I don't think I spend too much,
But then I spill out my shoe
Collection, an addiction sorted by hue.
Cupboards flung open to reveal the gradient of such
And don't get me started on bags and the clutch!

Rivers of life run deep,
But then I look at the contents of my journals;
The "now and not yet" cries reveal how hormonal
Am I. Dim focus on the eternal creeps
To cover more of the heart, I try to keep.

New year near and nearer;
But a return to stillness yearns.
When we hide, these addictions burn,
Igniting guilt, shame and all,
Where are you simplicity? Is this the fall?

The garden is gone sweet one,
seeds we sowed
And plants we grow,
The harvests to be for now..
are none.

I will wait til at last,
For cold seasons pass
While sheets of ice  prevail

The soil of fray;
today
So cracked and dry
no water to flow
All lonely and Grey;

For now

Yet these roots of mines
Yearn for my sunshine
Your ray's to lay down with me

Your gardener watches,
Waits tried and true,
With open arms and eyes of blue....

Forever blue
With happiness too
A rushing firmament
Upon our natures

Severing the real-ness
Of our every drink or soda;
Our mistrust and laziness
Sorting the true yearnings

For we can do better
By an electric storm
Of our brain
Overseeing all

My heart is a thousand hands
Grasping
At thin air

My heart is a thousand hands
Pulling
Tweaking
Cupping
Grasping
Kneading
Scratching
Bringing so much life to its core
That it collapses with
Exhaustion

My heart is a thousands hands

My body is a constant contraction
Cutting off all energy
Waiting to meet its ultimate desire
To spur its deepest breath
And an inward flow of life

Dear Darling
What turns me on
Isn’t the thought of you
On that date
That you held me
At my waist
Pulling me to you
What turns me on
Is what your tongue
Can do to the moist heat
Between my legs
And I look forward
To a sensuous serendipity
When it’s least expected of you

let me dwell in dreams and search my soul in the stealth of the night
let me lay my mind to rest and release my worries and fright
in silence I can ease my fears and gratify my pride
and wallow within a gentle charm until the dawn abides

let me soar above the peaked mountain abreast with eagles
and admire the pristine splendor visible before my eyes
while sunlight bathe my skin with soothing warmth of life
let my broad wings fortify God’s work from unending strife

let me endure blissfulness in a vivid, willowy stream
in a world of confusion where happiness ceases to gleam
and in my quest for peace I wish for that enduring power
so that I may reach the horizon where future is brighter

let my visions capture images that are blind to humans
or hear even the faintest clamor of newly born infants
let me feel a heart beating from a body bereft of breath
so I can deliver playful dreams instead of ugly death

let my existence be complete and infinite in all days
with all understanding that is worthy of honest praise
let the warmth of life be felt in every whispered breath
until my journey ends in a dark unreachable depth.

20 October 2011*

Some things are so distant, hard to get
Just like people who easily forget
All through these years, little have remained
Of beautiful memories bleached 'n' stained

Standin' b'fore the ruins of the past
Destroyed by personal desires and greedy lust
Come fallin' off the ground like a raw fruit
Too young to nourish, cannot face the truth

I can hardly recall our comings 'n' goings together
Our beginnings 'n' endings scattered somewhere
Too much pretenses, void of true feelings
We're sour grapes contemplatin' for lost things

Stayin' or leavin' doesnt matter
It's a choice I've not decided soon after
This head hurts thinkin' too much
Some things are b'yond recall as old love is such