I wish I would have been a nomad,
I would have travelled to the places no one had.
I wish I was a voracious reader,
Books would have helped me to forget her.
If life would not have been such a mystery,
It would have been easy to forget my history.
I wish I was another wanderlust
In a world which seems to forget so fast.
I never wanted to be like me.
I wish I was not me!








Tanay Sengupta, Copyright © 2018. All Rights Reserved.

Roses are red
Violets are blue
Rhyming is overrated

In a tennis court they write it down in red.
That typical swear about togetherness until the very end.
Then they fought over the dividends.

"i can't box you"* he says to me
narrowing his firewood eyes
the silver air breathing spring
i get closer to the warmth of his body
and smile-

because i can box myself so ******* perfectly
it's the thing i hate the most
i'm your typical straight A
anghsty teenager
who never called herself a poet
but spends her days writing
to boys who never loved her
and a dad who was never there
i had a photography phase-
which girl hasn't?
took pictures of people
when they weren't looking
finding beauty in others
when what i needed most
was to find beauty in myself
went through an anorexic phase
i'm better now-
skinnier than before, but,
i eat a single 1200 calorie meal
but take my coffee without sugar
(saving the dime and spending the dollar)
tried finding myself by hurting myself
and even though the blades disappeared after a while
the pain kinda lasted
but you know, it's not all that bad
i mean, i eat, i sleep, i jog, i read
i sing in the shower
i live in a house with a mom who loves me
a sister who loves me so much that she hates me
i'm your typical kid
stuck between self-worship and self-loathing
loved taylor swift,
loved fallout boy
get the picture now?
thought that rebelling would give me fulfillment
cut my hair and dyed it orange
ran away to my best friend's house
watched her have *** with boys twice her age
sat alone in a corner away from their embraces
because the black eyeliner and leather jacket
still hadn't seeped their way into my heart
(don't touch me i'm afraid)
i had my first kiss at 16
i had *** at 17
i had my first pregnancy scare at 18
(don't worry we used protection)
i promised to marry him
but kept him a secret because my parents wouldn't approve
come on-
does it get more 'boxable' than that?

'you're so different.' he mumbles
between breaths tainted with the taste of my skin
i play with his fingers
(i think i'm in love with the birthmark on his knuckles)
he takes my silence for agreement
and i kiss him goodnight
driving back to my white-picket fence house
taking off my shoes before entering
my mom doesn't like ***** shoes on the carpet.

Candy-sweet ballads
****** heartache arias
Undying
soulmate
anthems

Everywhere I go
The soundtrack never changes
But no one else
seems
to notice

Red-rose shades of white noise
Heart-shaped confetti stuck in my ears
Jangling
omnipresent
sound waves

The song everyone is singing
Grates against my inner drum
It's not
the kind
I'm looking for

Words emerge like birds

But this feeling can't be put into simpler words
Absurd

Let's fly away and never look back
You a writer or a poet
Lets do whatever we good at

Like catnap
I am a cool cat
Let me tell you something
Without you I'm a soulless with nothing

I close my eyes
That's the only time we kiss

Poetry or writing
One of you is my other piece

No limits allowed
No limits exists

I'm smart we can never part
My question is...
Who's got the other piece of my heart

Golden child, one of a kind
Send me risqué pictures
I am a typical person I don't mind

Sei bellissima, Te amo

I'll tell you again till the end of time

Got my pen bleeding with love
No lust
Just feelings required

A figment of my brains imagination
Poetry be the one

A beauty within thoughts of thy nation
Writing resembling none

I should just intertwine poetry with my writings
Like how I made love & hate siblings

typically "typical"
is thought predictable
where typical types
emerge in the syllables

man = white = *******! = no ****, right?
girl = cis = delicate ≠ this.

type up the typology
categorize into "ologies"
start stereotyping
to support the philosophies

f(i) = she = sweet ≠ me
∴ ***** i must be

draw a box around me ⇒ i'll fit
type up a label ⇒ it'll stick

but ≠ me
      = us = we
is that the type of person
you want to be?