I can't compute and become mute
When you walk by
My circuitry is fried
Because your program is an encryption
And your pulse is electromagnetic
My car dies, so does my phone, so does my home
I'm immobilized
And demoralized
By immoral ties
To temporary generators
They're validating veneraters
Ultimately unsatisfying
When you're still not buying
I'm attracted to your charge
Until there's a battery
Yet you're the cure to your lure
The EMT for your EMP

Your negative charge casts a cloud around my nucleus
But if you could be positive for a change
We could meet in the middle
And feel energy in our synergy
But as soon as I feel electricity between us
You shut me down
With your EMP
I can't get free

I'm employed
But not enjoyed
They're annoyed
Until I'm destroyed
Then they fill that void
With another humanoid

I'm a hollow coil
From lots of toil
Like hot oil
I'm not royal
I just boil
Underneath the soil

I say howdy
Loudly
To the rowdy
That doubt me
And out me
As mouthy

This mistake
Fish tank
I drank
Stank
So rank
My mind went blank

I cannot fight it
My mind on autopilot
The roof I tile it
To style it
Violet
While lit

I am a changeling
That is aging
From waging
A war raging
Against those caging
The rat who's racing

The pain is inner
As a fidget spinner
A ****** sinner
Ate for dinner
For he's the winner
Of the money printer
And my mind of cinder

They broke me
No joking
Just poking
The nope king
While hoping
Society starts sloping
Towards communal coping

I hang out with friends
But I get an empty feeling
When the fun times end
After hitting the ceiling
Silence makes me descend
Until my brain starts peeling
From the heavy rain that's wielding
The emotions my friends were shielding

Life seems pretty hollow
After the friends I follow
Leave me in misery to wallow
With pills that are hard to swallow

There's a fly placed in the ointment
Prescribed to cure my disappointment
That became problem avoidance
Bringing agony's annoyance

Why did I feel so empty
Once they finally left me
In a depression hefty
Blocking the best me
With desperation testing
My desire to start texting
Looking for the next thing
Instead of resting
I keep wrestling
In my nest of stings

Once I go home
To my snow cone
Of a low tone
To throw stones
At ghost phones
I feel most unknown

I need purpose
I need direction
But all my searches
Are to satisfy my *******
For a loneliness deflection
That won't cure my infection
Of aimless dejection

Should I end my life in solitude?
Or would that be viewed
As way too rude?
I tried to summon a druid
To escape these ruins
But you became a bruin
Speaking anguish fluent

Save me from thinking
To save me from sinking
The alcohol I'm drinking
Is to avoid the stinking
Of us not linking

Without you
I lose
Then I use
To disprove
The sense of doom
That only grew
Once you withdrew

I'm a relationship engineer
Building engines to persevere
Through the loneliness I fear
That makes me panic
And seek out a mechanic
That tinkers
With my blinkers
But doesn't fix a thing
When I'm left with a sting
From what's defined as a fling

My pistons pumping
The way I'm *******
When I find a rocket scientist
That formulates the highest bliss
In his carefully calculated kiss

But I start to viciously *****
When our problems are subatomic
Because every decision
Creates nuclear fission
Which causes decay
And explosions of energy
His thoughts he relays
He sees me as the enemy

So I find a Christian
To pump my pistons
He has the morals of God
Which I figure can't be flawed
Though they may seem odd

But he doesn't love me
He feels he's above me
He acts like a martyr
Which makes me fall harder
But I'm left alone on the cross
He has forsaken me
He thinks I'm made of frost
He has mistaken me
I feel alone
In the brimstone
Of his dial tone

I found loneliness
In their phoniness
My engine needs trust
Otherwise it develops rust
But when everyone tries to act cool
Pain becomes my alternative fuel
Love once seemed like a jewel
Until my blood made a pool
I tried to get repairs
To find that nobody cares
I learned that science
Was of no reliance
And the pious life
Brought riot strife
So I find nowhere to turn
While my engine burns

I am pure subjectivity
I am objectivity contained by a brain
I am an entity
Inside a body
I control my limbs
And my organs control me
The apparatus for my entity

I am a being that seeks understanding
While remembering who I stand under
Those who sneakily seek to plunder
The developing enigmatic wonder
In my mind's torturous tundra

My mind uses my body as a slave
But is also a slave to the shame
Of my body's interactions
Within marginalized factions
There is a fight between the two
Like the fights between me and you
My body won't quit when my mind is through
And my mind stays conscious while my body is blue
So I'm stuck in a deadlock
With a mentality of bedrock

Once I cease to be human
I can be the perfect judge
When my emotions won't budge
I'll see things the way most organisms do
Inside this zoo
Animals have the flu
And give it to each other
When we communicate through pain
The flu actually seems tame
Compared to your game
Of taking humanity
And leaving an entity
After you entered me
My somber soul left
Because of personality theft

My mind moves my arms
To block the pain
My mind moves my feet
To do the same
Yet I lost these advantages
When I had to walk too far
My life only got more hard
After experiencing your entropy
I became a disembodied entity

They fingerpick on the guitar
while I toe pick on the ice;
my equipment doesn't fit as well
as each note in each composition they write.
After building brick walls in front of the net
their slapbass slapshots destroy my defenses
until their goals plague my crease.

While trying to set focus on my own game
loud cheering emits from various venues
for Mozart writing his first symphony at 6
Orson Welles directing Citizen Kane at 25
Johnny Depp originating that last line at 31
and Patrick Mahomes, whom I'm older than.

Competition is healthy, functional
until the unstable heat of boiling envy
releases the steam of resentment
building pressure in the machinery
until the screws pop out like marbles
knocking each other out of bounds.

Daftly defining ego as the self
and success as superiority
and achievement as relative,
I race against relatives;
each pace they gain
is a slap in the face in the rain
stinging while slipping while
blaming the elements
precipitating my demise.

Gripping graphite too tightly
vulcanized rubber goes wide
shattering through plexiglass
and into the rib cage
of an innocent bystander
dropping his concessions
to climb the stairs to the sky box
while I wait for repairs to be made.

Eric Bischoff ran World Championship Wrestling
Otherwise known as WCW
The only wrestling company to beat the WWF/WWE in the ratings
(At least in the modern era)
Eric Bischoff made many mistakes
And they're well documented
He had many triumphs
And they're well documented
But on top of his successes and failures
Is a mountain of lies
Which are well documented
By wrestling's version of tabloid journalists
Otherwise known as "dirt sheet writers"
Who sell lies and gossip to their marks
They sell the delusion of knowing the inner workings of wrestling
They sell the inner workings of a dirt sheet writer's imagination
Negativity, cynicism, petulance and paranoia
Eric Bischoff has a distaste for these writers
Because their lies taint the viewer's experience
He tries to fight their lies with truth
But his effort is futile
Because there's an endless amount of pessimists
Willing to believe any cynical narrative thrown their way
And there's only one Eric Bischoff

I don’t want to consume art to escape my life
I want art that makes me confront my life
I want art that uncovers my blind faults
and reveals my secret triumphs.
What do I need to change?
Why do I need to change?
How do I need to change?
And why is the time for change now?
These questions help me escape from needing escapism.

I live inside my shell
In a world I will leave
So I feel compelled
To live my romantic dream
But people tell me it's not Adam and Steve
And what they really believe
Is I'm going to Hell
Well they can call me Eve
And this is where I fell

We all joined the party as friends
But the moment we were invited
We started being divided
Our agency we lose
To words heard in pews
Or shouted on the news
My once loyal glance
Becomes a soiled trance
As we put pettiness on the pedestal
And yearn to meddle in the petals
Of the roses that were frozen
For the sake of the chosen
By fate
To be the life of the event
But when strife is their intent
I find myself incensed
With problems I invent
My faults won't relent
My incessant repentance
Falls on deaf ears
Contempt it endears
But if we followed those apologies
Discoveries would be made
That'd somehow effect friendships
And their limits would be endless
But this party has a temptress
Wearing shiny things
Like expensive gold rings
We lust for the material
Forgetting the ethereal
Love becomes imperial
As we try to conquer each other
With kisses that feel like punches
And punches that feel like kisses
We want to break out of our solitude attendance
And our validation relies on another's dependence
When the music at the party
Is constant
Creating a craving for company
But the noises of social interaction
Never matched the beauty of the music
As life is weighed down by banality
We look to it's finality
And wonder if the party could've been different
Without the nuisance of the Devil's imprint

Last night I had a dream about you
We were at an event
Kissing passionately
And just as I was about to go down on you
You looked away
And saw other people watching
You pushed me away instinctively
And as you looked down at me
I could see the love of my only friend
Disappear behind an expression between disgust and pity
Right before I witnessed our friendship vanish completely
I woke up
Next to a cell phone
Conveying your invitation to an event
Unaware of the nightmare event I just attended with you
Unaware of all the other slumber parties we've been to
Unaware every moment I spend with you is the event

I’m with you every day
you could say there are days I’m not
but those are just lapses in time
where the sun and moon
rise and fall
obsessing
over your presence and absence
while I’m drifting through time
to drift with you.

Some people say every life is priceless
And that abortion is ******
Then they tell me I’m worthless
And ask me to **** myself
What the ****?

My tires went over the cracks in the road
As I drove by people standing on the sidewalk
Exchanging words, emotions, dreams
I passed them on my way to the cul-de-sac
To exchange money, drugs, humanity
The pedestrians penetrated me
With piercing eyes of persecution
They thought they hated me for being there
But their hatred is what led me there
They injected hatred into my life
The way I injected ****** into my arm
They injected banality into my life
The way I injected ****** into my brain
They injected austerity into my life
The way I injected ****** into my heart
They prayed that my sedation was of a more permanent nature
Before that they prayed for the permanent sedation
of my ****** nature
Wanting me to be fully awake
But not fully alive
They snuck into my mind
And exchanged emotions with emptiness
I snuck into their house
And exchanged furniture with emptiness
They exchanged words with the police
Who exchanged my freedom
For everyone else's peace of mind
But the exchange between the excommunicated
Exacerbated my exiled existence
The steel bars placed before me
Paled in comparison
To the bars that surrounded my heart
And faded from memory
When the Xanax bars entered my system
Until I couldn't walk anymore
Making me Professor X
Hiding out with the other mutants
Trying to lecture the world
That zombies turn to demons
If the exchange isn't examined
When they exit their enclosure
Sidewalk standers turn to explanations more elementary
Eliminating empathy
While elevating themselves above us
This is the epitome of our exchange

I want an exclusive relationship
but I don’t know why
I try to tell myself I don’t want a disease
or that cheating would prove you don’t love me
but if I’m being honest with myself
I’m afraid you’ll find somebody better
either better at ***
or better at caring
or better financially
whatever it takes to be better enough
to make me an unacceptable option
and our relationship an exclusionary one.

I am in a terrifying tug-of-war
With time
There's an excessive amount of gore
And grime
While time continues to make ground
Pulling gradually until I'm down
I can only lengthen this glorious game
Yet the outcome is always the same

No matter how much I resist
I exist
Allow me to flash my existential credentials
I'm here
I'm alive
I fear
I will die

When existence is the only requirement
Everything else is a possibility
Dependent on our capabilities
And trying to wisely pick our life's priorities
That naturally give way to our inferiority

I didn't insist
To exist
With clenched fists
In this murderous mist
That slowly slits my wrists
So what do I do
In this zigzag zoo?
Hopefully spend time with you

I’m being tickled to death
begging not to die through laughter.

Driving down the freeway in Kentucky, there are only a couple exits people expect you to take. Lexington or Louisville,
pick one. Otherwise, what specific business
do you have going on in Sadieville?

I'm one of the unknown exitters
living 20 minutes off the Mt. Zion Road exit.
No one gets off this exit but me
onto a lonely drive through the trees.

I live off an exit where the vultures eat the dead, then perch on the trees that are dead, deceased in defeat under the feet that eat.
The graves of unknown soldiers lie buried beneath
convenience stores. The storefront sign says open
but the discordance inside is close.

Wandering in the wilderness
while the wind whistled my sins
you joined me in Union
after you missed the right exit.

Voices from the nether sent you letters saying things are better up north. My box on the side of the road holds notes that were
written with the intention of being read, but they're just
thrown out with the junkmale instead.

You burned too hot and I burned too much
in a snare I was caught once you abstained from touch
You were all I had, this isn't New York City
how many people am I supposed to have with me?

150 years ago, brother fought brother over the lives of their brothers here. Not much has changed since then.
A grave robber's eyes are seen in the faces of
wanderers. Welcomes only last until usefulness has passed.

You kept driving through
I wish I could exit too
but will Ohio be any better?
Once you find out send me a letter.

Things blow up
People throw up
And then walk on
A land mine
When they talk on
A landline

I try to enjoy myself
But enjoyment has stealth
And eludes
Which secludes
Happiness hides
Behind sentinel shrapnel
That makes us abide
The rules of this flat Hell

There are frequent explosions in my mind
They are sequenced implosions through time
I have poor explanations
For my inflammations
My hands fumble
My brain crumbles
Progress is lost
That's the cost

Frustration cooks
From holy books
And constitutions
That can't be changed
Or rearranged
So we're gridlocked in an explosion
In Hell's fruitless fire we are frozen

Explosions dot the planet like acne
Humanity has no choice except to get older
Sharing information is our main asset yet we grow colder
We must evolve together
We're doomed to be tethered
So we must gel
To avoid Hell
There are monsters in our midst
In our mind is where they sit
We must expel them together
Or we'll be exploding forever

I close my two eyes
I can’t see anything
I need a hand
from my pineal gland
to give me some vision
projections hit the back of my eyelids
showing me images conjured by myself
I am the artist and the audience
finally a filmmaker
but I have no editor
every edition is a suicide cut
the assembly footage with no assembly
different stories with the same outcome
being stuck in a homicide rut
different possibilities creating a medley
of my own creations hunting me
with the faces of others plastered on
in this world my mind is God
isolating flaws and fears
always feeling the end is near
when there was no beginning
to moving pictures with no plot
just mapping out my mind rot
showing me my insecurities and anxieties
leaving me insecure and anxious
I’m starting to hate the author of these stories
but the more I hate him the more they get gory.

A platform is shared
By bigots being scared
By change in the air
In range of what’s fair
So they callously pair
With arms to bear
To harm and tear
Those the meek spare

Weapons will be used
As factions fuse
Their hateful views
To give me a bruise
And lie in the news
Or blame the Jews

They go through a bitter tunnel
Acting as the wealthy’s funnel
Exploiting their grumbles
To get them to rumble
And not act humble

Arcade style fights
Illuminate the night
With exploding lights
Shining very bright
Signaling the plight
Of losing our sight
And relying on might
After shifting far right

They want the throne
For their own all alone
And their wants have grown
So we’re stripped to the bone
By a hound and his gun
In town with his son
Who drowns us for fun
For his money has won

So miscellaneous  
Missiles maiming us
With no training rust
Cause raining dust
That’s draining trust
In its radius

No compassion or mercy
They’ve lost the church key
Thoughtlessly hurting
Those seen as *****
Mortars strike angels passing above
Trying to disseminate their love
To those with bullet in glove
Who just push and shove
The transcendent ones
So we can’t be absolved
As the nations devolve
Into a racist right wing resolve

The proud and stupid
Team with the putrid
To **** Cupid
Because he ignored them
Creating the problem’s stem
Creating the bombs we send
Creating the lies we defend
For the extent
Of excess
They expect

An empire’s implosion
Will bring atomic explosions
Yet we watch the erosion
Completely frozen

I'm a facsimile
a fake
emptiness filling me
I think
I don't know
it sinks
in a heart of stone
protected by gnarled bone
creating a hollow home
for veins carrying a mannequin's blood
so I can be Zap Brannigan smug
with no plan to win love
just fill a hole in my heart
when I draw and discard
avoiding any form of vulnerability
so I can act cruel willingly
and shirk my responsibility
to my fellow man
I'm well off ******
overestimating my self worth
to save me from getting hurt
by people that act like myself
this can't be good for my health.

They say it's darkest before the dawn
But that's where they're wrong
I fall down an abyssal pit
The bottom I'll hit
It gets darkest before I impact the ground
It gets darkest when I can't hear a sound
There is darkness in my dimly lit heart
That has gradually grown from the start
It gets darker as I helplessly fall
And I continue to plunge further
Like when she won't answer the call
Because she thinks you'll hurt her
You think you've hit the floor
But then you go tragically lower
When you stare at the door
Or search for a four-leaf clover
No peace can be attained
So I fall like rain

It becomes the season of fall
When I have no reason at all
So I fall down a tunnel
That acts as a funnel
Steering lost souls in death's direction
Steering me from my own reflection
The darkness is a deadly infection
I contracted at the moment of conception

I stood outside smoking a cigarette
thinking of all the politicians I resent
I got light headed and hit the cement
and found pain possible to prevent.

My dead weight fell on my arm
jamming my paralyzed fingers
doing my innate shoulder harm
the pain in my elbow still lingers.

You said I should stop smoking
I said I should stop steaming
but it's my only way of coping
with the things that I'm dreaming
drawn from these things that I'm gleaming
from the top of a tower that's leaning
I see a tiresome war beneath me
and fall on my arm obliquely.

Suspicion runs rampant
No trust can be found
Even when lies are recanted
To their nature we’re bound
Releasing the hounds
Silencing sounds
Of victims drowned

Suspicion exacerbation
From false accusations
Causing ****** lacerations
Through spatial relations
Like shared incarceration
Or the local fascination
With public *******
Or child molestation

There are horrible people out there
They lack moral fiber
They do the wrong thing consistently
So in order to feel dignity
They develop extreme compartments of honor
And search so hard for instances to use it
It often comes out at inappropriate moments
And is used as an opportunity to signal masculinity
Imagine the person constantly yelling
“No one talks **** about my family/religion/country”
Then flies off the handle at the slightest perceived insult
This person may care about what they’re defending
But their defense is about themselves
And how badass and imposing they are

Conclusion jumping
Hatred pumping
******* lumping
The convicted with the accused
So with that flawed logic used
They decide to mercilessly bruise
Somebody a liar happened to choose

Why do people not always believe victims of crime?
The existence of liars
Who taint society with their dishonesty
Yet will never have to face their own impact
By apologizing to a survivor no one believes
For it is their kind
Manipulating minds
Turning men blind
Until trust is resigned

The liars mix with buyers
Lighting the world on fire
Creating an awful empire
Where the innocent are *****
And the innocent are slaughtered
I don’t know much more I can take
When no one seems bothered

I don’t have any answers
If we make penalties harsher on liars
We could discourage actual victims
But the injustice victims of false accusations deal with
Fills my heart with immense anger and frustration
People have no faith in our flawed justice system
So they look inside their own incapable minds
Deeming themselves the arbiters of justice
Too stupid to understand their lack of moral authority
That savage nature is reflected in the punishment they inflict
Innocent people die in a dark and lonely cell
While the rest of us must live in this deceitful hell
Where our minds are infected by hatred’s smell
We must pull love up from the spiritual well
To shield us from the ceaseless church bells

Those who lie
Mix with grime
Taking time
Deciding who dies
Innocent cries
Muted by guys
Smart as flies
That hatefully wait
For someone to mutilate
So they can prove they’re great
We must grow before it’s too late
And begin living in an empathetic state

I used to see cars individually
not as parts but the people inside
those people would be driving around me
and we’d wave to each other
while navigating clear roads
I would recognize their car
out of familiarity
the city has grown since then
I don’t recognize cars anymore
just brands and colors
creating the traffic jam in front of me
as my engine overheats.

I’m no stranger to rejection
I only need to hear no once
And I can accept it...

... to a certain extent

Just know if you’re rejecting me
I’ll take your answer seriously
But I’ve already crafted a fantasy in my mind
Where you’ve said yes a thousand times

Tripping on acid
I feel a strong urge to talk to my father
My authority figure
Out of the chaos
I depended on him to create order

You say you have chronic fatigue
I respond with so do I
You say I’m not in your league
The difference is I try

You say you have a disease
So you can stay on your knees
And beg and plead
For sympathy
Then you gatekeep
Based on sleep
So I can’t make a peep
Unless I’m curled in a heap

You have problems
But you abuse this
When you don’t solve them
They turn into excuses
You’re a hypochondriac
In a cycle so black
Your mind is cracked
From panic attacks

I’m not here to jeer
Those paralyzed by fear
But once you are near
I meet your whiny leer
As you show a clear lack of empathy
Saying no one else understands depression
I constantly feel it enter me
I just don’t make the same concessions

I don’t mind if you take medicine
For your head to win
Against the grim
But don’t tell me you have it worse
From your self imposed curse
Living in the back of a hearse
Because when I say you should stop running
I see a shitstorm coming
With war drums drumming
Showing energy that’s stunning
I guess it was reserved for hunting

—After Sum 41

Through your social distortion of extortion at the
most absurd proportions, I realize I need a doctor
not a proctor for when I test the helicopter you said
you’d never offer to a lowly pauper. You could say it’s my
bad I even tried that so now I cry-laugh in the lilacs while my mom
throws bombs through satcoms to lighten the weather. I should’ve
known better and left the head sever nether that continuously had
me tethered to the emotionally unfettered. I really need to find an
honest man before I enforce a plan of a 1000th trimester abortion.
                                                                                              bortion
                                                                                         bortion
                                                                                     bortion  
                                                                                bortion
                                                                            bortion
                                                                        bortion
                                                                    bortion
                                                                bortion
                                                            bortion
                                                        bortion
                                                    bortion
After all the fat lips you gave me I
realized I’m a matchstick baby and don’t
need your rabies to save me. I don’t think I want
to live in your lair with your despair share stares turning to
a bitter taste once I start to face the human waste
falling on my head when I fall in your bed instead of my
king sized comforter singing trumpeter of a simple time—
childhood confined, morality defined by design until I become
the demons as you free them for freedom until they’re just another
lover to call my brother. The hits to my lips caused a casualty
of me casually even though I was never alive actually. Of
all the fists fighting me, it’s you I’d like to remove from society.

There's a line drawn in the sand
It's a line drawn by the man
It's a line drawn by the hand
That feeds
Our breed
Misery

There are lines drawn on our faces
As sand hits the ground
These fault lines are from the races
Our lives have found
The lines get deeper
Like cuts on our skin
The lines get steeper
Like our chance to win

We're thrown into a landslide
We see the ground collapsing
For all the silly things we lie
And the things we say in passing
The momentum of this earthquake
Will never cease, only take
And these tectonic plates shift
When we live a hectic hate rift

I need safety
To embrace me
And save me from my world imploding
Before anyone can say they know me
But the planet is shaking
My mangled mind aching
I trap myself inside a steel vault
Never forgetting this is my fault

I’m a performing circus bear
Traveling the world with my master
Who treats me as an equal
So we are comfortable companions
And make an amazing team
Performing spectacular shows for rabid audiences
Who don’t appreciate our effort
They try to antagonize and diminish us
But we remain stoic
Until today
A heckler grabs my ear
My feral nature gets the best of me
So I snap at them
I instantly realize my mistake
And so does my master
He shakes his head and walks away
Leaving me heartbroken
Without my only friend and protector
My overwhelming regret and sorrow make no difference
I’m reminded of where I stand with humans
As they euthanize me

Most people understand fighting is immoral and shameful
(plenty of exceptions obviously).
People also understand there are situations where one must fight
(to maintain agency).
So the idea is to avoid those kinds of situations
(to circumvent compromising morality).

Hockey is the only major sport not based around fighting that you can fight in
And not get ejected from the game
The referees just give each player five minute penalties
Some players will use this to their advantage
And try to pick fights with players more valuable than them
Creating an equalizing equation
Raising their value to the player they eliminated
And bringing that player down to their level

I don't have to drive my car
To go to the online bar
So I can acquire a date
With my potential mate
But once I entered the seedy site
I experienced an unexpected plight
Everybody in the place
Had a silly dog face
It seemed like a furry paradise
I couldn't believe my feral eyes
They try to make me see through a filter
In order to purposely throw me off kilter
Covering up their eyes, nose, and cheeks
There's a smell of deception that reeks
Their lies
Draw flies
I sniff them out with my canine nose
As my willingness to be alone grows
Because everyone is a liar
Which extinguishes my fire
So I filter them from my life
In order to avoid strife
Yet I keep hopefully searching for love
Symbolized by, but not literally, a dove
I want to view the world through rose-filtered glasses
But I desperately look around only to see dogs' *****

Do I want to see the forest through the trees
if that also means the hornets in between?
There's a comfort trail of nothingness
leading beyond the sun setting west
towards a dark abyss looming
my friends try to soothe me
by saying it'll be like before I was born
but at that point my life ****** even more
so the vastness of the universe
reminds me that my bullet hearse
isn't blessed or cursed
it'll just disperse
like the tears on the face of my clock
coming from the face I show not
a shocked ant on a spinning rock
with vertigo fearing it'll fall off
knowing once the spinning stops
there's a darkness block
with nothing to be bought
or sold
not even gold
can reverse getting old
so I don't want to see the forest
and I'll hide behind the trees
getting lower on my knees
praying God help me please
because I fear that final release.

Your friendship feeds the fire
Because you're my entire
You're my whole completion
But I have a worry secretion
You'll use a companion deletion

When we're having fun
You and I are one
I feel extremely close to you
For you teach me the value of two
But you begin to lose me
At the introduction of three
Jealousy piles on more
Once you reach four
And so on and so on
Until I'm all gone

The fire we've built together is too great
I fear the day
You are burnt by the friendly fire
The pain brings you to your senses
And you notice the extent of my wildfire
Having no semblance of control
It must be extinguished
Because by this point
It's all I can see
Part of my family tree
A fire that burns so bright
It protects me from night
But the fire was so red
It travelled to my head
You see how that went
With me pitching a tent
To hide in solitude
From the steam that rises
When fires must be put out

Bats found residence in my fireplace
discovering shelter in
protective brick walls.
Cold fronts attack in sunshine absence
I want to ignite a flame                 but
I fear the bats will infest my home
                      a home the bats see
as an addition to my fireplace.

Your advice
Is my vice
And you continue to add vices
And you swim like mad pisces
Through my stream of thoughts
With all the lessons you taught
From all the advice you brought
So I avoid your glance
To not give you the chance
To see the results of our fishdance
Or how much my life has been enhanced
Until I begin to flounder
As those pisces become piranha
Feeding on other considerations
And growing colossal
Until your kraken is in my mind
Cracking up my mind
Stacking up the time
It takes to get out of bed
As I trust the tentacles that tie me down
To a life floating on the surface
Of an ocean
Where the fish burn like a furnace
And I watch the water evaporate
Like the advice on which you elaborate
As the advice that was once there
Is currently water vapor in the air
As I start to think of us as a pair
From inside my secret underwater lair
That is the cavern of my mind
Where a school of fish
Teach me how to live and die

I drown under the weight of what floats
Yes, what floats...
What floats through the air when you look at me
What floats through my mind when you smile
And what floats through my dreams while I sleep
You float through my life
The way Earth floats through space
And space floats through time
And time floats into the unknown
All the more excruciating considering
Earth, space, time, and the unknown are what complicate our situation so much
I try to vocalize your essence
But my words come across as saccharine
They do not touch your brilliance
Because you float against the current
So I must swim
Swim to find my way to you
So we can float together
Until then though...
I must float to keep from drowning
I must swim to keep from floating
Yet I drown to keep from swimming
You're my trumpet in the dark
I hear your horn leagues under the water
Yet when I reach out to touch you
Nothing is there...
Nothing is here...
I see disappointment and hatred floating near you
I see regret and shame floating on the horizon
So I float here...
And drown under the weight of what floats

For forty days and forty nights
We had no reasons to fight
So the planet was flooded
By the warm blooded

******* soaked
Visible ******
No more cloaks
No more loners
For everyone there was a match
But here's the insidious catch
It didn't take long for people to get bored
And start cutting and crossing cords
Until we resembled a chaotic horde

For forty days and forty nights
The Earth was flooding
Until things got muddy
And clouded transcendence
In the form of independence

Our lives keep knotting together
Our lives are rotting endeavors
We were completely happy
But felt that was too sappy
We sought edgy darkness
In a world that was shark-less
We made the world we live in
By putting on shark fins
And eating those that fall overboard
Out of their relationship
We try to be their overlord
Or add them to our list
Love grants a clenched fist
When there is value to a kiss

For forty days and forty nights
We turned on Earth's floodlights
And the world was flooded by love
Until we decided to try to look above
To see nothing there
Just the empty air

There was a time when there was love
Now there is none
Only a gun
And the number one

The weather is foggy
because the bog bleeds
like my problems lofty
making things foggy.
These problems haunt me
when the forecast is foggy.
I start to become not me
after my reflection lost me
in this hellish hot spring
where the fog is accosting
my vision’s focus and locking
until I absolutely cannot see
through this mist so foggy
my brain gets groggy
with the pain I’m dodging
blasting through the fog feed
making this innocent dog bleed
under the leaves of God’s tree
the same tree that made God leave
where an apple made things foggy.

I think you’re neat
So we meet in heat
Between the sheets
But after the feat
We begin to speak
And smell what reeks

I don’t want to lose a catch
Because our views don’t match
So I become too attached
To the ruined batch
Of fumes I hatched

We try to force a square peg into a round hole
Until we’re a pair of legs on the ground cold
Trying to sound bold
Like we’ve found gold
While we’re down low
Where we drown slow
With a brown nose

You force the issue
So I dismiss you
Making a lit fuse
Out of my bliss muse
That I misused

I force your hand
So you take a stand
And follow your plan
Brandishing a brand
That’ll make me grand
If I live off your land

I want to run free with the horses
Away from the illuminating torches
Of your controlling forces
Acting like college courses
That don’t require sources

We’ve explored this door
To its core
Let’s say no more
While we’re on the shore
Instead of hitting the floor
Of what’s in store

We simply weren’t compatible people
So let’s move on to our sequels
While seeing each other as equals
That weren’t forced into a deep hole
Of the other’s blind forceful evil

They nickel and dime me
So money can't find me
While debt keeps climbing
With inconvenient timing
A note reading foreclosure
Spells my doom
As a realtor's brochure
Sells my room
Poverty looms
Over my head
As everything is taken
Even the bread
And what I use to bake it

They come with a gun
Demanding that I run
They tell me I can't stay here
Police presence engenders fear
So this place I once held dear
Will no longer be near
And the bank
Maintains rank
Over the poor
Locking the door
So I hit the floor
Hatred in my core
I adopt an attitude
Of eat or be eaten
This simple platitude
Will get me beaten

Money isn't that hard to make
If that's all you're trying to do
Yet they take all they can take
Like they've got something to prove
They don't mind
Separating bees from the hive
Power is control money buys
So the rich are seen as wise
Even if they're destroying the world
Forcing families from their homes
And now the rocks they hurl
Are delivered by drones
From lethality to loans
We're stripped to the bone
And feel all alone
On a planet of exploitation
It's tough to live the full duration
When we're stuck at a bus station
Called placation
Where the wealthy do what they want
Because they have money to flaunt
Giving them status and power
To build their ivory tower
By evicting delinquents
And bombing huts
A dog-like sequence
We're treated like mutts

The cumulus accumulate
Usurping heaven's gate
Creating a second rate
Decrepit estate
For us to deflate
Into a state
Of hate
And wait
For a mate
To feel great
So our slate
Has low weight
But once it gets late
We ask for a rebate

We run for the frivolous
But that fun is insidious
And it's slowly killing us
From emptiness filling us
We withdraw into shells
Of similar mundane hells
Until the bank comes knocking
Then into the streets we're flocking
While they're progress blocking
And pistol cocking
We kneel and worship them
Begging for mercy
They're the problem's stem
Yet we wear their jersey
Which is absolute insanity
But money controls humanity

Thorns in my eyes
I’m born among flies
In a shrouded surprise
Of a forest of lies
Where the trees block out the sun
Eternal night is lit by the gun
I have no time to be stunned
I must run

I tried to sunbathe
Unscathed
But gun spray
Led one way
To my brain
Becoming insane
In pain

I was indeed roused
From my treehouse
Once their breed browsed
My need for clouds
A lumberjack
Plunder attack
Sunder stacked
My world to black

I tried to go hiking
But met a Viking
Constantly striking
To his liking
I wear sleeves of leaves
And greaves of weeds
That don’t impede
What makes me bleed

I cannot track
All the attacks
And trajectory of flak
Hitting my back
So I hide in a hollow log
In a disgusting bog
From bloodlust dogs
Who are simple cogs

The cunning demons
Lurk in tree limbs
And breed sin
To feed in
Through the canopy
Of their insanity
I cannot see
Any humanity

The porous forest
Forces
Wild horses
Onto mild courses
For they can’t see the forest through the trees
And what they do see is from their knees
As they beg and plead
The gods of greed
Who have them treed

The evil tree branches
Summon an enchantress
Who can incant this
Closed fist
I use as a machete
To cut down the petty
Like they’re light confetti
For a fight I’m ready

Birds chirping                wind blowing
doors swing open                   floodgates of chaos
noise                  people                          beeh­ive buzzing
unease               uncertainty                                           unable
customers noisy as dishes clanging                                       in the back
focus                  obscured                             ­                  insecurity
offensive presence                                 apologetic demeanor
forgive me brother                  for I have sinned
optical trajectory                     floor
please                          thank you
hands                 pockets
forgive me.

I’m unraveling
In a grave gravelly
Light speed traveling
From the judge gaveling

They’re trying to persecute me
Like it’s their divine duty
Like desperate pigs rooting
For their rejuvenating truffles
In my dying screams muffled
By the executioner’s muscle

I’m paranoid
And it’s not the ****
I stare into the void
That makes me bleed
Only to see
Humanity
Staring back at me
With ****** teeth

I maintain my vitality
By matching their morality
Conforming infallibly
To society around me

They try to peek through my window
Every time the wind blows
So I keep the lights dimmed low
To cover my sin’s glow
And quietly tiptoe
Through the big show

They see through my disguise
And start to despise
They ask me to die
And I ask them why
Have I hurt a fly?
If they hate me so much
Why don’t they **** me?
Instead of avoiding my touch
With abandonment chilling

I can smell death in the air
When they say life isn’t fair
Before they try to not care
And attack me on a dare
After many hateful stares
From their disdainful lair

God uses pain to teach
So they use pain to preach
Giving me grief
Over the life I seek
So my eyes will leak
As the sky turns bleak
From lies to the meek

My sins I confess
As an SOS
To bless my mess
Despite its pests
Of demonic tests

God doesn’t answer
He has forsaken me
Giving me cancer
He has mistaken me
For someone who gives a ****
My wrists He’ll slit
If He feels it fits
So why match wits
With almighty spit?

I'm loaded into the yellow tank
alien abduction
concrete mothership.
Matchsticks
floating near the bottom of a puddle
awaiting transportation through their designated tributaries
they want to be burned out
yet they float damp and unused.

Find a foxhole
head down dig in
no fortified bunker
crosshair jersey.
Snakes slither in the breezeway
sinister squirming tendrils
pervade ventilation shafts.

Pathological spores infect the air
pheromones drive creatures crazy
after the zookeeper injected rabies
cages banging at all hours
never loosen.
Hiding from a buzzsaw
every edge its own blade
all cutting in different ways
through hardened skin and molding clay.

Crouching in a crevasse
as a stampede tramples through
dirt is kicked in my face
but a lion's teeth cannot reach.
The herd keeps moving
but comfort isn't found in the current
raccoons and skunks wander bat caves
after mastering the scent of ammonia.

Amongst a hedgerow a vulpine den
lies parallel to the road and ranches
in a burrow where the residents lay
between man's best friend and vermin.

Imperial hunters track serpentine paw prints
that lead underground; a temporary home.
A permanent grave; a house for humans
must be built here, even if it means

eviction by execution
foreclosure by fire.

Smoke billows before American Foxhounds
drool dripping from canines; saliva trails lead
to their master's boots; the tactical militant kind.

A hollow existence is paved over
cementing a subterranean legacy.
Now the smoke billowing before the foxhounds
exits through the fireplace rising from the grave.

The teacher stands before her detained class
And from behind her authoritative podium
She equates abortion to the holocaust
A dangerous comparison in an educational garrison
But the other children nodded their heads in agreement
A benefit of having the ear of youth
Is being able to infect it with your own toxic ideology
What bacteria did this ear infection consist of?
Conservatism? Religiosity? Chastity?
The answer was depressingly simple
I was the only one there unaware of Fox News
I was a casualty of the confusion
The confusion engendered
By venom thoughts placing politic-colored glasses
on the entrenched masses
Entertainment
Used to convey anger and hate
Emotions worth conveying
But not living in
The intents and desires of their vulnerable receivers
become an incongruous disaster

What could I have done?
Minds as still as the pharaohs heart
We live in a society where we're all infantilized by one myth
Good and evil
Looking back on what I did do
I didn't do much
But I did do something
I didn't nod my head like a ******* sycophant

Sometimes I think about going back to ******
but always end up realizing I can’t
because that world would break me once more
because I’m too soft
I guess everyone is too soft
especially when they start using
many think they’ll be a bulb of light
illuminating a dim and darkened room
until the deader bulbs take advantage
draining the once bright bulbs
until they’re fragile shells.