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Paul Stevens Dec 2020
From the edges of enchanted brilliance, you enter even brighter shining in your glory, instantly I am drawn to your kindred spirit and I am at home once again

My already calm being is even calmer  bathed in your energy, we have lived a thousand lives, yet I am attracted magnetically to your complete soul essence

Like a moth to a flame, attempting to avoid the pain and dancing with the danger that for so many reasons is wrong, but feels right. Souls know no boundaries.

Living in the material plane conditioned by culture and society's conventions, invoke limitations, which in turn  focus on surmountable challenges

Yet I have a quiet happiness and a joyous & peaceful serenity within,  where sometimes confusion looms, but love still grows and rises to support you.
Thought & meanderings
Paul Stevens May 2018
From the first time  I saw you I was intrigued a pretty face an intelligent face with eyes of blue so bright and sparkling! becoming more curious as we spoke as if  we both on an island in the crowded room, I was captivated!

Our language a little hampered by different languages but communication flowed. Disappointment followed very shortly after the discovery you already part of an others life, strong energy felt a friendship it could be, contacts given, promising to exchange some information of mutual interest.

Another meeting we met you accompanied by your partner, me with my friends, a memory of something strange between you and him, unable to identify and then you were gone...years passed things got done and conversations with others discussed and work continued.
Paul Stevens May 2018
You walked in I was immediately mesmerised, an introduction, transfixed we speak exchanging words inquiring, discovering, the beauty unwinds like a flower petal by petal, layer by layer I am entranced by the warmth of your brown eyes, the loveliness of your smile and the vision before me draws me in further, your voice is like honey, viscous and sweet but strong, I study your mouth and notice the little wrinkles  at the side of your lips when you smile, I feel the energy you project all encompassing and I bathe in your glow, oblivious to everyone else in the room, my focus is on you and all that you are, I immediately have this urge to tell you about my recent life and the collection of events that brought me to this time and place because I know you will want to hear about it and understand, instantly.

I reconsider my behaviour since my arrival and I sense the peace and love that we could experience together as well as the excitement I feel it n my stomach, my heart is opening and vibrating with love, a love of acceptance and belonging, is this possible I ask myself,  I believe in the universe and all its infinite power providing a strong guidance for me, everything happens for a reason, we meet others to learn, to love, to achieve different levels of understanding, there is no such thing as coincidence, it is as it is meant to be, I suppress my doubts and fears and accept that this is a beginning perhaps of a longer journey to greater happiness or an episode of my life where I will learn something wonderful, intrigued I continue to inquire and discuss wanting to know more and listen to your speaking, your emotional intelligence absorbs me and happily relaxed I enjoy the conversation wondering if we will meet again and share some personal time over a glass of wine or a coffee, we exchange contact details and I imagine how nice it will be to see you again, A hug a kiss on the cheek and we part until the next time…
Love, feelings, Mystery
Paul Stevens Jun 2016
Pressure rising, tempered by alcohol's warm embrace, a discussion - too late! A kiss is taken and given, more of the same. lips searching for more of the same.

The pleasure savoured, almost as quickly it's over amongst the surprised smiling faces.

An illicit action between two great friends, though sweetly received it can't  happen again.

Each action questioned,  thoughts are thought, doubts rise,  feelings hastily hidden again,
Paul Stevens Jun 2016
I love your soul, the way you think, your consideration, your tenderness, your strength, your softness, your gentleness, the way you smile, your voice, your looks, your cautiousness, your forthrightness, the way you laugh, your mind, your eyes, your smell, your hair, your taste in design, the way you dress(even the quirky side), your love of animals, your modesty, your courage, your sense of right & wrong, your kindness, your “aye aye”, your promotion of me, your support, the peace I feel when I am with you, the excitement when you're close to me, the fact I miss you when I am not with you and how I look forward to when I am with you. and the delicious prospect of discovering much more.
Paul Stevens Jun 2016
"A open heart, yet still guarded can feel love like no other
Tempered by experience, love's an old friend returning
Warm and gracious, yet riotous and exciting"
Paul Stevens Apr 2015
A drop of rain splashes onto his cheek, it is brushed away as the others had been, it had been almost three hours but still he waited, casting his eyes around the vista in front of him, refocusing his gaze through the telescopic sight and along the now wet steel of the rifles barrel, blue-black in the tiny gaps between the camowrap which merged with the foliage of his cached viewpoint, as the crosshairs snapped into clarity, He felt comfortable that he was well hidden from prying eyes, waiting was almost a meditation to him over the months he had been tasked with this duty he had grown to love the solitude it was a time to reflect, a time to listen to the birds and insects as he waited like a wild cat moving very little, almost  still and at the same time his mind concentrated on the target, the rain was getting heavier now although he had picked this spot at the base of a large plane tree, sheltered from the weather under the spreading crown of well-leaved branches, long bull grass directly in front of him he was warm and well protected by the elements with only a few drops of rain falling annoyingly on his cheek...,

He was a long way from the constant 28 degrees celsius and sunny days of his homeland  and his lovely Angela, how he missed her infectious laugh and freely given affection..".shake yourself up man you need to think of the job, you're not here to be emotional ! "

He blinked and refocused as he opened his eyes and stared through the cross hairs he saw a shadow shape change, a movement, he took a deep breath and flicked off the safety catch, gently squeezed the trigger and held it almost like the clutch on a European Manual car engaged in a hill start, two camo-clad figures emerged armed with assault rifles, (check - AK47 not accurate over this range - no immediate danger. ) Then he saw his target - a man in his fifties, long flowing silvery white hair slim build, dressed in black, this time looking like a special ops crew member without the training, ' thwack thwack ' one  bullet in the body and one in the head, his target was down even before his bodyguards had realised, beads of sweat formed on his brow as he buried himself deeper into the ground, keeping just one eye on the target zone, counting mentally and trying to keep his heart beat as slow as possible, he waited for the bodyguards to choose a route towards him, 17 seconds after the shooting "what were they waiting for?" At last they broke off in differing directions leaving a way through for him to get to his extraction point, deftly he dismantled his ****** rifle with controlled actions practiced time and time again -automatic now! 21 seconds he moved away stealthy stealing the space around the trees, a shadow in the depths of shadow melting into the undergrowth, he hears shouting and confused conversation.

In his new hiding place now waiting, completely merged into the darkness unseeable by the untrained eye, wait he must as he presses the button on his wristwatch to activate his extraction beacon it is now 43 seconds after the target had been eliminated !
Later sitting on the nearest seat to the open door of the Seahawk 27 minutes after the last shot -all in a day's work soon he would be on the deck of the aircraft carrier at anchor in the gulf of Aqaba, the debrief done and then home to his lovely Angela.

But until then he needed to ride the storm of palpitations, sweats and waves of anxiety and the deep dark mind that always accompanied a '****'..
More of an observation
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