With little will
Will I commit
A crime that
equals a **** Who has the  will to permit
**** ME
will me to die before  I am able to find my thrill
In this  life before
i **** **** ****.
do you have the will?

the lights beamed ahead with an intense ferocity
and the cars race by my slow moving eyes
and a bug, a thought crept down my spine
i could never be like them
not with my empty tank
not with the hands i tied behind my back
not sitting in the backseat
watching my life fly away from me
the front seat remains empty
the wheel jeers
while i peer at that front seat day after day
longing to feel the smooth leather against tired skin
but
never growing up enough
never finding the courage to love
enough to live my life

Late after we've all gone to bed
I'd always find myself awake
With my ears being mistreated
Didn't mean to hear evils spill

I tried my best to go to sleep

But each night tears were shed
I heard everything slowly break
When daddy admitted he cheated
Then mama could only shrill

Yet all I wanted was sleep

Once more daddy had gone and fled
Left mama to feel the same heartache
Because history had surely repeated
As it was that night life lost it's thrill

Then I cried myself to sleep

In this season of life where you feel like you belong nowhere, know this:
It will not always be like this.
You will not always feel alone.
Someday, your season of transition will be over and you will feel settled somewhere
One day you will have friends and you will be happy.
One day you will have a place where you belong.
Life will never be perfectly easy for you but each mountain you climb will be smaller than the last,
Like dominoes falling down, things will fall into place for you and know this too:
You were not made to blend in, but nor were you made to feel alone.
The pain you feel now will one day help you tell your story
And in time you will see that resilience runs in your veins.

The only way your demons can hurt you,
Is if you let them break your will and surrender.
But if you keep fighting you shall never perish,
You'll find each one fall with a single slash.
And that you're stronger than any of your demons.

Comfort is nice but mundane bores
I must explore the wonders of sea
My thoughts take wings, zest soars
I set sail on my journey with glee

A crushing wave, a sudden slip
Yanking my board from under my feet
Hither tither I scramble for a grip
Boy this feels, anything but sweet

Not what I thought - no easy play
Things just aren't going my way
I look for reason, reason flees
Reason tells me meaning you’ll see

Tired of evil, tired of this ploy
I loosen my grip, I free control
In this moment, I now enjoy
The ebb and flow of the larger whole

A storm revisits, I know the drill
I'm tossed again in life's caprice
I align my will with divine will
And now I sail the winds with ease

My heart has been yanked from its place
The cold fever has turned my head into a fading disgrace
Someday, the bottled ocean shall find its heart's rest place
The paleness shall leave me
The waves will stop moving so much
I just might place the words in those holes to describe peace