an outward appearance?
or an inward experience?
does it define a person?
or does the person define it?
has it divided the world?
or has the world divided it?
is it from my mother?
or rather my father?
does it carry stigma?
or stigma has carried it?
is black shame?
is white yaaay?
does it change?
or do you change it?
do you accept it?
or live in rejection?
is it a social construct?
or a biological classification?

l felt like l knew you
but it was never about you
and l must have been confused
to think that l meant something to you

people change
seasons are the same
but l must have been insane
to think that this wasn't a silly game

play my heart
just as you play Fortnite
l wished to hold you one night
but you told me it just wasn't right

l loved you
something about you
that made me see only you
but now all l can say is l ******* hate you

with a simple hello
and a plain fine
l never knew that there was a fine line
between being something
or simply just wasting time
so l have decided to let you go
even if it makes my heart sore
but love is the loneliest place when you fall alone

don't you think you have had
enough
how many nights are you gonna
cry
over something that is now in your
past
you deserve all the good things in this
world
because you are made of
gold
even though they have abused
you
remember to always stay
true
to being in love with
you
because that dear
heart
will never make you
blue

SHATTER MY HEART AGAINST A WALL
THROW IT LIKE YOU WOULD A BALL
WATCH AS MY BLOOD DRIPS TO THE FLOOR
LOOK AS MY EYES TURN COLD
FOR LOVE IS A VICIOUS WAR
FILLED WITH BLOOD AND GORE
THE LIGHT IS GONE
NOW IN THE DARKNESS I GROW
YOUR CALLOUSED HANDS BREAKING MY BONES
STARE IN MY EYES
TAKE MY SOUL
YOU DIDNT CATCH ME IN MY FALL
AND HERE YOU SHALL WITHER AND GROW OLD
BECAUSE YOUR FAITHLESS LOVE
HAS MADE ME A RESIDENT
of sheol

a warrior
a sister
a friend
but most of all
a mother
who spreads her love
like the wings of the majestic eagle
she is
covering her eaglets with her warmth
and care
she is a true sight to behold
a tale never told
a book that never gets old
a day filled with warmth
a blooming rose
a protective wall
a melodic note
a defending fort
a love never known
words cannot describe her
but she takes it upon herself
to describe them
she is love
and so much more
she is my mom
she is my dad
l could never ask for more

the heart of a poet
bleeds
an oozing darkness that no one
sees
enveloping him until he can't
breathe
as he screams at you to just
leave
so that he can be
free
from the pain that you cause
him

my blood rushes in my head
leaving destruction in it's wake
making me feel insane
with the need to numb the pain

how did it get this way?
why do l see red?
who else is scared?
what comes next?

l have a rage
that paints my eyes red
makes me go mad
until all l want is death

why have we wasted time
why do l still cry
why do you lie
why have we pretended to love
why do l feel like a ***
why do you run
why have we been blue
why do l feel used
why do you use

loving you......











has taught me to love
MYSELF

to live
is to be in love
or so they say
being in love
means nothing goes your way
it is a hard and bumpy ride
that is sure to bring despair
you can try to hide
when it comes your way
fight and deny
feelings that you feel everyday
but when he shows his face
you jump in and follow anyway

to live is to be in love
or so they say
being in love
means nothing goes your way
it is a hard and bumpy ride
that is sure to bring despair
you can try to hide
when it comes your way
fight and deny
feelings that you feel everyday
but loving you
takes my strength away

when my heart was breaking
you came
put me back together
just for you to shatter it
and grind all the pieces

when I felt weak
you came
became my energy
just for you to make me sick
and see me fall to my knees

when you could have saved me
you came
gave me your breathe of life
just for you to squeeze it out
and watch me die twice

I believed in you
even when l knew
that one day
l will be a fool
whose canvas
has been painted blue

before you leave
think about the one's
you are leaving behind

before you lie
think about the one's
who will believe your lies

before you love
think about the one's
whose hearts you are borrowing

before you smile
think about the one's
who find warmth in that smile

before l die
listen to what l just said
above

happiness
sounds like sadness

love
sounds like hatred

truth
sounds like lies

eternity
sounds like mortality

care
sounds like hate

finding
sounds like losing

and you
sound like the death of my heart

people like people
but sometimes......









we change

Dared to be yours
Accepted that l can't be
Neglected what I could see
ln the sea that seperated you from me
Everyone denied what we could have been
Living our lives with the love we hide inside

your body crushed into mine
l knew that l was done
as l held on for my life
you looked me in the eye
and whispered things l denied

"you and l are 1"