Caressing the void
With honeyed fingertips
So that when it
Swallows me whole
It does so gently.

This is the chronicle of life.

The stars collided,
The asteroids went astray,
And the comets pour down like snow.
What we don’t know—
Is the breath of life beyond the void.
The waves of sound that signifies a kingdom;
The clashing of worlds and survival of men.
That’s how it is.
Time and space is immaterial.
Without doubt,
The universe is vast, enormous and mysterious from afar.
However, life will always be a war.
Fought between men—
With bows and arrows,
With swords and shields,
With spears and poisons,
With guns and cannons.
And in the end,
It will be a bloodbath.
As red as scarlet;
As black as the darkness.
Yet its horrors and ghosts form part of what we call— history.
That’s how it is.
Time and space is immaterial.
The universe is vast, enormous and mysterious from afar.
And all of these will be forgotten:
Like a death of a distant star.

This is the chronicle of life.

with every step i’m taking
i can feel you’re not around
my hands just won’t stop shaking
heart hurts more than open wound

and i see the sun is rising
trying not to feel that hole
then i’m slowly realizing
i’m walking body with no soul

Toes curl around the precipice,
quivering with fear and anticipation.
Will I be brave enough to take the leap?
Is there anything left for me if I do?

Furious winds shove me away,
echoing the warning they offer to all who trespass:
"You are not welcome here.
Turn back now or face your demise."

Throat clenching, eyes burning, I stare into the void
and it replies, breath hot on my frozen ears;
"You could have eternity, love, freedom,
everything denied to you so far. I have it all."

It purrs it's promises with a silver tounge,
words dipped in honey and roses.
But underneath it all is a mournful refrain,
whispering of a permanent end to my existence.

One last look is all I can offer,
strength draining from my chest.
I know now what I need to do.
Peace stood before me with open arms,

and I turned away.
Propelled by the winds whose advice I had chosen,
I walked into the blinding light of the sun behind me,
stumbling but on my own feet,

continuing my journey
until I could find a better end.
Even if a single jump could give me all I've craved,
the price it would cost was more than I could pay.

I'll just have to make my own peace.

They idolized my deep seeded melancholia
claiming it graceful and unique

it was neither of those qualities however

subtly  existing was a despairing emptiness within the deepest depths of human consciousness,

someone whom ought not be idolized in the slightest

born in disorder
heart in unrest
instability within my soul
with chaos for bones.

if the anguish ensconced within my heart alongside the distress infused in my soul were translated upon my skin
you wouldn’t recognize me..
.. as broken as I am

🕳

She used to feel whole but feels empty inside
You were her everything
You made her laugh,
Smile and even comforted her
When she was weak
But feels this deep void of pain
That she doesn’t fully understand
You say that she changed
I would say you have too
All of the endless yelling at her changed
A part of her
she became more withdrawn with her emotions
More careful of what she said and do out of fear
More cautious with my words
And hesitant with moving forward
She can explain as to why she changed
From that bright and bubbly person that you met
Two years ago
You see that person two years ago
Realized that she had the whole world ahead of her
She built up the courage to say no instead of pleasing others
Recovering from mental abuse and realizing
She deserved better in life
And wouldn’t settle for less
Unfortunately, that feeling didn’t last
Because of the pointless fighting and jealousy
She became depressed and fearful
Because the thought of losing you
Is to painful to bare
But continuing this cycle of pain
Seems hopeless
she wants to be that person again
She is buried somewhere deep inside
In that empty void
Just waiting to come out again
But out of fear of being criticized
By someone who she thought she loved
It might take her longer to resurface again
As times have changed
And her future is uncertain
She is torn
Form finding her independence
And forging her own path
Or hoping on a dream that wasn’t hers, to begin with
This empty void
She felt this before
This hopeless and lonely feeling
She knows all too well
It brings her no comfort
But endless tears at night
Crying to herself wondering when this pain will end
Did the distance break them?
Was it too much for there love to handle?
She would like to think it’s not
But all of this pain and yelling seems to never end
She needs to see that man that she fell in love with
Two years ago
The thoughtful, caring, spontaneous, understanding man
That she felt safe with
His insecurities have drained her
No more fight is left within her
Save for one
Her will for independence
That hasn’t died yet in this empty void
If you cant see the hurting
That is happening inside
You are the one that is blinded
By either control or jealousy
It makes no difference
This empty void will pass
When she sees the man
That swept her off her feet
Two years ago

I am not an intellect
nor am I a savant.

A perpetual and eternal seeker, an intrigued observer if you will.

No longer searching for rational explanations amongst the cosmos, no external modus operandi,
none whatsoever.

Gratefully cognizant,
I am, of the personally attained enlightenment
permeating throughout my being, though, under no circumstance shall I deem existence as being the cherished paragon which is so blatantly strewn throughout the benign amicability of such fabricated fables for which society, oh so, lackadaisically prescribes.

Quite parallel to those who’ve consciously abolished the utter self-delusionment that reality’s illusory plight thoughtlessly provokes I, we, remain within an amalgamation of idiocy, chaos, maelstrom, and fantasy.