Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
JM Romig Apr 2016
Afterward,
I asked “Where to?”
“The beach?” She replied
“Too cold.” I said.
“Fine, whatever. Take me home, I guess.”
She’s too much like you.

Even now, ten years later,
she still swims in my old hoodie.
The pink and blue butterflies on her fingernails
barely escape the sleeves.

We’re sitting in the sand
she is looking at the water
as if searching for something far out in the distance.

Remember when we babysat
all those years ago?
She stole my hoodie
called it her “Cloak of Invincibility”.
She meant Invisibility,
we were watching Harry Potter.
Today, I wish it were the former.

“Are you going to tell my mom?” She asked.
“No.” I said “But you should.”
I wanted to tell her about what happened in ‘92
about her mother’s battle with depression
after a similar thing happened with her
but that’s your sister’s story to tell
so I did what you always say I should
and let the quiet between us be.

I watched the waves roll in
and crash against the shore.
I noticed heavy grey clouds heading toward us
“It’s going to rain” I said
“Let it.” she replied, with a calm acceptance.

She’s grown up so much
since the cancer took you from us.
You wouldn’t even recognize her.

She looks nothing like her mother
Or her father, for that matter
She looks
…well, she looks like you.
The spitting image.

“Why the beach?” I asked
after a long while of listening to the waves.
“This is where it happened.”
I felt an anger rise up through me
and I was already clenching my fists
before I realized there was no direction
for that aggression to go.

I took a deep belly breath,
and refocused.

“Why come back here?”
“to see if it felt different.”
“Does it?”
“…a little.”
More silence.

I watched her writing things in the sand
with a broken stick she found
and then pushing her palm across the words,
wiping the letters into each other,
cleaning the slate,
and again, writing in the sand.

“You know…” She said, finally,
“I was thinking for a while,
about keeping it.
if I had,
if it were a girl,
I would have named it after her."
she didn't have to say your name out loud
for me to know
“I miss her,” she added

"Me too".
The waves kept hitting the shore
and eventually, the rain came.

I drove her home,
she offered to give back my hoodie
“Keep it.” I said, smiling
she shrugged and took it with her.

On the way home,
I drove passed our old house
the new owners are letting the grass grow
too long for my taste.
It seems everything has been growing in your absence.
Except me.
When I wake up.
In the early songs of birds
And the rest of the world.
I fight for the release of my body.
From the warmth and sanctity of my bed.

It would be so much easier.
To stay there.
Dealing with dreams and light.
But I move. And I step out of my post-nocturne cocoon.
Shedding my nightly shell,
To take the form of a sac of air and water, with a few bones holding me together.

Joints bending, stretching follows suit after refocused eyes.
I hold my breath, counting the seconds, the hours, the day.
Hobbling through each measurement on my brittle bones.
Hoping on the times when I can lay back down and rest.

Repeat.

This pain gnaws at my frail spirit.
Waiting for the final breath to escape.
But in one final effort, my mind takes shape.
Pushing against the confines of routine.
The measurements split.
My dreams unfurl.
And I step out of sleep.

Wings outstretched.
So come everybody throw ya hands
In the air for me
If y'all feelin this jubilee


O yea so lets get back to the actions
Satisfaction
Of celebrities got ya main attraction
No actin I'm packing
Gats to baseball bats and who dat?
Call me poetry wack splat
Goes through ya back bullet hole
Filljn those
Empty spots ya can't touc what's hot
I got reps like birdie
Above the rim lace blunt with traces
Of v slims
Who can stop me if my potency
Is near infinite
I'm embedded in ya melon eternally
Too cool for y'all to see I be
With this jubilee a juvenile
Born in the wild never smiled as child
All I wanted was a few toys from micky ds
Could barely afford cheese
Make tracks sneeze when I breath
Got thick chicks from here all the way to Belize
Please don't be ignorant
Just throw ya hands up to this anthem
Ya can't phantom
The jubilee is slammin-
Come on



Not that the time is right
Refocused my sight the black knight
Knocking outsights now ya braille as **** for trynA **** with
The m o b s t e r ghetto star
All hands on the r
Ruger luger quick to shoot ya scoop ya
Out of the scene like ice cream
One man team
Don't need a **** near friend in need
Please believe
I got backups like traffic
Hit the skins is automatic cuz static
To radio station they hate me
Cuz I don't participate in *******
I'm concerned with
These ***** *** punks running politics
Donald Trump I gotta automatic thAt loves to dump
Throw his *** in the trunk
Puff skunks I'm slammin on the gas
Like an alley oopp dunk full of *****
Dikes to lesbians all want a piece of me
I ain't cocky but stocky like Rocky
Picket pock me ill find thee
Restin peace to my enemies
That couldn't get to me
I'm hater proof so y'all just throw ya hands in the air for me
And represent this jubilee ahh. Come on
Daniel Regan Feb 2012
Old memories preserved in black and white.
Reminisce of a time less contrite.
Seen through the lens of those without strife.
Young and free with a passion for life.
Replaced by wisdom, fear and guilt.
For the life one has methodically built.
With walls and doors, and windows to see.
As the world passes by this absentee.
Surrounded by frames of the finest wood.
Of snapshots of the potential that someday could.
Climb the mountains unreached by the hands of our time.
Instead stuck walking for fear of the climb.
For fear of the fall and all it might bring.
Fear of the inability to rebuild his wings.
Compliant with gravity, compliant with normality.
Unfamiliar with the rebellion that once filled his soul.
Defining his life where their now is a hole.
Replaced by a scar and filled with his tears.
As the joys of his childhood continue to disappear.
Chased away by the light of reality.
Youthful dreams replaced in actuality.
Ambitions refocused towards sensuality.
Mind made up of generalities.
Soul defined in spirituality.
As his life moves slowly into irrationality.
And though the colors here are always bright.
They are most vulnerable in the absent of light.
Replaced by the darkness and a mind numbing truth.
One we all have forgotten from our youth.
That the potential of life knows no bounds.
And that which we can create will always astound.
Those who come after us and those who continue to follow.
Will continue to fill our world as if it was hollow.
In need of filling with that which they create.
Building from our ashes on a brand new slate.
Their artistry challenged only by those.
Who have left footprints in the sand with their bare toes.
So which life do you wish to live.
One of solitude or one where you continue to give.
Give your time, give your energy, give your heart and your soul.
To the child in you whom you continue to out grow.
Continue to neglect who’s dreams have yet to be filled.
By the world you once dreamed of with those Legos you use to build.
Dreams filled with sky scrapers all in black and white.
Only to be interrupted by mornings first light.
Life’s colors seeping in as they begin to fill your days.
Your youthful ambitions still here in many ways.
Still clinging to you through those memories of yesteryear.
Captured in your childish smile radiating so clear.
Teresa Grace Sep 2012
Trapped in silence
Unconscious face
Hopeful lost
Dreams speak
Power replies
Physical doll
Intention revives
Silence is thought.

Revision without result
Three days without rising
Purpose refocused
Locked sustained energy
Achievement unleashed
Confidence gained
Consciousness stable
Rewards on the table
ghost queen Jul 2020
Séraphine, Vignette nº 7, Le Cercueil

I was on the phone talking to the museum. Ground-penetrating radar had found what looked like a coffin at the Lutetian layer, and they were in the process of digging down to it. I was telling Sylvain to use the new 4K video cameras to record every detail when the doorbell rang. I’d left the door ajar, knowing Madame Pinard, the concierge was bringing by an adjuster to inspect and cut a check for the repair of the leak in the ceiling that had washed away chunks of plaster, now laying on the hardwood floor in the bedroom, exposing the wooden rafters of the attic.

“May we come in Monsieur,” she shouted from down the hall in the foyer. “Yes, Madame, please come in,” I shouted back, with more exasperation in my voice than I wanted to express. “I am on the phone with the musee Madame, please show him to the bedroom.”

I saw Madame and the adjuster come in out of the corner of my eye and turned my head to see them as they walked the stairs to the bedrooms. The adjuster was not a man, but a woman, which was surprising in France. The first thing I noticed about her, was her wide round birthing hips, what the kids, called thick. She wore a long-sleeve white silk blouse, black pencil skirt, and the traditional, obligatory Parisian back seamed stockings. I didn’t make out her face but caught sight of her red hair tied in a tight bun on the back of her head, and the milky white skin of her neck.

“Damien, are you listening,” said Sylvain, the dig manager on the other end of the line. “Yes, I replied, “l was distracted by my landlady bringing an adjuster into the apartment. Yes, I’ll come down as soon as they leave.”

After a few minutes, Madame and the adjuster came back down. The adjuster walked into the foyer to wait. Madame came into the living room and said she’d have a crew out tomorrow to start repairs. As madame turned and walked down the hall, I got a better look at the adjuster. She was pure Celt, with red hair, white skin, dark brown doe eyes that looked black, high cheekbones, and the sharp straight nose of a Greek statute.

Besides her stunning beauty, I noticed her necklace, a traditional golden Celtic torc, which signified the wearer as a person of high rank. I’d never seen a person wearing one. I’d only seen one on a statue, The Dying Gaul in Le Louvres. How so very interesting I thought to myself.  

As she was talking to Madame and turning to leave, she made eye contact. She tilted in acknowledgment and goodbye. I nodded back and she was gone. I wished I could have gotten a chance to talk to her, maybe even ask her for an aperitif at the corner bistro. Oh well, c’est la vie.

-------

I went to the dig at the La Crypt at 12:30-ish talked to Sylvain for a bit and went down to the lower levels to see it for myself. The area was gridded out and several cameras on tripods were recording. The team was within centimeters front the top, and so put down their trowels and used a high-pressure water and suction hoses to remove the rest of the topsoil. The top came into view, the excess water was ****** away. Sponges were used to clear and clean away the mud.

The stone was obviously Lutetian limestone, finely sanded and polished. The lid was craved, which first glance, looked like Norse runes and one Celtic knot. “Take pics and send them to religious studies,” I said half to myself, half to Sylvain. How strange to have Norse and Celt iconography together I thought to myself.

It was late when I exited the metro station. The air was bitterly cold, my breath appearing and disappearing around me like a mystic cloud.

I was tired, exhausted from digging, and was seeing things in the corner of my eye that I chalked up to aberrations of a fatigued mind. That is until I walked past the Boise de Boulogne. In a dark recess, along the tree line, I saw what looked like a faintly glowing woman in a white dress. My first reaction was horror, remembering all the monster movies I’d seen as a child. Then quickly, my adult mind kicked in and rationalized it away as an artsy late night photography session, which is common around Paris. The sting of the cold refocused my attention and I hurriedly resumed my walk home.

I was tired, muddy, and had to take a shower before throwing myself into bed. I showered, dried off, and pulled back the new, thick duvet I’d bought for winter. The moon was full, beaming softly, barely illuminating the dark bedroom, as I cracked opened a window to let a small amount of fresh cold air into the humid stale room.

I slid under the duvet. I liked the cold, it reminded me of camping in the mountains with my old man and being snug in our down sleeping bags as we talked half the night away. I quickly fell asleep.

I half awoke, sensing a presence. I opened my eyes and saw a woman, ****, standing at the end of my bed, enveloped in a faint blue luminescence. She looked at me with big doe eyes. I watched her watching me, trying to figure out if I was dreaming or not.

She crawled on to the bed. I couldn’t feel her as she made her up the bed. She straddled me. I saw glint around her neck and saw she was wearing a torc, and realized who she was.

Her face was centimeters from mine. Her eyes burned with ferocity, intensity, and anger. I looked back up at her, fear welling up inside of me. She looked down at me. Her penetrating eyes, looking into my soul. I could feel her in my head, my mind.

She felt my fear, and without a word, just the look in her eyes, reassured me, calmed me, and my body and mind relaxed as if a nurse had given me a shot of morphine.

She touched her lips to mine, and felt the heat of her beath, smelled her dewy scent. I didn’t move. I knew I was prey. I knew what she wanted, and let her take it.

She slid her tongue into my mouth, and I gently ****** on it. She ****** up my lower lip, biting it playfully. She tasted sweet, fresh, like spring water. I couldn’t get enough of her. I wanted more. I kissed her harder, deeper, and felt myself slide to the edge of sleep, no longer sure what was a dream, or what was real.

She pulled back the duvet, grabbed my ****, and stroked it till it was painfully hard. She kissed it, put it in her mouth, and ****** it. Her head bobbing up and down. She’d stop, bite the head, and use her teeth to scrape up and down the shaft till I winched and yelled out in pain.

I started to moan, my body tightening, and arched, thrusting deeper into her mouth, coming as she raked her nails hard down the side of my chest. To my surprise, she didn’t spit out but swallowed my ***, licking excess from around her lips.

--------

I opened my eyes and was blinded by sunlight streaming in through the open windows and curtains. What the ****, I thought to myself, I never sleep this late. It was always dark when I wake. And the birds, chirping in the trees outside my window, were loud, and grating on my nerves.  

I slowly got out of bed. My body ached, my lower lip hurt, and my **** was sore. I grabbed my **** and immediately released it in pain. It was raw as if I’d had ***. I was definitely confused. My eyes darted from side to side as I tried to make sense and remember last night. I left the dig, came home, showered, and went to bed.

I trudged to the kitchen and made coffee, all the while, racking my brain for some clue as to why I felt like ****. I poured a cup, leaned back on the counter, and sip the coffee. I shook my head, placing my hand on my hip, and felt a sharp burning. I looked down and saw blood on my hand and side. I went to the bathroom mirror and saw fingernail marks down both sides of my chest. I just stared.

I had no idea, no clues as to how these happened. I jumped into the shower and washed off, bandaged up the bleeding scratches with paper towels and tape, dressed, and went to the cafe at the corner.

Despite the cold, I sat on the terrace, ordered coffee, bread, butter, and jam. I looked at my phone. It was 8:08. I looked at my text messages and emails for some clue as to what happened last night.

Breakfast came, and I sipped the coffee, staring out into the street. The waiter walked past me. “Oui madame, what would you like this morning,” he said. “Cafe et croissant,” she said. The waiter turned and walked back inside. I turned my head to the side for a quick look and blinked twice. It was the redheaded adjuster from yesterday.

“Bonjour M. Delacroix,” she said. “Bonjour Madame,” I instinctively replied. There was an awkward pause.  “I am Brigitte, Brigitte Dieudonné,” she said softly.

We small talked over breakfast and when I tab came, paid, and said, “I headed to the office.” “It is the weekend monsieur. “Yes,” I replied, “I work at an archeological dig on Ile de la Cite. The crypte.” “I am headed that way myself, do you mind if I walk with you,” she asked.

We walked to the metro station, down the stairs, through the turnstile, and onto the quay. The train came, the doors hissed open, and we strode in. The train was full of Chinese tourists and it was standing room only. I grab a pole and Brigitte did the same as she squeezed up beside me.

The train jolted forward and Brigitte bumped into me. As the train smoothed out, she kept leaning into me. Her derriere in my crouch. I could feel her body through her coat. I was getting turned on. As the trained curved around a curve, it rocked back and forth. Her *** bumping and grinding against my now hard ****. Could she feel my hard-on through the coats? She half-turned her head a gave me a coquettish smile. She knew I thought to myself.

We exited La Cité metro station, on to Place Louis Lépine. Before I could say anything, she said she’d like to see the dig. “Sure,” I said, and we walked to the La Crypt. We walked down the stairs to glass doors and pass the touristy exhibits and displays, to the back, behind the green painted plywood wall. Sylvain and several grad students were standing over and around the coffin. Two of them were in the pit setting up a portable x-ray machine, one with a still camera, another with a video camcorder, and the rest looking down at their tablets.

Brigitte and I walked to the edge. The coffin’s lid had been clean. The runes and Celtic knot were clearly visible. “Danger, death, mother,” Brigitte said. Sylvain turned his head, and said, “she is right, danger, death, mother according to the religious studies guys.” “How do you know that,” I asked. “It’s in all the teenage vampire movies,” she replied grinning.

“The top one is an inverse Thurisaz, which is means danger. The second one is an inverse Algiz, which means death. The knot is Celtic for mother, and the dot in the heart means she had one daughter,” Brigitte said trailing off.

“It looks you’ve got it under control Sylvain. I have an appointment. Brigitte can I walk you back to la place,” I said.

We walked to la place and stopped at the metro entrance. “Can I have your number,” I asked? “Yes, you may, if you promise to call monsieur Delacroix,” she said smiling girlishly. She took my phone from my hand and typed in her number and dialed. Her phone rang. “I have your monsieur, Delacroix. A bientot,” she said. We did la bise and she was off.
*******!
I yelled to the past
how could you do this to us?
then I read your history
dismantled your genocidal machine
refocused on my breathing
scolding past
rexamining the present
recreating the past
provoking the future
Evie Hammond Jan 2016
Despair, mother, father of emotion
A raw intensity, a singularity
Exploding outwards, expanding into
Every pastel sentiment
Love's antimatter
Doppelganger
Evil twin, yin yang
Just as love lace edged with despair
Despair runs threaded through with love
Like seaside rock once the season's dead and gone
Whispered ghosts of dreams
Of sunny days and might have beens
Gone all too soon
Of childhood summer memories
Simple pleasures at the time
Refocused under a lens of grief
Once bringing joy
Now heralds pain so exquisite
All other feelings rendered pale
Translucent echoes when compared
And with such brilliant intensity
Informs that you are still alive
Ironically
At least for now
My dad called me. His doctor told him he has a cancer in his lung. This is our poem
Meagan Castro Apr 2013
Morbidity is the recognition that the rollercoaster will end,
Death is the bright Exit light foe or friend.
Some look to it as an escape when running,
But what monster and issues have you gunning.
Moving towards the unknown with different speed,
Why do we ponder it as a choice?
Suffering, and pains guide voice.
A train into the unknown,
No room for belongings and all the known.
Memories left behind,
I hope the transition is kind.
I do not know if I am at peace with parting,
I feel that the real me is present and my life is just starting,
I once took this life for granted,
Looked for an exit and peered in.
Only to slam it shut and crumble down,
Down into a pile of mush,
I was broken diminished and needed an internal push.
I now see this life through a new lens,
No longer tarnished and scratched, refocused and bright eyed.
I am now a better me than I was before,
And will continue to grow until I pass through the door.
Paul Stevens Apr 2015
A drop of rain splashes onto his cheek, it is brushed away as the others had been, it had been almost three hours but still he waited, casting his eyes around the vista in front of him, refocusing his gaze through the telescopic sight and along the now wet steel of the rifles barrel, blue-black in the tiny gaps between the camowrap which merged with the foliage of his cached viewpoint, as the crosshairs snapped into clarity, He felt comfortable that he was well hidden from prying eyes, waiting was almost a meditation to him over the months he had been tasked with this duty he had grown to love the solitude it was a time to reflect, a time to listen to the birds and insects as he waited like a wild cat moving very little, almost  still and at the same time his mind concentrated on the target, the rain was getting heavier now although he had picked this spot at the base of a large plane tree, sheltered from the weather under the spreading crown of well-leaved branches, long bull grass directly in front of him he was warm and well protected by the elements with only a few drops of rain falling annoyingly on his cheek...,

He was a long way from the constant 28 degrees celsius and sunny days of his homeland  and his lovely Angela, how he missed her infectious laugh and freely given affection..".shake yourself up man you need to think of the job, you're not here to be emotional ! "

He blinked and refocused as he opened his eyes and stared through the cross hairs he saw a shadow shape change, a movement, he took a deep breath and flicked off the safety catch, gently squeezed the trigger and held it almost like the clutch on a European Manual car engaged in a hill start, two camo-clad figures emerged armed with assault rifles, (check - AK47 not accurate over this range - no immediate danger. ) Then he saw his target - a man in his fifties, long flowing silvery white hair slim build, dressed in black, this time looking like a special ops crew member without the training, ' thwack thwack ' one  bullet in the body and one in the head, his target was down even before his bodyguards had realised, beads of sweat formed on his brow as he buried himself deeper into the ground, keeping just one eye on the target zone, counting mentally and trying to keep his heart beat as slow as possible, he waited for the bodyguards to choose a route towards him, 17 seconds after the shooting "what were they waiting for?" At last they broke off in differing directions leaving a way through for him to get to his extraction point, deftly he dismantled his ****** rifle with controlled actions practiced time and time again -automatic now! 21 seconds he moved away stealthy stealing the space around the trees, a shadow in the depths of shadow melting into the undergrowth, he hears shouting and confused conversation.

In his new hiding place now waiting, completely merged into the darkness unseeable by the untrained eye, wait he must as he presses the button on his wristwatch to activate his extraction beacon it is now 43 seconds after the target had been eliminated !
Later sitting on the nearest seat to the open door of the Seahawk 27 minutes after the last shot -all in a day's work soon he would be on the deck of the aircraft carrier at anchor in the gulf of Aqaba, the debrief done and then home to his lovely Angela.

But until then he needed to ride the storm of palpitations, sweats and waves of anxiety and the deep dark mind that always accompanied a '****'..
More of an observation
Spike Harper Jan 2016
I chose.
And still choose.
Where my next step will land
Or fall..
                                                          ­            Asunder
Torn                        
                                                                ­Eviscerated
Stiched.

With the same tools.
Of the same hand.
Of two minds.
Of canvas like attributes.
....
I will be strong.
You will be quiet.
I will drag us back through hell.
You will listen.
I. Am.

Wholely tainted.
With views askew.
While I truly never knew.
When these eyes switched and feinted

Took the wheel.
Battered the interior and exterior.
Threw away all in his reach to feel.
Berating and beating i the inferior.
.
..
...
And now
With eyes of black and brown.
Do they see.
Witness
Hole.
Whole.
A future.
Distant and cloudy.
But right.
There.
This well only knew the depths of dry darkness.
Yet a fountain springs fourth.
For the sun never felt so warm.
Filling my being.
Eyes refocused.
The black gate still lie somewhere beyond.
We nod to each other.
This journey.
This quest.
This.
Isn't.
Over.
Accept who you are. No use fighting yourselves with an opponent in the distance.
Makiya Dec 2011
yesterday I spoke to the moon.

after a time, with the distance and all
I hardly expected an answer but when
I felt her sigh, I knew she had heard me so I
climbed to the top of a nearby car and
asked her if she could, please,
repeat that.

she hadn't been spoken to in so long, she confided,
she had grown ancient and old and she felt we no longer
spoke her language and
we no longer cared to.

she spoke for a long while, I felt her growing closer and the gap between us
closing. I felt a calm like the calm you feel at sea, and the
calm you feel in the warmth of another person.

if I reached my hands up I could touch surface and
feel her old majesty.

humbled, I asked if once more she could dust the earth with her wind
and kiss my skin, but before she could answer
a car horn ripped the sound waves open and left them
gagging.

as I refocused, my moon seemed as far away as ever
and I folded myself into my coat and went
on my way, disheartened,
to say the least.

it wasn't until, glooming the night away on my couch,  the 11 o'clock news said
that strange and powerful winds were sweeping the nation,
then I knew
my moon
had heard me.
Saint Ozz Apr 2014
Welcome the perpetually distracted
Fixated on a higher order so reality
Can fade to the background
Focus refocused reduced and qualified
They stand in line their micronized
Attentions satiated by the glowing orbs
They adore.
Modern culture we have all been behind these people at Starbucks...
Trupoetry Apr 2016
& Suddenly there was a shift
her beauty lit up the room
She created more space for her gift
issuing an eviction notice to gloom

what she thought was dead
Had been surely ressurected
no matter how much or how little was said
You could find her unaffected

Her attention now directed
Centered & refocused
& they all felt it
Joy; where she was once hopeless

a light began to shine
A brave moment a midst a hearts strife
it was far beyond time
To become the love of her own life <3 xoxo
Love always; in all ways!
Paul Goring Apr 2013
Her reddened eyes
reopened
it seemed
like she had been crying
but she hadn’t
Not a tear
But for that moment
as she refocused
approaching awake again
It seemed like sadness
burdened her
had surrounded her sleep
sending phantoms  
to populate her dreams
A life form resembling our trees ,  filled with talismans , hanging precariously from an orchard as far as the human eye can see ! Dreams ? Brilliant gold colored entities ? Memories ? Silver comets , red orbs cast across the Universe ! Deep blue seas , chartreuse skies , mahogany colored diamond encrusted firmament with two bright red satellites ! Violet Dawns and lavender sunsets ! Bipedal winged , reptilian type inhabitants with vastly superior intellect , well above what we could ever possibly conceive ! The bastardization of human beings from first contact , low grade semi -intelligent life forms with very little to offer ! The equivalent of Apollo astronauts dumping out a bag of moon rocks ...Conversation with a cockroach ...Collected , analyzed , sent back to Earth post haste , tucked away in an alien file cabinet ! Uneventful . Refocused ..Yawning....Earth ! Enchanted ! Amazed ! Stupefied ...
Copyright October 25 , 2015 by Randolph L wilson * All Rights Reserved
I thought I heard a whisper
While sitting under that old tree,
I figured the voices in my head
Weren’t yet crying audibly,
Head tilted, I strained to hear
What could have brought me tension,
It’s empty for miles around, I thought,
No use to cause my dreams suspension,
And then as if it heard my fingers
Crunch tightly in a panicked fist,
I could still lie, but the question lingers,
Did I just speak with Hopelessness?
-
Redirection of internal infrastructure
Map prerequisites, destroy my composure,
Indulge me in lost ideas,
Forbidden in thought, in rhyme, in written reason,
Defy all logic, misanthropic,
Allow me this, my casket’s treason,
Anorexic, dire complexion,
Filters lost longing indiscretion,
Deep in memory, cranial protrusions,
Observed are scars with mass confusion,
Scribed as such, “we die alone here”
Naught but failing a life deserved here,
Articulate hemorrhaging of twisted tongues and feelings,
Allegory to bitter, pitiless healings,
Melancholic, leprositic
Between smoke-stained lungs
And liver scloritic,
Match a crusted, bloodstained outlook,
Upon a false-hoped, baited gut-hook,
With which carried out in gruesome fashion,
Can be borne by one in moral crashing
Ambiguous doubt of what comes next
Refocused and aimed at what is vexed,
At all, by one, failing to connect,
Sporadic in sense, theory ferments,
Stormy funeral, in full dawned dress,
A full circle marking total Hopelessness.
The heart skips, losing once
to many more then she adored
holding fast to who she loves
a supple and a gurgle she does make
falling away by the side,
she walks away as the morning breaks
healing dreams she once believed
never being a flawless being
her dying scream she doth make
a care she has no more to come
dreams so far away....

Walking in her head, that never was
one soul was born-darkened wish..
society souls, how dark the dish
the wicked game, refocused dreams
is there one, that is not stained?
a safe dream, finding them
the shadow to all concerns
a players Kiss to much loss
and so it begins and begins
with the blue dream of mine..

TILL the end of time....

Debbie Brooks 2014
Carl Webb II Jan 2019
bent over backward
to meet the requirements,
halo got caught in
afield, full of thorns.

was stranded, was folded,
with pressure,
was molded,
revealed and refocused,

a diamond of scorn.
Since God shedded his tears and flooded the atmosphere
My sins of my forefathers still here
I remember being one the tears
That fell down from the sky asking why
I was born to die and everyday I gotta stay high
I ain't choosin' sides committed to homicide
Deaths to foes who don't wanna ride
Soon to be under the ground like a tide
Water to ground strongest soldiers stomping around
What's thats sound? It's the Southside dumpin' on fools who wanna start somethin'
keep them heataz jumpin'
Now ya in a puddle of blood heart pumpin'
Trying not to crossover but I be the puttin' up the cross and you'll be over
The older and older
I get I realize life ain't about **** nothing but money pits and ***** ***** I love to stick never had a limp ****
So stay in your lane if you talking **** trick

My knuckle game somethin' insane with about a dime of piece of Mary Jane Straight to brain
Rolled up so I can swole up
My melanin got my thoughts shook like gelatin I make skeletons
Cross and bones if you interfere with the warfare zone
Huh my tactics are carefully selected from weapons thats soon to be ejected and injected
Into ya body like syringe ask the Lord why he had to die
No seconds left til my last breath
I'm heisting this game so I be the vengeful theft in the night
Refocused my sight third eye aligned now I'm takin' the blight despite
What my enemies think of me I'll remain a capital "G"
Ain't no fake in me much generosity to the military
Feel me ain't nothing to this life I'll die reckless
With a death angel around me as my necklace check it
So my time in life is respected
Back to the depths of Hell where many souls dwell well??
Diana Rop Jan 2019
For i am just a mix bag,
Of all the kinds of emotions, situations and circumstances
All the hurt, bitterness, regrets and hopelessness.
With this mess, i no longer hear my own voice
So,
I will sweep out every cutter
Untill i discover the success  and prosperity that lies within
I'll dig out all the dirt,
I'll dig untill i see the roots
For I am done hacking the leaves.
Untill i find  my inner true voice,
I'll do whatever it takes.
I'll keep digging
Untill  my thoughts are refocused on what is positive   and true...
Anais Vionet Oct 2020
You know what you want, get it. Make sure it responds to your needs - remote-control it, sub-routine it and on-demand it - wring it out.

But once you have it - something changes, doesn’t it? It loses some luster - it isn’t PERFECT, **** it. It wears out or becomes obsolete and the lust is reborn, refocused.

Do you want me? I think you want me - you seem to want to possess me - but do you actually want ME?

What if my DNA could be used to create a perfect, cloned replica - right down to the pheromones - a perfect doppelganger.

Only this - me-two - would be a commandable pleasure doll shipped, Amazon Prime - and perhaps made with a rich, warm polymer skin that wouldn’t age - wouldn’t that be even better? I think it would be better.

But forget about me - with THAT kind of technology. Think about the licensing fee Rudy Pankow could get, or gasp Chase Stokes! - ***!!! dancing around the room

yelling out “Mom!!, MomMMMMMM!!, I KNOW what I want for Christmas!!”
nothing is ever perfect - but it might be perfectly useable
Yo before I let my tape pops I'll let the beat drops
Fears for all of my hating peers shine a spear
Pierce the skies with my wisdom ties wise
Beyond my wonder years I'll die young and hung
Glory over fame same ol same sip champagne
Victory mane lion instincts suckas dont get a blink
From me only when my pistol needs company
Full force resurrection souls up for collection
No protection god the father made me peasant
Found pleasures pains treasured over measured
By society's pin point I stay with the sharpest anoint
Told yall I spark heads without meeting of a joint
Appoint by the spiritual supreme justice just as
Let the music blast til ya touches the cast everlast
Make ya hop around it's a show down underground  
But I tied to the rituals I'm mystical crack sell miracles
Huh yall fools ain't living it cristal I'm spilling it
Icy cup interrupt the corrupt the 6th jackson on a come up
Travel east of 99 you'll fine the great beast of all time
Standing in line with the kings and queens that shine
What's a light without no shine back no spine decline
My wills took the crossroads of Elijah miss the fire
My desire higher learning from thai burning turning
Ya braincells welcome to yosef hell where all fails
Melanins swell no fairytales survived Gods spell well
Cuz I learn the gospels of thomas yo tomorrows never promised
Born in this world as angel ***** then later turned into a demon
Got me plotting like a scheming triple teaming no fleeing
Souls capture from the eye of the rapture hurricane
Carter smarter what about the sons to the daughters
Humanity slaughter my triple 6 kiss all you ******* wishlist
A downplayed to uplay bring astray with no delays melees
Of the streets go unrest civil liberties put to an attest yes
I dont stress the ******* I rather use tools and ****
And I may not be like nas the don but I'm still a sun
Shining intellects with my lyrical text super threat cold inject
Bullets from heaters collect dont join deaths continuing sets
Cools as funzaerli wear pelle pelle girls keep they hands on my belly tryna feel me
See what's weighed below me ***** ya dont own me
Switch scenery mayne from harris to Paris dejavu crews
I blues Junior Walker Miles Davis Mingus black sinner ladies
It's crazy off the rip take a trip see how many beats I can rip!!!!







Oh yeah they thought I was done but I'm still a don
Referenced by the falling ones see tears in a gun
Sweating armageddon I ain't letting suckas betting
against my will I'll just chill til my soul feels
The moons minstrels cycle check the title rivals
Putting up numbers but in the end they catch slumbers
From gun runners can you feel pains happiness bliss
Lifes a ***** so it's hard to switch and break a glitch
Tricks are for kids that's why I refocused my bids
Twice the size of Solomon wives so check the beehives
Never played jive all the way live twins collars
Jachin and Boaz impalas blueprint dollars scholar
Of the ghetto cathedral eradicate the faces of evil
Different sigils drawn up mazes that frankie dazes
Living the golden time of phases still amazes me
Monk discipline see the bravery in my pen ship slavery
Master of the words vocals jumped on board as I hoard  
All of the souls out of control ice on my pinky rings clings
All the kitties in the ring sound the bell escape through jail
If all else fails I'll still prevail goetias tactics never fail
Sitting on the third rail forreal grinding shining
My candle amongst the dark see all visions get parked
Sparked from seeds of Noah I'll show you a boa
Constrict the perfect hits no **** we flip a grips
Not a blood or crip but I'll make crip from the blood  
Seaping body weaping weighting for the devils meeting
Paimon gave me many damiens but then again offers
Made from writing on the red rose pink candles parch papers
Escape the luscious vapors of reality yall fools killing me
Same hatred made before me see my CDs sitting nice
Welcome to the 5th rock from the sun wheres the sunshine
Dimensions intervention mxylsplk snaps ya to detention
Gain strength from minors I'm a true forty niners
Make ya feel like the death of Colchese when I release
I see a beast far from savage above the average havoc
Loves to see adversaries leech souls cant be breached
As I reach to a higher peak mc Everest never rest
As I cup the mic likes it's my baby dark scrilla catchin scabies
Ashly Kocher Jun 2018
In real life....
There is no hatred
There is no violence
There is no judgment
There is no anger
There is no loneliness
                          Love is love
Then I blink my eyes
Refocused the blurriness
But somehow this is
                       REAL LIFE....

Full of
   Hatred
      Violence
        Judgment
             Anger
                Loneliness.......
                Welcome to our world full of all these crazy acts called the real life....
Kurt Philip Behm Jul 2023
Time
divorces from memory
Moments
refocused sublime

Lost
in sequential detachment
Freeing the message
—unsigned  

(The New Room: June, 2023)
Mateuš Conrad Sep 2018
most people in the western world,
i presuppose, don't have this line
of argument,
and as mich as i'd love to argue for
either side of the propositions...
personally? i can't agree
to market either side's superiority...
say... i really prefer Indian
food to all the other cultures,
****, i have a kitchen with
a powerful array of Indian spices,
a pretty impressive arsenal...
and no... no one can fathom
the aesthetic of male
clinging toward a Turkish
barber...
   i don't care if a woman
cuts my hair and trims my beard...
the Turks are destined
perfectionist of, some would say,
a ******-riddle enterprise...
no matter...
i'll take a Turk to cut and trim my
beard over come English
**** fiddler...
         forget it,
a Turk comes prior to an English
******...
   the end.
    which brings me to the debate
concerning nationalism...
see... i'm stretched...
really, really stretched to mind both
sides of the debate...
i grew up in England,
in the multicultural La La Land...
i'm used to it,
but whenever i visit my grandparents
once or twice a year...
a nausea hits me...
   i wasn't born in either Warsaw
or Krakow...
   not many tourists visit my town...
a mix-raced child,
devil hell spawn of some Polish woman
and an African is like:
hell ping pong central
with the index finger...
     which brings to that "other" point...
you ever go back to
a monolithic...
****, wrong word...
   mono-.... mono-...
what's the correct word...
              ah! a homogenous society?
while the old outsiders
are a bunch of travelers at
the town's market on a Saturday,
speaking broken Polish?
     no, i guess the correct answer
is no...
     there's a nausea sensation,
you start feeling that every potential
romantic suitor is:
****** RED! ALERT!
   ******! like you're about
to **** your cousin or something...
i can't help but feed off this crap...
after all... the Polacks are
nomads no. 2, just shy of the Jews...
being nomads no. 1...
Boston to the Irish,
Chicago to the Polacks...
   but these people arguing
for nationalism,
an a homogenous population,
their monochromatic basis points
of argument...
they have been to places where
the collective minorities
are the majority?
  they have, right?
   all the small town rumor spreading,
the refocused attention
away from celebrity culture
and focusing on the friends,
and neighbors?
          i drink, my fault, my pleasure,
my vanity, my problem...
do you think the people
making their nationalistic
arguments, true, fair points...
could adapt to a homogenous society
so quickly and easily as
their arguments attaching
themselves to the vagueness
of the aether?
i'm neither pro nor con
either side of the argument...
   but having grown up in a society
with such a peacock rainbow of
Amazonian butterflies on show...
going back to a homogenous
society...
    it's gut-wrenching...
           it doesn't become
the revamped acquired norm within
a generation...
  impossible...
            like with interracial
marriages...
      the dominant genes disappear
in the third generation...
parents... no chance...
children... it's still there...
grandchildren... one side overpower the over...
great-grandchildren...
the freaks come out...
but i'm telling you...
if you've grown up in a hegemony
of cultures, races etc...
you'll find a homogenous
society...
     a bit dizzy...
a bit ****** riddled by superstition /
unhealthy bias on the basis
of the focus of an argument...

both sides are correct,
but both sides are also wrong,
personally,
going back,
and being a ****** among so many
other, Polacks?
    i start to imagine myself
as a faceless man,
a black hole event...
******* at a depth that's
without one.
John Prophet Jan 2021
Alteration.
At first,
subtle.
Subtle
alterations.
Tweaking.
Synaptic
changes.
Ou­tside.
Outside
influencing.
Refocused
sculpted
thinking.
Changes.­
Thinking
changes.
No going
back.
Technology
transforming.
Molding
synaptic
pathways.
D­ifferent.
Divergent
ways of
thinking.
Pace quickens.
Great divide.
Old vs new.
No going
back.
Old dies
slowly away.
New,
constantly
transforming.
Stability
lacking.
Structures­
cracking,
losing resonance.
Civilization
unrecognizable!
Al Sep 2020
A gesture in time I still hold alone.  Dignity is a vision refocused.  Look at this.  Just one small detail on a cufflink.  This lamp shines a light.  Illumination is a walk in wonder.  Upon the sidewalk they rest.  Invisible for the most part, and then her dream began.

Blue is the lagoon
within your eyes.

Outside the trashcan falls to the ground.  Can you hear the crash?  It's a cymbal sounding.  Love is the duster which polishes your soul.
Lost inside passion
with burning desire
Vision refocused
in tunnels of fire

Screams of delirium
christen the night
Darkness a metaphor
tainted delight

One then another
the virgins do fall
Lascivious demons
unleashed in the hall

Till daybreak approaches
new light on the way
The beast back in harness
—this evening to stray

(The New Room: January, 2024)
the black rose May 2019
theres still chaos in midst of the stillness.
a balance,
the bad mixed with good its
thrilling...
not knowing what to expect
& through it all
ill live on with no trace of regret.
each step brings me closer to the edge of possibility;
each time that i fall i am refocused on humility,
my agility,
my courage,
my ability to rise
becomes louder than my cries.
faith louder than my fears,
fill a river with my tears;
i embrace them
for they are not a sign of weakness.
only the strong survive,
no space amongst us for the weak.
less focus on the trials,
we dont recognize a worry.
to each its own,
to each a throne,
a space to re-write the story.
Bruce Levine Dec 2018
Empty laughter
Often fading
Among the trees
Of the nether-fold
Nirvana forsaken
Amidst the storm
Of the infinite
Paradoxical anagrams
Representing the
Vortex of time
Leaving in isolation
The magnitude
Unfulfilled
By a destiny removed
Renamed yet unknown
As a symbol
A metaphor
Held in an ironic
Twist of fate
Longing for the impossible
Parodies etched in paradiddles
Refocused without rhyme
Now forsaken
Amid the Pine Barrens
Of time

12/12/18
Tom Shields Jan 2021
Dig fingernails into palm
an aura of rage disquiets calm
teeth ground finely into dust
an era, an age broken chains of trust
breathing air freely, finally through a punctured lung
who are you that bites your thumb, saying I must bite my tongue?

Bide your time, for what is life if not time over reality
and reality if not perception over varied experiences
one balled fist, cherry-red knuckles, raised bottoms-up, always lowly
always knowing to go right to where the consensus of common sense is
steer the path of wrath, answer when the brass rings with theoretical equations in moral math
the shortest distance between two points is irrelevant when every minute of every day
is planned around the uphill struggle you have along the way

Ideas to further us,
wayside trinkets for those who follow
let the mad do battle with the angry until they turn murderous
they reside in the misery leftover of concrete; now mires of mud to wallow
admirers of survivors, secretly in love with a disaster whose burden laid on them here and now is not one anybody should be asked to master
you cannot prepare to lose everything, bunkers, guns, armor, nothing you have will make the pain pass faster
fate is an excuse abused by weak will and minds, they surrender the consequences of everything they do, that is done, to four letters

I have heard the worst and best moments of my life were fated
these notes, passed in sympathetic epitaphs from retired, retread hatred
the energy of the young man who would see this blue marble lost with all the rest
is refocused, as through a prism of detached and severed disinterest
I feel much older than I am, and like a sponge I absorb the colors and sights and sounds of the natural world around me
as I train my train of thought to stay on track, my wild emotions would wring me dry and misunderstood reactions would confound me

The virtue of solace just at arm's reach
never to fall too involved,
but to survive and inspire those to uplift, with an aligned love for each.
write
please read and enjoy

— The End —