You
touched her,
her dignity
laying lifeless on the ground
staring
at a monster
even the animals
wouldn't look at
now

There’s an “e” in your name.
2. It’s also composes a syllable of it.
3. Things will always empty, no matter what. Even bottles, for example. Especially ones that contained alcohol. You seemed to enjoy emptying those quite a lot.
4. Once, I emptied a pen of it’s ink while writing about you.
5. There is no “e” in my first name, but you pronounced it as if there was, replacing the first “a” with an “e”.
6. I always, and still do, get annoyed whenever people mispronounce my name, but never when you did it. I always knew that you were the one calling it. You were the one thing I was always sure of.
7. The other night, I tried to think of other things that started with “e” and “a”. I found “always” and “eventually”. Just as you substituted the “e” for the “a”, we substituted “always” for “eventually”.
8. Or maybe it could stand for “eventually an alcoholic”?
9. I just wish that you could have emptied your heart out to us just as easily as you could empty a bottle down your throat.
10. Ever since you told us that you drove home drunk I’ve been thinking about writing an eulogy.
11. Please don’t make me write one. Not while we’re so young.
12. Eventually, everything expires, like our patience, our vitality, and our days.
13. You haven’t spoken to anyone in months, and I don’t know how to reach you, or if you even want me to. When I saw your mother this past October, I wanted to ask her if she knew had badly you had been struggling, but I didn’t because I know that you would have hated me for it. There was a reason you had tried to keep your addiction a secret.
14. The letter “e” is the most used letter in the alphabet. How can you ask me to forget you when nearly every word I write has a trace of you in it?
15. I would never pick up a pen again if it meant that I could hear you mispronounce my name one more time.

At Eighteen.
She was lost,
Bleeding from inside out
With wounds unhealed from her past,
But all they saw was her lustic smile.
She, a beautiful flower drowning in the deep-
Under the grasp of self destruct,
Silently, She called for help but they didn't listen.
All they chose to see was beauty
covering the ugly truth of her imperfect life,
They chose the lies because it was easy,
It is easy to think one is fine, after all
“It saves you the emotional energy they said"
While she sunk deeper into the deep,
a black hole called reality
She awaited for signs that someone noticed
both her pain and joy
But all they chose to see way the joy
Until sadness took that away
Through the unholy vessel called anxiety and,
Depression her ally
She finally lost her spark
And all they chose to see were her beautiful memories (Lies)
Covering yet another part of her ,
Her story and the battles she fought
All on her own

I
never knew you could affect me the most
I
never knew you could be the music to my ears

See?
you don't know these things don't you?

It happens everyday
until one day
it'll ******* away
far away

and then all of the sudden,

she wears crumbs of roses on her cheeks like
it's nothing,

she wears angel's dust on her eyes like
it's nothing,

she wears clothing that

waltzes around her waists

and whispers around her ******* like
it's nothing,

she wears King Tut's bangles
on the tips of her ears like
it's nothing,

and now
she wears me on her hip
dangling at the tip of a single polished nail, like
i'm nothing,

we're nothing

no

i'm nothing.

The ground is as cold as her hands are,
As cold as her tears in the snow.

This place, she calls it; The Weeping Willow,
Because all she ever does here is cry.

It's branches hang lovingly over her head,
It's leaves mirroring her hair over her face,
Mirrored by the water.

It's a wonder that the tree can even stand;
It's been watered with nothing but salt-water and heartbreak.


Surely something born from the broken
Should never be whole to start with.