Open up you say
Sure,
I'd love too
If even just for a little something new
A simple change of view
Although to keep this bit of honesty true,
I should tell you,
I don't necessarily care for this solo walkthrough
I'm a little tired of the empty echo in this venue
But,
Allowing someone in isn't worth another self worth issue
See,
One can be a lonely number, but so can two

©2024

From my view, while side eyeing beyond the periphery
I basically see a place that's not a place anybody would actually choose to be
But when it's the landscape of your own psyche
It's hard to see any way out of the intensity that will always accompany insanity
And no one can hear your inner voice plea for much needed mercy
Begging yourself to set yourself free
But this inescapable captivity is your eternity
But it just occurred to me,
I can't tell if this is free will or destiny...
Did I choose to fall slowly?
Maybe I decided to come undone gradually
Or did some higher power think this was best for me?
Either way's bad news for my trajectory  
Zero possibly of a redemption story
No guts
No glory
Just constantly repeating "sorry"

©2024

I hang a mangled backdrop
A set prop
To keep from view
That I got
Behind the scenes rot
And there's a lot

©2024

...I hear ya, I do
I just don't find what's been said to be true
But if I take a look through your view
And in lue of the downward spiral conducted by the waves of blue that I've now seen you go through
I want to go ahead and attempt something new
What do you say we put aside debate and simply conversate for a few
A little bit of back and forth like birds of a feather seem to do
Why don't you choose a neutral venue
And I'll collect the short guest list of me, myself and I plus you

©2024

Open whole heart for you

Cautiously flip every stone so you may view it's front and back

Understand ins and outs

And where surface chips and cracks

Correct me without saying words

Context unnecessary

Highlight favorites
I can catalog your desires in my mental filing cabinet

Your memorable features listed in numerical order in one folder

And when you finally witnessed every nook and cranny
Are done exploring the regions of my body
Brain
Soul
Turn away

Then waltz out of life like a tourist catching the red eye flight home

Always different but somehow not new
That's the only way I can frame this walkthrough,
The day to day I walk through
To look through these eyes is not something I'd wish on any of you
At best it's glitchy level design, I can't get a map I don't fall through
Worst, this is all predestined,
like wrestlin',
Every blow right on queue
A nonconsensual change of view
Not only but mostly due to the view of what relentlessly plays out in the minds eye,
A prisonesque venue
I didn't use faulty glue to put this mess together,
Who would choose this to turn into?
Nobody buddy,
Bad seeds planted in toxic soil is why this shiit you see here grew
This isn't the standard "good plan gone askew"
This miniscule piece of timeline was doomed from debut
In every story there's never enough time to repair before I will predictively have to leave you
At least according to the solo read through
Please forgive me for I loved you the only way I knew how too
My "how-to" example did more damage than I could undo
This is already more than anybody expected me to amount to
These aren't woven excuses, this is off the cuff, from the heart impromptu
I just want you to be the one who doesn't see me like they do
I know that's a lot of me to ask of you

©2024

We are not the same, I am not like you
And that's not a flex 'cause honestly I constantly try too hard to
Every new "new me" falls apart moments after it's debut
If I stay true to who I am I promise you not a single person will enjoy that view
No one ever has, no one ever will, it's almost a skill, bullshido kung-fu
I've already been told, "look around fool, not a soul likes that you."
"You have nobody buddy except for maybe the presence of two"
"But only 'cause they don't know what's truly lurking beneath the surface level you"
Just a few more things I wish weren't true but life never forgets to remind me right on cue
It cuts right through, fills the blue, will be what leaves me the same permanent hue
The new question becomes do I need more than a few? Do I want a big crew?
And will they even stick around without some sort of voodoo or glue?
I have no clue, but it's never for long if they ever decide to
So what's a guy to do?

©2023