indulgence and bliss
two sides of the same coin and a wish
once listless
now released—
she hums.

If you feel like
you've been going through hell,
if you feel you've thrown
all your coins
into the bottom of the wishing well,
if you feel like
you want to scream and yell,
I want you to know
it's okay to let yourself break.
Because there's only so much
people can take.
And when you make a mistake,
just know it will be okay.
Because tomorrow's another day.

A descriptive word
I not often would present
To myself
Has been cast in blindness
By the spotlight

The curtain distorts
The intentions
Of even my own
Acknowledgment

Dwelling at my reflection in the water
When ripples form
At another coin I toss
Wishing

Wishing at a well
Instead of planning,
Because planning
Makes the dream real,
And I’m afraid of reality.

I could spend my whole life
Staring into my reflection
Debating on what I'm worthy of wishing,
Instead of not letting those thoughts
Take over my mind
Fidgeting with coins between my fingers
Before I inevitably let flick,
Instead of pretending I believe in myself
And take a chance on something.

Why would I rather
Be alone
Than run into
Your open arms
Waiting for me?

What things are so important
That I cannot just turn away
So easily?
Doing nothing
Instead of loving.

What the hell is wrong with me?

When we wished
Wells rippled with the
Echo of their insistance
To be real.
When we dreamed
Days were seamless
Endless in their possibilities
Boundless in their magic.

I ran towards the door
not so they could let me inside
I pushed through the crowd
not so i could buy
I thew a coin to the wishing-well
not because it was a transaction
I said nice things to my reflection
not for him to  reply
I ran towards the door
not so they could let me inside
I wanted to feel the option
to be kissed by lips
not the curb of the pavement
I hoped I knelt I prayed
I never asked for a reality
just the right to dream
for a reason to live isn't needed
when i can make a million reasons not to die

Gadiaseite ~ gad-EEE-ah-site ~ NOUN
Definition:
The great abyss of the empty page, a wishing well with churning waters so deep you can't see the bottom—only the shimmer of coins shine through, entwined with the efforts of past attempts—you can recover the wishes but only if you hold your breath and dive into the unknown waters.

Etymology:
Derived from the Latin word Gaida meaning waiting and the German word Seiten meaning pages.

As she fell down the wishing well,
A stray thought wormed right in,
“Who am I?
Am I’m Alice? The one with travelled the Looking Glass?
The one who fought the Jabberwocky?
Or perhaps the one who lost her head?
My own head feels a bit lost,
So I must be her, falling down to reality.”

There is a wishing well where I live,
filled with coins down the bottom,
some are shiny, some old, some rusting into the water.
Circles of copper, silver, aluminum and gold.
Here I will take a bet,
throw my first quarter into the pond,
There it falls with a bubbly thud.
Day by day I will sit by it, murmur a silent prayer,
Doing nothing as the sun set.
So when the dawn comes,
I will get exactly the opposite
of what I wished for,
My coin lost among the thousands,
In this miraculous wishing well.

Plop! goes the tiny coin
Sinking into the little well
Side to side it goes before
It reaches the bottom of it

Clasped my hands together
To make a little wish
A smile creeps up my face
As I think of him

Whispers escaped my lips
I wish...
           I wish...
                      I wish...

Gentle wants no more than greed
Holding your hand in need
Of your happiness, health, peace
For your deserving self to breathe

Finest of them all
Gentlest of all lambs
Burdens for you begone
Get the things you have longed for

I wish...
           I wish...
                      I wish...

To the wishing well
Even if it may be a myth
But I always believe
Someone up there will ensure your well-being




*Even when I do not exist