My sword is bent
and my shield is shattered
My armor is cracked
and my heart is battered

I just don't understand what you feel
First, you're here
Then, you're gone
You act like you've got nothing done
You're always in a hurry
Always in a rush
You act like you've got no one to love
But
I'm here
And I always will be
I know future is not trustworthy
But I got something to hold onto
I got you
But I wish I got you, in my arms
Because
I want to feel your touch
Your hands' cold or warmth of your heart
But then
Again
You're just,
gone

Alone,
on my own
Just me
and my thoughts
Only,
this person
Its feelings
and nothing more

Thinking,
alone
Talking,
in my world
They don't,
hear me
'Cause I'm just,
on my own

Screaming,
punching the walls
No one comes
'Cause i'm at home,
with me
and myself
Doesn't ring,
even my phone

Saying,
this and that
Why are you,
so ******* bad?
I don't,
even understand,
why are you,
so ******* dead?

Open,
your ******* eyes!
There's no one,
who can realise,
that you,
******* exist!
That's why,
you want to end it,
all
So you can be,
in the dark,
alone

Just

on

your

own

Do I dare say that I wish I was invisible
That people didn’t look at me and on the streets I could walk peacefully
No shady eyes or stares
Perhaps it’s my paranoia and perhaps nobody cares
The thing that gets me the most about life
Is the insurmountable amount of hype
I get it’s a gift and believe me, I’m grateful
But this distasteful existence I lead is starting to get to my head
Like the smell of cigarettes in my mothers car
No matter how far the drive I would hold my breath and hope to survive
I kind of feel like life is this way
Because despite my actions day to day I still wonder why I’m here and what is it that I walk on the street and fear
Is it the people and their perceptions
Or is it me and how I view myself
Fearful of astral projecting it onto everybody else
If they thought of me the way I think of me then holy hell what a different world this would be
I can’t understand why I float about here in space
But in case you were wondering I’m here for love and it doesn’t matter if you call me a disgrace
I think the man I’m in love with is from heaven above
And yes it’s unconventional, after all we live in to separate worlds
But he sees me for me and not my childish comments as a girl
For a second can you think what it would be like to not exist?
That’s a crisis all in itself and scientists are always ****** when you ask them what comes next in life for the dead
They can’t wrap their head around not being here
So they discount the new studies that come out every year
I don’t know what to believe and I really don’t care
Just get me away from this place so I can leave and be fine
I want to disappear like an erased pencil line