, had no doubt yah yah had no doubt
Can’t believe that I defended you,
Broken hearts I’d mend for you
I used to send long paragraphs
But now this song in sendin you
It’s broken
I won’t bend for you
I won’t bend for you
Nah I won’t bend for you
You get on my nerves,
But it used to be my mind
I used to think you’re perfect
It’s a ****** waste of time
And I swear i keep searchin
But your type is all I find
All I find
Yah yah you’re all I find
Pretending you don’t know me gone be hard after this
Thought that I was done
Still goin hard after this
Baby we was up to bat
I guess we all gotta me,
We all gotta miss

But I should say thanks
I’m super focused now
You don’t want it?
That’s okay I won’t go hold you down
Used to spend my nights
We’d fall asleep on the call
Now I spend my nights I sleep quite at all
I hate you and I love you
And I wrote to express that
I hate this I hate us
It’s done now, never text back
I’ll send calls to voice mail
I won’t take my ex back
I hope you gonn find better
But baby it don’t get that
Baby It don’t get that

With eyes that take the spit in my mouth and evaporate it.
That take my sense of balance and eradicate it.
Vertigo.
Get up slow.
Walk over for a long hug that feels like a couple seconds
...But I've lost all sense of time
And my words aren't really mine cuz talkin aint really on my mind.
You sendin all kinda signs that you likin what you see,
N I'm sendin all the signs that I'm lovin who I need.
The feel I need,
Got the feel that she'd read me like I've read her.
Diamond in the rough like Esther
And I aint mad at that.
Bright beauty bout to give me cataracts.
N I'm caught in those deep brown ojos
That catch the light just so.
N those eyelashes so long like they tryna lash out n butterfly kiss me.
Baby love me like I think you do,
Let me smell ya scent, get a clue,
I just want a hint of you.

'Hey yeah so I really miss you right now'*
and every day
and every moment of every day.
Please come back.

Man it's been so long since we've hung out
Too many weeks pass my minds got doubt
It gets harder to tell what you believe in
What you sendin to hell
I just try and get in touch with you
No cell phone no phone calls
Things get confused
But here I am
Still praying for you
Still begging for you
Are you gonna return
Does the difference make a difference
Have you completely fell off
I just ask one thing
I don't care what it is
Come back in one piece

I'm comin' home Maggie, fightin' no longer!
They're sendin' me home from that hell of a war.
I've given me best, now I'm done with the fightin'.
There's nothin' can take me away anymore.

It seems like forever that I've been a-travelin',
by air and by boat and by train and by car,
Me heart has been achin' to be here beside ye,
to see ye and kiss ye and hold ye once more.

'Twas once we went laughin' and once we went runnin',
up to the high hills, and down to the shore,
oh do ye remember, we used to go dancin'!
Everyone watched as we burned up the floor!

I'm home again, Maggie, home at last, Maggie!
Wi' only a stump where me leg was before,
I'm home again, Maggie, oh my sweet lassie,
Death's all that can take me-- I'll wander no more.

Trying hard to keep my head
On tight so not to float off
I take these nights with nothin' to do
And write things down so not to feel blue

There is a fight in us all
A fight to block out the silence we all rarely talk about
To hear the crack of the crow outside this window
Is the only stinging blow I've grown to know

To be born in this time is to be born in any other
With the flushing meadows wide with green flashing pride
And the cunning river roaring for all to know and carry
With mother nature smiling all the while admiring

Working through the hours, the minutes, the seconds
Knowing that the open road will soon shout to beckon
Sendin' me out to the great dying unknown
No use to imagine the sights, wouldn't be right

In these forms of high art, high living, all expensively feelin' ******
Where promises of a God were said to be lingering here
But all I'm feeling in these lonesome parts of town
Is nothing but the drop of pin that makes no sound

Take me to a place where I wear no face
To live a life that will die at mid tomorrow night
Take these hours from me and I'll fight for the light
With bloodied knuckles clenching flirty nickels

Tonight these walls are lonesome, *****, and stranded
I'm feeling the touch of what it means to be branded
Tucked in a corner with all the rest of the world
With a head held up but a soul hanging low

Father listen hard when I start speaking to you
What are your next steps in life, what are you gonna do?
There ain't much time for making money in this worried world
You always told me to pick up the heels, fake to be real

Trains exhale their gases screaming screeches outlandish
The sides of my head are tilting as my sides are roundish
Feet are swelling to the size of ripping watermelons
And the eyes are rolling back never wanted to achieve millions

But the tears that smell of whiskey rye
And the breath that wreaks of ashy lies
Has always been the love I've been searching for
Slowly leading my life to a quiet rippling lore

yeah ***** wanna make
enemies with me
ya see me flossing pistols with shining  jewelry
not tryna be purtttty
but im coming with
the wrath of a panther
expanding my legacy
in every community
black folks hispanic folks
stop letting them smoke
out ya mind i grind with as i shine
over enemies they stay worried about me
and how i beat my feet so swiftly
enemies i line em
up one by one
this aint a game son
i be the don next kindred
of the holy one
died like my homie
did at thirty three and a half
Picture me dyin'?
for a world that never
carried about my ***
now these ******* coming fast
flash of my past
but im back to put them on they ***
check my gun blast
to this ***** name "militant returns"
now ya soul burned  body stunned
by my lyrics spittin'
like bullets lock n loaded
explode it
through ya brain cells
i see you aint livn' well
ya see should haven't made enemies with me

ya punk *****


livin in this life
of sin from begin
to the very end
will the father lord
let me in?
casted as a plant
but my roots grew up a ***** up
now im makin' rants
for my childish antics
never panic while i bust at politics
once my pistols hit
ya melon aint no
tellin' or jailin'
me in this penitentiary
i was born rugged
and ill die rugged
life is raw so **** it
gotta set black forts
for the crooked courts
feedin' my thoughts
esoteric knowledge
soon ill be a corpse
for exposing so much
secrecy to all my
known enemies
triple teamin me
it dont matter
the more they come
they more i dump
sendin- bombs like Trump
nah i mean transform on the scene
never puff bio green
coming wicked across yo screen
**** this dream for cream
DC white house i know ya fear me
but shouldn't have made
enemies with mehh

makin coffee in the French press
- sippin the hot coffee
- takin the red line to class
- finally singing after a long time
- looking up & realizing I am existing in Chicago
- feelin good
- knowing I will always stay who I am
- incorporatin the word "truely" into my daily thoughts in order to inspire myself into being true with everything and truely accomplishing everything for myself
- textin my mom and saying I love her
- textin my dad and saying I love him
- sendin my journalism teacher a thank you email
- textin my choir director a hello text
- texting Roni and loving Roni all the time
- stopping on the street and breathing and feelin the air around me because I'm alive
- havin this same feeling tomorrow

My best friend who I think about constantly.
My best friend who I wished to be apart of me.
My best friend who I wish and pray, To have her one day ,safe so I can see her smiles brighter then they are today.
My best friend whos pain kills me too.
My best friend who is the red to my blue.
My best friend theres no one like you,
Im stuck on you like glue,
part we might at times but Itll never end or be thru.
Cause My best friend, you are true.
My best friend, you are real.
I love my best friend, more of a man I will ever be,
bend as you might you the world will never break a woman of steel
My best friend my fortune and wealth , my queen for you i kneel.
On the foreal
Im happy phareel
My best friend, I only wish the best for you.
My bestfriend I only want you to be comfortable.
My bestfriend when I hear you cry I die inside how could any guy hurt such a free spirited butterfly.
**** got me ****** up in many ways
Wanna **** this ***** up payback is a bill the ***** didnt pay. And im all about gettin paid.
Pssh one way..
Back to a soft spot like your cheeks
My best friend I love you with all my might and will,
Your my everything,
there no other who can take your place,
not now nor ever
will there be anybody better,
never will and still till
this day , as ghost as ive become,
such a son of a gun, I **** back and fired
I dont give a ***** at everyone,
I am sorry to ever fired at you.
My boo My true friend real ***** to the end.
MY BEST FRIEND.
YOU ARE WHAT I LOOK FOR IN EVERYONE.
BUT YOU ARE THE ONLY TO EVER HAVE IT.
The chemistry that cooks and sizzle great friendships, we have it...
GREAT CONVOS AND TRUST?
between us its now a habbit.
Laughter? We made it an addiction, theres no1 like you me without life and time lacks conviction,

Its gunna get better
I will never leave
I will never retreat
When you need me
Im there believe me
Im that shadow that hugs the light to your smile
No1 else can see me.
Im the voice that hugs your opinion,
 Never wanna see you down
Never frown
Just hope in the day ill be blessed to still be around,
Everytime i look at you I thank God and nature
How could there make such a woman
So much love your signatures kisses papers.
Your "laters" are an eternity, but as soon as you show im rollin deep
Like the **** your that good thc
That sticky that breaks
Easily
Your indica sendin me to the sky high
With litterature  of your ways
Your butterfly that never had a beginning stage
You was born that way
Back in the day when your daddy made that right choice,
And your mother wow!  But you amazing.
Never phasin the problems
You always there facin them
Head on, trapt cause your headstrong
My bestfriends theres untold reasons why we get along.
Maybe your kryptonite livin three doors downs,
But i still remain strong whenver  you around,
The world stops
Cause your revolving now,
Center of my attention,
Love to hear you speak,
The way nose jiggle when you mad at me yellin,
Haha i cant be mad, you make me smile , like the sayin you got in the bag.... glad
What else i like? Rememer this a prototype,
Only shedding a glipse thoughts in my afternights.



By Deep Thought
aka Linguist Musician Aka
Emmanuel JV Hernandez

Yea i was born into a wicked world
Where all the boys n girls
Was caught up in a prejudice swirl
White to black to mexican to asian
They want us to hate each other
Thats why i take a blunt n im blazin'
Phasin'
Out all the *******
Im sendin' hell to those reigning
In the pulpits
Heavenly sent
But i see all the demons schemin'
Abortions clinics in ghetto double teamin'
Who will bare the cries of the little *****?
But im daydreamin'
Naw i stay in pain
try my hardst not to use the Lord name in vain
******* is apart of the game
homie pass me the flame
so i can torch you
naw **** that let me help you
but ya rather put a gat to my back
n see me die look me in myeye
im troubled man
passin' through times
arrested through petty crimes
now im dropping dimes
lawyers gettin' paid courts gettin' paid
n all i have is a little sunshine no shade
they cant fade me
Man child running wild
blast on ya know who?
Thats how?
I got my rep watch yo step as Iprep
For battle
Shake off the snakes
I gotta continue to rise
Str8 thuggin' til the day i diessss....


Stuck in a arrested development
The government
Still suckin us through embezzlement
Irs aint never been apart
From.the start
Just check the chart uh
KING George still gettin' money
Even though he dead
They switch alias to get yo bread
They call the feds
If ya make ya own paper
Through illegal capers
Inhale my vapors
Maybe u can a contact
Sharp as a tact keep my brain stacked
With powerful intellects
My mind rejects
******* so i gotta semi select
Uh in my mind soi can retain my fame
These days they hustle you man
No ****
Americas a culprit
Blame my crew for ******' up ****
Since 92 the riots
Made them white racist quiet
Now its a new day and age
Media say we violent
But we aint the ones bustin' guns
Good die young the rich old
Not much time before i fild
Im tryna bring **** back to the sixties
When our black males was holdin'
Down the community n unity
We amongst each other
Only killin' we did was on a *******
That wasnt down for our color
We used to honor our mothers
Nowadays these *******
Blow they cover
Tattoos weaves fake plastic breast
To *****
To videos hos n little shows
She be pregnant as ****
Say she independent but she reallyy a **
Uh lets change the game
And rearrange this ****
But u too stupid
Shakim' ya ***** meat
This is life of scorned souls
Runnin- the streetZzz yeaaa *****

Hey baby, are you still up, I wanna tell something
There's this feeling, keep on coming, I wanna let go and stop pretending
You see, I love being around, with ya by my side
When we dine, then we roll and we ride
But I don't see the warmth of your smile no more
Not feelin same love I've been having before
I'm not sendin ya out of the door
It's just you're my star no more
When I'm all alone and you call on my phone
I answer it but am not talkin on my own
You see, I'm doing this for us not to get a lotta hurt
You a fine lady, I don't want ya to get hurt
I may love you, that's why I want you to have the best
That's not me, I'm just a guy like the rest
Not as rich as bill, Not as pretty like Apollo
I don't wear a suit, just an old sweaty polo

I don't see us living together tomorrow
I wanna see you happy though even if it'll bring me sorrow
To break ya heart is not my intention
To let ya go is a **** hard decision
You're a **** good girl, that's hard to forget
Leavin ya is the ****, i will soon regret
But honey, it's not workin out, I know you know it
I'm not happy no more, I hope you saw it
You've taught me how to love and how to show it
Hope I made ya happy for never again will I do it
Baby girl, forgive me for what I'm doin
Ain't doin' this for nothin', you'll know tomorrow morning
And I don't want to say goodbye, Don't want any tears from ya eye
Never again will you cry, Just think that the blame is all mine
This is a tough time for me, ***
Forgive me for what I've done

Tomorrow morning, you won't see me lying in this bed
I'm going away, to somewhere high and quiet instead
Though I'll be leaving, don't go on believing
In ya mem'ry, In ya heart, Hope I'll be living.

“Take off your clothes.”

this is a ***** and devoted clan

“I’ll be there,” he said. “Early.”

he is slavery’s plantation overseer. of his medals
he cherishes one

A ***** BOY WHISTLED AT HER AND THEY KILLED HIM

the back of his home is a tool house. they turned south on Mississippi No. 1
there was no moon as they drove. there had been no denial
he’s tired o’ livin’, Chicago Boy, tired o’ sendin’ your kind down here
don’t disapprove enough of them. resist the revolt of colored men
they turned south on Mississippi No. 1. they filled him so full of poison
that he was hopeless

“I’m not afraid of you.”

they included sons, grandsons and a nephew of Moses. his body bears
multiple shrapnel wounds. close range killing “he ain’t got good sense”
nobody was holding him. he was as tough as they were
hypocrisy exposed; myth dispelled
for the first time – the story no jury heard
he looked like a man, Chicago Boy
this is the sum of the facts

A ***** “CHILD” WHISTLED AT HER AND THEY KILLED HIM

he had heard of the trouble. he wanted to go home
dark-visaged, talkin’ mighty big. he staggered under its weight…
dark-visaged, he stood there naked. carried it to the river bank
stand him up there on that bluff. mark him for a coward and a fool
here are the facts
just whip him, Brother, if that won’t scare Chicago Boy
it was Sunday morning, a little before seven.
here, for the first time, I’ll pay you for the damages
they tried dirt and gravel roads, drove along the levee
here for the first time, I didn’t think they’d **** a boy
if that won’t scare Chicago Boy, hell won’t

“You still as good as I am?”

for three hours that morning, there was a fire
I’ll blow your head off, Chicago Boy
pistol whipping bruises more than it cuts
Chicago Boy, Chicago Boy
I’m no bully, Chicago Boy
Brother, whip him, shine the light on down
Brother, the Big River bends around.
the real answer is the remarkable part

“I’m as good as you are.”

seventy-two hours later – eight miles downstream
the half in their fraternity was forgotten.

I once had a dream,
Turned into a nightmare
Thought I was livin’,
Found out I had died.
Heard all of the jokes,
But I just kept laughin’,
Told a couple myself,
And somebody cried.

World keeps on turnin’,
We keep getting’ older,
Mirrors and reflections,
Are foggy today.
All of our children
Are livin’ their own lives,
Sendin’ us emails,
“Hope you’re doin’ OK.”

I know that they mean well,
I did much the same,
Life’s movin’ faster
It’s a young person’s game.
Pushing the edges, and
Paintin’ new pictures
No room for old folks,
Nobody’s to blame.

Friend me on Facebook,
Post pictures of grandkids
I’ll know what you’re doing,
I’ll know where you are.
Enjoy all the hours
You have with your children
Your chips earned as parents
Only get you so far.
PwL 4/15/06

One here's come to the two
To the muthaphukkin three
Gangsta in me far from empty
I stay on fool quick to serve
All adversaries with tool
After I smoke you
Dump on you just like trump
Bankruptcy part two
From begin to end
I'm in it to win break all the shells
From fake *** storey tells enticing he'll
Got homies in the joint laughing well
Black and Latino nation soon to rebel
If a million stand tall
How can they put us all in jail
So I'll cast the spelling pen
Makin a G putting my nuts on ya chin yeah


Ya couldn't shoot at me
And not expect a come back
Fool I'm from the hard hood
So I bomb like Bagdad
Run for cover
Cuz Yosef kills like no other
Stuck up in a daze yea I'm in a maze
Feelin good cuz made a pay day with an ak
Like dilinger gun slinger don't call me ******
My images is bigger bigger
Like the sound of my trigger
Hates never loved us
***** wanna **** us
Can't believe in emotions cuz they hard to trust rusty me
Naw never thAt I just wanna see ya back tore up from my Mack
Eleven sendin souls to heaven
We can't talk *****
Not talking bout Tevin
So this is ya end send ya prayers
Cuz ya still gonna bend
With muthaphukkin nutz on ya chin

No more chillin,

Just sweatin, I’m stressin

I’m rainin down blood from my eyes

Gotta be the best, Superior to the rest

I only wanna touch the skies

I’m bettin high stakes, make no mistake

On eggshells walkin through these land mines

I gotta be strong if I’m gonna prove him wrong

His looks alone pierce my heart like dull knives

I gotta change my ways to see different days

There’s more to me than just some good times

I never hurt so much til he walked in

But best believe he’s sendin me good vibes

There’s depth to his stares, he actually cares

My past lovers from himself he divides

He’s only givin tough love, no baby gloves

This aint a phase, he’s really changin both our lives

He told me passion is only a distraction

Who cares about your heart or the size

Results and achievments are what they want

But these are just a few words for the wise

Now I’m livin in better days, true to my new ways

I’ve released all these bindes and cut these ties

Now I’m just chillin,

No more sweatin, no stressin

I’m not goin back, no compramise.

The last of six children
You made your way late
Through the humdrum of life
In the Volunteer state
Strapped to the hollows
Where your daddy and kin
Pulled coal from the mountains
And mine shafts within

The hum of the smokestacks
And the fog of the earth
Wore at your senses
And questioned your worth
While the cracks in the family
Like the cracks in the hills
Were as easy to slip through
As fortune’s goodwill

So you took to the bottle
And you took to the boys
With a thirst for the throttle
And the late barroom noise
While your mama and daddy
Sat at home by the phone
Sendin’ prayers for their youngest
Toward the gold plated throne

The folks down in Loudon
Remember too well
The night you rolled through
In your dust caked Chevelle
And the way it spun out
On a stray slab of ore
And careened down the *****
For the cold valley floor

The dirt in those hills
Never merited much
Beyond the black rock
Buried deep in its clutch
But the same soul that sprawled
Beside granddaddy’s grave
Was the same soul consumed
By the soil that day

When the April rains whisper
Their song to the pines
And the distant train whistles
Its lonesome steel whine
Deep in the thunder
Behind the grey hue
Your memory glistens
Like the late morning dew

The last of six children
You made your way late
Through the humdrum of life
In the Volunteer state
Pining for something
Your voice could not name
A dream and a dreamer
Too restless to tame

chiggety check my flizzow
its me yosef comin back for more war and gore
makin mics sore
once i soar on the mic
turn these hard rhymers into dikes like mike
everybody wanna be like me
six rings n pending put an ending
last second shot ya know ya got got
one eight seven on the cops
cuz ya see death knocks
unexpectedly thats how its supposed to be
wisdom in the streets crooked i
no need to lie
sendin haters to the sky
dt ask.why?
what happened once i tell em
them i stuck em buck buck em
**** em
throw em.up the river
souls quiver when i deliver
rhymes like mail no stamp
or postage kick up the mostest dopest
boys hope yosef is
on a downfall but still i ball
creep n crawl like eazy in the six tre **** what yall gotta say
i got propz from 3rd coast to the LA much luv to the bay
o yea im coming crazier than sling blade
haters get sprayed like raid
to the tombs ya go where body becomes fade and yeaa it don't stopp



uh while you flyin' with witches
im ******' ******* with multiple riches
even ya girl got her pearls tongue wrapped aroubd my hung
dickkkk stickin' yo chick
after i nut in her
i drop her *** like a cheap brick i stick
hoes like i stick my flows
nothing but that raw ****
that hits so hard make even the dead raise from casket
tisket a tasket
i got heads in a basket
crazy insane in the membrane
i told ya ***** im a four time veteran i can dance in the water and not get wet
can ya dig it
i aint talkin friends of distinction
im tryna put mcs into extinction
my rhymes be penchin'
nerves with the verbs that curbs
make reservoirs
at dry spots liver than liverachi
cook up lyrics like a japenese habachi sound the banchees
dont ya know jalel death comes in three
****** you and whole wack rappi. family
yall cant handle me
im slick as rick check the tock to a tick
times running out no doubt
got ya sweatin' as the water tricklin'
down ya check yosef eradicates weak
so no need to speak
uh my flows detrimental every time i lay my **** in an instrumental
learn to rhyme learn to spell
***** ****** always wanna yell
out loud but once i puff my cloud
i pop guns make ya soul run
as ya lay in a casket uncovered the shroud
yea and it dont stopp
cuz its 187 on a muthpahukkin flop

Her I sit, just trying to write
Applying to jobs like that’s my life’s plight

To pave right ahead, don’t think till I’m dead

Grows heavy feelings in fingers like lead


What feels not genuine in things I’m sendin them?

I try and be real yet I see I pretend again

Again and again, deceits all I’m lendin them

Breath nice and slow and try an begin again

Again and again, nothings been mended friend


Take what you’ve got and take what you’ve done

Throw all that on paper, compressed into one
Page

One single page

My resume

What does it say of me?

Dry tidbits of years and hours that came from me

Once it was sang from me

Once pulsed and rang from me

Like torrents of heart, blood, and tears

It all drained from me

Left out in the sun, some dry shrinking things

The future will come
Let it bring what it brings

Hate man, it soaks to the bone,
leaves you eatin' animosity, every night, alone.
And I know, it can be an easy thing to harbor
but brother understand, it only makes the heart harder.
A slow burn, just like the end of a cigarette,
sometimes it's easier to cling than it is to forget.
That's why I highly advise you breathe easy,
cruise on through it like fluid, smooth in movement.
And my brother please let your wrath fly freely,
Never aim it like a gun waitin' for you to **** and shoot it.
I recognize, life leaves you searchin' for answers you can't find,
,but it's better to let go than to poison your own mind.
I hope you listen to this message I'm sendin'
and try to get a grasp on the lesson I'm stressin'.

Sup old man, my gold plan
was to be better than you
but as time passes by
I realize I was already
greater than you, Elevated & true.
I restate it in blue. While this
ink pen leaks, I am painted as truth
20 years you laid down
behind a cell, sendin mail
I call tell, emotions from a stranger
that knew he failed as a father.
I didn't bother to write back
to see you in person now
a free man, how can I fight that
I'm happy but I dont know you
just your legacy. Another lost black king
so me, I'll never be.