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cleo 2d
turn back the clocks, rewind it
there's something else behind this
not that hard to find it
but hard enough to fight it
cleo 2d
a broken plate
with its sharp edges
and dwindling purpose
cleo 2d
it's the most heart wrenching thing
he forced his way back in again
thought i was safe in my dreams
but it seems he's still haunting me

can't shake the feeling of his touch
i wouldn't call what we had 'love'
younger me didn't know enough
to get out of that hole i'd dug
sometimes you sit in the dark all alone
and it's not a guiding light that you want,
but for someone to be there with you,
to know that they know the dark, too,
to have them keep you company.
for the light can become a trap, you see,
like a constant pressure to push through,
so you'd rather have someone stay with you
to practice counting each other's breaths.
there's a sense of hope to mutual setbacks,
tethered by the unseen hand you're holding
as you co-write a step-by-step guide to coping.
I kiss the wounds you left behind

Because at least these scars

Would never leave me
If I never loved him, would I have still found you?
Our meeting was so random, but it was kind of his fault too
If I hadn't left him,
I wouldn't have opened up that game,
And if I never did that- would you ever know my name?
If we take it further from all the trauma I went through, had I not lived through it, would my path still have stopped at you?
At what point in this timeline was our fate decided?
I think about this all the time- I've over analyzed it.
If she didn't have me at sixteen,
maybe my childhood could've been abuse free,
If my dad wasn't a ******* ***, I could have lived at home and not dropped out of class,
If I didn't isolate at my grandmother's house, would I have been strong- less like a mouse?
If a heart attack didn't take her from me, I'd have never gotten close to him in 2015
If I hadn't suffered a decade with him,
I'd have never been in Salem
with my sister's on a whim
If I wasn't damaged would I have ran? Maybe then we'd get the life sometimes we would plan
If none of this happened I'd just like to know,
Was my soul always destined
for yours to know?
Meeting you while still healing will always haunt me, but maybe the wounds led me to you.
Could we have met later?
Or is fate so cruel, this was our one chance?
Never let someone who hasn't been in your shoes tell you how to tie your laces.
Laces are complicated, and they take time to figure out.
If you can't tie your laces, you'll figure it out eventually.
It's okay if you need help tying your laces, we all start somewhere.

Are your laces *****? We can clean them.
Too thin? It'll work out somehow.
Thick? We'll find a way.
If you have velcro instead, that's okay too.

You can't tie your laces in a normal way? We can find another one, even if it's more complex.
If you don't tie your laces, you'll fall in them.
If you do, you can keep walking, maybe even run,
and eventually forget you had laces in the first place.

In the end, you'll realise that,
your laces, messy or neat,
have always been yours,
and that's enough.
So I'm actually quite proud of this one, this poem talks about trauma recovery, it's not an easy journey, but at the end of the day, it's your journey. And you can choose where to "walk."

Let it be the Mountain she finds Holy—
not because it sparkles,
seduces her
or speaks in riddles,

but because its dark loamy soil
receives her bare feet like a memory.

A prairie hill above the sea,
where grasses bow and whisper,
and the wind carries the salt and scent of things
too old for names—
that’s where the house stands.
Not built from stone,
but from time.
And longing.

And the laughter of those
who once remembered Eden.

Let her dig down,
as if the roots of a wildflower
were waiting to rise through her skin,
lifting her slowly from within—
the stem, the pistil,
the fragile yet indestructible bloom.
Let the soil speak to her in silence,
saying:

You are still loved.
You are still alive.
You are not what happened to you.


Let her turn toward the sun—
not in shame,
but in radiant defiance—
and know in that moment
where her help truly comes from.

Let her running to the mountain
be joy, not dread.
Let her ascent be not an exile,
but a return.

Let her wings unfold brazenly,
as the daughter of the living God.
Not tucked.
Not hidden.
Not compromised.

She does not belong to the mountain that mocks love
and feeds on the ruin of hearts,
or exploits that which is still unhealed

She belongs here—
where her own flesh and bone
become not only family
but friend,
through the common bond
of the soil that gives life to all who dare to sink into it.

She belongs
where peace lives in warm light on cold nights,
where cotton sheets smell of soap and skin,
and starlight sifts through trees
like the hush of forgiveness.

Let her remember her first love..
before the theft,
before the theater.
Before the wound.

Let her toes remember
what it was to wiggle in the dirt
of something unbroken,
unshamed,
true.

Let her find home again—
not in a place carved out for her,
but in the space she reclaims
with her own rootedness.

Let her petals unfold slowly in the sun—
but only with her feet deep in the mountain's soil,
where others also have planted their lives,
becoming one
in harmony of breath and memory and Grace.

She will not enter into a sepulcher
or a place that makes usury of her pain.
She will stand on the mount before the rising sun—
alone if she must,
but never abandoned.

And somewhere in the hush between
the breeze and the soil,
she may yet feel

the quiet echo
of someone still with her.

Let the flower breathe the free air
  and  she  will  sing...


"In an old house on a hillside
Next to the sea
Far from the madness, that folds around me
Peaceful and gentle, like sails on the breeze

In an old house on a hillside
Next to the sea
There's a warm light on a cold night
And clean cotton sheets
Soap smellin' skin and tinglin' feet
With stars linin' the skyline
And shine through the trees

In an old house on a hillside
Next to the sea
And when the autumn comes down
We'll get what we need from the town
And all of our friends will be round

In an old house on a hillside
Next to the sea
Moon white as paper and night black as sleep
With old things behind us and new things to be

In an old house on a hillside
Next to the sea

And when the sunshine comes down
My hair will turn golden
And my skin will turn brown

And all of our friends will be round"

https://youtu.be/FPQyn36gzlY?si=B5mtweJP3pbu6jqO

#MattersoftheHeart
Your words were small,
but they split me open-
quiet knives
dressed as truth.

I carried your words
like glass under skin-
invisible,
but cutting every time I moved.

Every syllable,
a small death I swallowed
just to stay close.

I bled in silence
so you wouldn’t hear
what you’d done.

I’ve never healed right
from the sound
of your voice
telling me
I wasn’t enough.
You hurt me with hands that once healed,
and still, I kiss the wounds you leave behind.

You are my poison and my prayer.
A god I can’t stop kneeling for,
even as the altar crumbles under me.

We are saints of suffering,
bound not by grace,
but by the echo of every scream we swallowed,
just to stay.


The silence.
The sweetness that comes too late
and still tastes like heaven.
I know the cage,
and I decorate it in your name.
Call it temple.
Call it home.

You say you love me
in the same breath that cuts me.
And I believe you.
Not because it’s true,
but because it has to be.
Because if it isn’t,
then what am I left with
but ruin?
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